


Drops in the Bucket

by Kereea



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comedy, Drama, F/F, F/M, Family, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, discussion of suicidal thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-17
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2018-01-19 16:43:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 40
Words: 53,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1476808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kereea/pseuds/Kereea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Obito came onto a scene not of Rin impaled on lightning, but Rin struggling to keep Kakashi conscious. This time Kakashi has to control a demon, Obito has to try and remember what he forgot, and they both are going to need each other.</p><p>Series of drabbles and oneshots that turned into a chapter fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Another

He heard them before he saw them. Rin sounded like she was scared.

“Come on, just a bit further, if we find somewhere-”

“We’re not going to be able to hide.” Kakashi’s voice scared him more, though, because it sounded so worn down. “Just _go_.”

“No!” Rin snapped. “Come on, hurry, we can outrun them!”

‘ _I don’t get it’_ Guruguru said. ‘ _What I was hearing about…it sounded worse than running away._ ’

Obito missed a branch and plummeted to the rocky ground as he heard Rin scream Kakashi’s name.

He could see them now. Rin was trying to pulled a crumpled Kakashi—and it was _Kakashi_ , he was the genius, he should never look like that—to his feet and Kakashi was trying to just shove her away.

Suddenly Kakashi’s head snapped up. Obito didn’t know how but he saw what Kakashi saw—was it their shared Sharingan?—and could see the Mist ninja lunge for his teammates-

“ _NO_!”

He didn’t know how, but somehow that caused roots to burst from the ground and tear into the Mist ninja. He didn’t care, as long as his teammates were still alive.

“Oh my god.” Rin was staring at him, wide-eyed. “You—you can’t…who do you think you are? Trying to trick us like this?”

Obito flinched. Yeah, he could see how they could think that. He quickly spat out the first thing he could think an imposter wouldn’t know, “I-I lost in chunin prelims by choking on candy when Gai kicked me for giving him a thumbs down?”

“Obito?” God Kakashi looked bad. Even with the mask hiding most of his face Obito could tell he was banged up and worn out.

“Hey, Bakashi,” he said. “Sorry it took so long. Got kidnapped by…by…” He couldn’t seem to mouth the words.

‘ _No telling if you stay_ ,’ Guruguru said. ‘ _And I have to go if you stay_.’

Oh shit. That might mean no one would see Madara’s plan coming…but then if Madara needed him, wouldn’t him saying no be a _good_ thing? Oh man, what a time to spring that one him…

“Anyway, I’m kinda using a one-time technique to stay standing now, don’t know how long it’ll work. I still feel like hell,” he lied.

“You survived. Oh my god, we just left you and you…oh my god,” Rin muttered.

“Obito, you have to listen to me,” Kakashi said, and Obito winced at how much effort it was clearly taking his teammate just to talk. “You and Rin have to get out of here. Now.”

“What? No! I finally broke out because I heard you two were in trouble!” Obito shouted. “Come on, we’ll get you home-”

“No!” Kakashi yelled, finally managing to evade Rin and push himself further from them both. “Don’t you get it, that’s what Mist wants! They sealed… _something_ in me so when someone ‘rescued’ me and brought me back to the Leaf it would destroy everything!”

“Let me see. Sensei showed me some seal stuff, maybe I can do something!” Obito said. “There’s got to be something we can do, can’t we get sensei or someone?”

“Sense’s in Iwa,” Rin said.

“Then that pervert-teacher of his!” Obito said. “Come on, we need to do something!”

“You need to _run_ damn it!” Kakashi hissed before his mismatched eyes rolled back in his head and he passed out.

“No, Kakashi! Kakashi!” Obito said, shaking him.

“If they sealed something into him, the seal has to be on him somewhere!” Rin said. “Come _on_ , Obito, we have to find it.”

The first place the checked was the chest Kakashi had been clutching at. There, faintly glowing red, was a seal carved into his skin.

“Oh god,” Rin said.

“Rin…give me a kunai,” Obito said. “I know how to turn this from explosive to containment, at least.”

“What? You mean…” she said, fumbling for the weapons anyway.

“We don’t have any ink, and the rest is cut in anyway. Just…heal him if he starts bleeding too much. I think I can at least keep it safe to get him near Konoha, then we can flag down someone to get sensei’s sensei,” Obito said. “It’s like turning an explosive tag into a storage tag. No big deal.”

He wasn’t saying that two hours later when Kakashi still didn’t wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random plotbunnies strike again! And this time, it's a oneshot collection! Yay!


	2. Memory

“I told you, I barely remember fixing the seal,” Obito said. “It’s all hazy.”

“He’s telling the truth,” Inoichi told Minato. “From passing out under the rocks to finding his team again it’s all blank, and everything until Jiraiya got there is out-of-focus.”

“Rin said you told them someone kidnapped you. Do you know who?” Minato asked.

Obito shook his head. “The most I remember is the name ‘Guruguru’ but I don’t know much more than that.”

“All right. We’ll try again later,” Minato said to Inoichi. The Yamanaka nodded and left.

“Sensei…am I going to be okay?” Obito asked. “I _know_ something changed after I finished Kakashi’s seal-thing, like I got woozier-”

“Rin said you told her you were using a one-time technique to allow yourself to be up despite your injuries. Besides the fact that I doubt such a technique exists-”

“I know. I think I was trying to lie to protect them. I _think_. I wish I knew.”

“Whoever had you is dangerous. Those cells on your right side are the First Hokage’s, but cloned. We think it might have been Orochimaru.”

“I…I don’t know.” Obito sighed in frustration. “I wish I could help.”

“Well, it’s just as well,” Minato sighed. “I have both my boys here and safe instead of dead. I can’t ask for more.”

“And my eye?” Obito had noticed something odd with it from when he’d woken up, only to be told he’d unlocked some ultimate technique.

“You thought Kakashi was dead. He thought he’d gotten you and Rin killed. I guess that was enough,” Minato said.

“I guess,” Obito said. “But I wish I _knew_.”


	3. Fear

Obito managed to walk far sooner than anyone thought, but he kept it a secret. He wanted to visit Kakashi because no one would let him, and being able to sneak around on his own two feet was too good a secret to tell.

He did it late at night. He nicked keys to the admin office off a nurse to find out where Kakashi was, and then set off down the halls to the part of the hospital usually reserved for dangerous patients.

He knew that right now, Kakashi technically qualified. Sensei had explained the Bijuu and how they were sealed in human hosts because he didn’t want Rin or Obito to do anything stupid.

Like this.

But Obito didn’t care. For all he knew Kakashi was dead and everyone had lied and he’d come by the Mangekyo honestly after all.

He picked the lock on the door and disarmed the seal-based alarm. Sensei shouldn’t have taught him so well, he guessed.

Obito stepped into the room, only for his jaw to drop at how wrecked the place was. The bed was overturned, chairs were smashed. “Kakashi?”

“Go away.”

Obito’s stomach dropped. Kakashi was curled up in a corner of the room, head on his knees and eyes screwed shut.

“Go away. Please.”

“No!” Obito protested. “Kakashi, what happened?”

“I got…frustrated. Go away,” Kakashi said. “I don’t think I can control it that well. I might lose it.”

“The Sanbi?” Obito asked.

Kakashi nodded jerkily.

“But sensei sealed it!”

“That doesn’t mean it’s not there!” Kakashi hissed, glaring at him. “I said ‘go away’ not ‘walk closer’ idiot!”

“So…you’re scared the Sanbi will hurt me?” Obito asked, heart breaking because here was iron-willed Kakashi sounding like a terrified little kid. Like the little kid he’d never actually sounded like even when he was one. “Why?”

“I can hear it. Sometimes. I don’t like it,” Kakashi said. “I’m scared that maybe sensei didn’t do everything right and I’m still going to kill everyone-”

“Well stop it, because you aren’t,” Obito said, sitting next to him. “Come on, Kakashi, you really think sensei could mess up like that?”

“Anything’s possible.”

“Well I say that’s one thing that’s impossible,” Obito said stubbornly. He wrapped an arm around the younger boy. “You know, I’m scared about whatever it is I don’t remember. What if it’s something really important?”

Kakashi shrugged, “Better than being a time bomb.”

“You’re not a damned bomb, Bakashi.”

Obito wasn’t very happy that the only answer he got to that was a weak shrug as Kakashi just leaned into him and fell asleep.


	4. Why Me

“I just wish I knew why they even picked me,” Kakashi admitted, poking at his homecoming meal.

“You’re young,” Minato said. “You have incredibly adaptive chakra, what with no real issues with any elements or with control or even with making your chakra do something new and strange, like when you were inventing the Chidori. And you’re a valuable asset to Konoha, so they knew we’d bring you back and even if we failed at doing so, then we’d lose that asset by killing you.”

“Make it sound so simple, why don’t you,” Kakashi griped.

Obito frowned. Kakashi was really…bitter these days. It was a new bitter, too, not the uptight-bitterness he’d had over his dad, this was more depressed than trying-to-prove-himself. He wondered if the young jonin knew something they didn’t. “You know, for that matter, why’d whoever experimented on me do it?”

“They clearly put a lot of effort into keeping you alive,” Rin said, seemingly glad for the new topic. “I mean, cloned Senju cells tend to reject their hosts, but the ones you have are modified to avoid that. It’s why you seem to be able to use Mokuton.”

“Wait, so what would have happened if this,” Obito said, gesturing at his right side, “rejected me?”

“You’d…be dead,” Rin said, shrugging. “I was given access to a lot of Orochimaru’s old notes from when he was dabbling in cloning. It’s…not good when the cells go nuts.”

“Wow, we still have those notes?” Kakashi asked, looking interested in something for the first time in days.

“Well, yeah, they raided his labs after he left,” Minato said. “It usually requires higher security clearance, but since Rin’s the only medic Obito sees daily the Hokage and I agreed she could look over them.”

“So Obito’s going to be fine, though, right?” Kakashi asked.

“Yes, it looks like his system and the prosthetics work together perfectly,” Rin said. “And while I’m not entirely certain, I think I have an idea for how to help with some of the muscle truble you’ve had on that side, Obito.”

“Great!” Obito said, grinning. His right elbow had been bothering him a bit, he was pretty sure it was the upper-arm muscles’ fault. Fixing it would probably get him back to proper hand seals soon.

“Glad for you,” Kakashi said, his eye curving upwards very slightly in a way that Obito had decoded meant he was smiling.

“Thanks, Kakashi,” Obito said, smiling back.


	5. Wrong

“I…I can’t do it.”

Obito had seen the problem before Kakashi had admitted to it, seen the young jonin try to use a favorite fire technique of his only for it to sputter out _badly_ every time, much to Kakashi’s wide-eyed shock. “Here, try Replacement.”

Obito tossed a rock—lightly, he wasn’t some jackass—at Kakashi as the younger boy made the hand sign.

The rock bounced off Kakashi’s shoulder as no log or other object appeared to take the hit instead. Kakashi looked stricken.

“Just calm down, Kakashi,” Minato-sensei said sternly. “Your whole chakra system was recently rewritten. You control’s probably going to be shot for a while. You’ll have to work on it.”

And Obito could understand the slight panic that spilled into Kakashi’s expression then. Kakashi was used to being good at things, he usually trained only to go from good to perfect. He wasn’t used to this, for something that was easy to suddenly be way out of reach.

Obito was used to failing, so learning to jump and run and do taijutsu all over again as his body heals wasn’t that bad.

For Kakashi, it was probably something akin to torture.

“Plus your chakra reserves have expanded too,” Rin said thoughtfully. “If you’re used to working with smaller reserves, calling up the same ratio of chakra from larger ones might be part of the problem.”

Minato went to pull Kakashi aside, probably a bit away from Obito and Rin to spare his feelings. “Come on, Kakashi, time to learn tree-walking-”

“I know tree-walking!” Kakashi snapped, yanking his arm from sensei’s hand. “I know how to use the Dragon Fire technique and the Replacement technique! It’s not _working_!”

“Kakashi, it’s going to be harder right now. I just want to help,” Minato said. “You need to take it easy-Kakashi! Kakashi get back here!”

“What are we going to do?” Rin asked as their sensei continued to yell after their running teammate.

“I wish I knew,” Obito said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite having people like Killerbee confirmed as getting a Bijuu sealed into them during childhood instead of infancy, no one really looked at how that affected their abilities to do things like use chakra and so on. Seeing as how the Bijuu all have massive chakra whereas in canon Kakashi has to be careful against overdoing, I thought he might have trouble if he suddenly had to deal with much large chakra pools. Plus, as seen in the next one, Kakashi's used to this stuff coming naturally.


	6. Drunk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Suicide is mentioned, though in an intentionally ambiguous way relation to if it's being considered or not. Nonetheless, fair warning.

It was three in the morning when Obito next saw Kakashi. After two days of sensei declaring Kakashi would ‘be given his space’ the silver haired teen had showed up outside of Obito’s apartment, reeking of alcohol.

“Who the _hell_ gave you sake?” was the first sentence Obito managed.

“Jonin. Can drink if I want,” Kakashi muttered. “Can…we talk?”

“Um…sure?” He stepped aside and let Kakashi stumble in.

“Sorry I ran off…I couldn’t…couldn’t…I didn’t like that I couldn’t,” Kakashi babbled.

Obito very much wanted to know what idiot gave a thirteen-year-old that much to drink, jonin or no. Kakashi was more than three sheets to the wind, he was probably five sheets, minimum. And if Obito wasn’t so sleepy, he’d have a better metaphor. “I guess it’s hard having easy stuff…you know, be hard.”

“I’m s’posed to be better, tho,” Kakashi sighed, sinking onto Obito’s futon, currently in bed-position. “This didn’t have sheets before.”

“No it did not,” Obito said. “Kakashi, you…why get drunk?”

“Dunno. Dad did it.”

Obito shuddered. He’d heard about the White Fang before the man committed suicide, how the guy spent a lot of time just so drunk he wouldn’t know his own name in order to forget how everyone turned on him. “Kakashi…please tell me you won’t…you know…kill yourself.”

“No. That’d let the Sanbi out.”

Obito saw red. He smacked Kakashi across the face, sending the other boy to the floor. “That’s the only reason? You…you…. _Bakashi_!”

The rage died away when all Kakashi managed was to shrug. “I don’ know what else, ‘kay? I can’ even get the damn bushin right, Obi, the _bushin_. I don’ even…deserve jonin, or even chunin anymore!”

“Yes you do. You earned it,” Obito said, crouching down. “Kakashi, this isn’t your fault. You didn’t ask for this, okay? You can work through it, though, I know you. You’re one of the best ninja ever.”

“But I’m not. Not an’more,” Kakashi muttered. “Useless.”

“Don’t make me smack you again, stupid,” Obito huffed. “Got it? Every time you say you’re useless, you get smacked!”

“But I-”

Obito whacked him upside the head. “See?”

Kakashi glared at him. The hit to the head had dislodged his headband, giving Obito the pleasure of being glared at from his former eye as well, “I don’ know how t’ do this!”

“Do what?” Obito asked.

“How t…how t’ not be _good_ at stuff. I’m used t’ being good at stuff,” Kakashi said. “Obi…I don’ wanna be mean but…how do _you_ deal wit’ not being good at stuff?”

“I try anyway,” Obito said. “I keep at it until it works. If I have to do it a hundred or a thousand times, then I will.”

Kakashi’s face scrunched up oddly, and it took Obito a moment to notice that it was a smile, far wider than the ones he was used to, “I know. ‘S why you’re awesome.”

“What?”

“You’re awesome,” Kakashi repeated, speaking more as if he thought Obito was an idiot instead of awesome. “You had a hard time wit’ everything and you’re still good at it. Still a better ninja.”

“Kakashi, once you get your chakra control back, you’ll go back to being the best,” Obito sighed.

“No. You’re better. Saw wha I didn’,” Kakashi said. “Saw what was wrong and did right.”

Kakashi had a funny look in his eyes, both of them.

“You okay?”Obito asked.

“Y-yeah,” Kakashi said, looking away. “Aw…damn it, Obi, I didn’….didn’t mean to show up and…an…y’know say all this.”

“I don’t mind,” Obito said, pulling Kakashi to his feet before pushing him towards the futon. “Looking for help’s not a bad thing, Kakashi. Tell you what, once you’re over your hangover tomorrow, let’s go train on chakra control. Just you and me.”

His only answer was a faint snore as Kakashi finally succumbed to his excessive drinking and fell asleep on his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi's always been good at being a ninja. I asked myself how I'd cope if the stuff I'm really good at suddenly just did not work for me, even though in my head I knew how to do it and used that as a main lens.


	7. Basics

They hadn’t talked much after Kakashi had woken up from his little episode. Obito had merely pointed the hung-over boy at his bathroom to hurl and then shower and made the most basic, non-nausea-inducting breakfast he could before they’d headed out.

Obito needed to tree climb too anyway, but more for strengthening the muscles involved than chakra. He was getting to where he could go on C-ranks again soon and he was so happy about it.

Kakashi, on the other hand, clearly needed to work on his control.

Obito winced as Kakashi’s back hit the ground with a loud crack, “Damn it, Bakashi, at least _try_ to catch yourself!”

“I am!”

“No, you’re not!” Obito said. “You know your physical reflexes are fine!” To prove it, he chucked a kunai dead at Kakashi’s heart and the boy snatched it out of the air and threw it back at his skull. If he hadn’t started experimenting with Kamui recently, that would have hurt. “See? Now why aren’t you landing properly?”

“…I’m trying for a sink or swim response.”

Obito groaned and put a hand on his face, “Kakashi, you know damn well you’re not scared of falling less than ten feet, even if it’s backwards without catching yourself. And stop punishing yourself over this!”

“I need to motivate myself somehow!”

“Your motivation is that when you do this your jutsu will start freaking _working_ again!” Obito said. “And now your motivation to stop dropping like that is that it will piss me off!”

For the rest of the day Kakashi never got more than twenty feet up the tree, but he made sure to twist mid-air and catch himself whenever he fell. Obito personally called that progress. But Kakashi, perfectionist that he was, didn’t.

“Well, maybe you can use a technique or two now,” Obito said.

“Nope. I just tried replacing myself with a rock,” Kakashi said, frustrated.

“Well…remember what Rin said? Maybe you’re just using too much chakra?” Obito asked. “Let me watch.”

The Sharingan was more for copying techniques, but sometimes it could see how they went wrong too, especially if it was something they’d already copied. It was in the way the actions in front of you didn’t match the captured memory. “Try Great Fireball, okay?”

Kakashi nodded and started going through the motions. Obito’s eyes went wide right before the technique was finished, “Shit, shit, Kakashi, too much, shit, too much!”

Kakashi couldn’t stop in time and the resulting fireball exploded. Obito tacked Kakashi through the Kamui dimension and into another clearing altogether.

“Too much chakra,” he repeated as they lay sprawled on the grass. “That’s what’s wrong. Too much chakra.”

“Noted,” Kakashi muttered, looking for all the world like he wanted to sink into the earth and die.

“But…still, it did technically work, you just overpowered it a bit much instead of way too much,” Obito added. “See, tree-climbing helps!”

“I still hate it.”

“Tough luck, buddy. Come on, let’s get lunch and then go meet sensei and Rin. Oh, same time tomorrow?”

“We’re going for hibachi, not ramen,” Kakashi decided.

“But ramen’s awesome!”

“Obito, I just fell out of a tree over a hundred times. We are getting what _I_ want.”

“Darn it,” Obito sighed. “Okay fine, Jerkashi.”

“Real funny. You should be a comedian.”

“I’m going to get the hibachi with you, okay? Stop making fun of me!”

Kakashi’s eye curved up in a grin at the response, and Obito had to admit that maybe a teasing Kakashi wasn’t so bad as a friend.


	8. Shift

It had been a few weeks and Kakashi had gotten most of his techniques working again. They weren’t working _well_ , the constant chakra overloads saw to that , but at least they actually worked when he tried to use them and Kakashi wasn’t moping all the time anymore.

And frankly his pal _not_ acting like it was the end of his world was good enough for Obito.

“I’m glad things are getting back to normal,” Rin said, smiling. “You two are pretty good for each other.”

“What?” Obito asked.

“You and Kakashi,” Rin said, looking confused. “You’re good for each other.”

Obito’s brain pretty much hit a brick wall at that point, “Well, _yeah_. We’re teammates. It’d be bad if we were _bad_ for each other.”

“Oh, um…right! It would,” Rin said, looking embarrassed. “But you’re definitely closer now, huh?”

“Well, yeah, he barely tolerated me before,” Obito said.

Rin just sighed and shook her head at him until Sensei called her over to work on her water techniques with him.

“You okay?” Kakashi asked. “Something happen with Rin?”

“Um, no, she was just talking about how she’s glad we can get along now.”

“Oh, okay then,” Kakashi said, shrugging. “Seriously, though, when are you going to fess up to her, anyway? It’s not like she’s got a crush on me anymore anyway.”

“Fess up?” Obito asked. Oh, right, Rin.

He frowned. Since he’d been back, he hadn’t really thought about asking Rin out. He’d been too relieved they were all alive and wondering how he was alive and helping Kakashi out. In fact, he’d been thinking about Kakashi a lot lately, so maybe he just hadn’t had time to think over his feelings for Rin because he’d been worried about Kakashi.

Weird. He guessed he’d been a bit over-fixated on one girl, but then she was his teammate and one of the first people to believe in him. Only now it felt…less. Maybe it was like an addiction? Okay, that was scary thought, could affection really be like that?

“Oi. Earth to Obito,” Kakashi said. “You okay?”

“Huh, oh, yeah, just thinking.”

“You know how to think? News to me,” Kakashi chuckled.

Before that would have been a biting remark, but now it sounded almost…fond. Probably because they were friends now.

“Ah, shut up, Bakashi. I’m just too glad to have you all back to think about anything else.”

“Oh.” Kakashi looked surprised. “Um…thanks?”

Obito grinned, “You’re welcome. Hey, how about we all grab ramen after this?”

“You’re worse than sensei’s girlfriend.”

“Wow, I really need to meet Kushina one of these days…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As noted in the title, this is where Obito starts unconsciously shifting his affections. It's been a few months and he's only just now starting or notice "oh, right, crush on Rin...right?" I really think a big issue with Obito (and canon-Kakashi, in regards to Obito at least) was the tendency to idolize a person and put them on a pedestal. I'm not so sure if Obito was ever so much into Rin as the idea of Rin.  
> Also, they're all young, so I see Rin able to move on from her crush on Kakashi fairly easily, especially if it's because she thinks he's happier elsewhere. She's a nice girl, it's pretty much her defining trait. Not that either of the guys has noticed yet.


	9. Masks

Obito had in fact seen Kakashi without his mask before. The whole team had, for one thing the idiot had almost drowned once—passed out from chakra exhaustion after a massive battle on a lake during the war—and Obito and Rin had alternated resuscitation efforts while Sensei had stood guard. There’d been other times too, like eating at Sensei’s house or that time Obito got in a lucky kick and really hurt his jaw.

So, yeah, Obito knew what was under the mask. It was, _surprise_ , a face. Clearly even when he’d had that stick up his ass Kakashi had been a grade-A joker in regards to that, letting everyone wonder and guess and psyche themselves out over it. But Kakashi never really _acted_ like it was a secret. If anyone ever asked why he never took it off he’d probably act surprised that they were curious at all while still not letting them know. He never acted like it was a big deal ending up unmasked around his team, though he’d usually cover up with a convenient book or piece of cloth.

Except now Kakashi was suddenly being _very_ defensive about his mask. When Gai would challenge him before and joke that he might unmask Kakashi if he won, Kakashi had usually brushed it off even if he’d work harder at winning the challenge. Now he got annoyed at Gai and usually selected challenges that _really_ disadvantaged Gai whenever it came up.

“ _Archery_?” Rin demanded. “Gai’s never held a bow before!”

“Neither has Kakashi,” Obito admitted. “But I think he might have copied some archers in case he ever had to use it. And that’s why Gai’s running a hundred laps around the village on his hands.”

“That’s just _mean_ ,” Rin said. “At least give him a lighter punishment…”

“Well…the punishment was Gai’s idea,” Obito admitted. “You know how he gets.”

“But still, Kakashi usually picks something normal when it’s his turn. Holding your breath. Chess. First to find the hellcat.”

“I know, I know,” Obito said. “It’s weird.”

“You should talk to him.”

“I what?” Obito asked.

“Talk to him,” Rin said. “You know Kakashi really well, Obito. Maybe you know what’s wrong?”

“Not really. He just gets mad whenever Gai brings up wanting to unmask him,” Obito said.

“Oh…that’d do it,” Rin said.

“What would do it?”

Rin looked like a deer facing down a wildcat. “Um…Obito…have you…erm…not seen Kakashi since we got back?”

“No. Like I said, he’s more defensive about it, and we just became pals. I don’t want to mess with that.”

“Well, then talk to him about it. I don’t really know what to say,” Rin admitted. “If he keeps being this irascible about it, it could start affecting his assignments. People don’t want to team with a teen jonin much already, a teen who’ll bite their head off is worse.”

“Um…okay?” Obito said.

.o.o.o.

At thirteen Kakashi was technically a minor, despite his jonin status that let him do thinks like get drunk and buy porn. Therefore most people didn’t bat an eye at the fact that he lived with his sensei. Obito had never minded—sensei’s house was pretty cool.

He’d slipped in under Kakashi’s radar with some help from Miss Kushina—who was as awesome as expected—and crept upstairs.

Normally surprising a jonin was a _bad_ idea. But Kakashi was an evasive pain in the neck who would run if Obito gave him warning. So an unexpected visit was the best plan, “Hey, Kaka—urk!”

Obito ducked the bright orange book that sailed at his head. “Hey! No porn attacks, jerk!” He didn’t know how Kakashi read that stuff, really. It had to be the smut, if you skipped that then it was _so boring_.

“Don’t run in here without knocking,” Kakashi said. Obito looked back over just in time to see Kakashi hike his mask over his nose. Darn it.

“Sorry, just wanted to drop in. You know, like friends do.”

Kakashi shrugged, “And you need to give me a heart attack in order to do that? Yeah, no.”

“Sorry,” Obito said. “Hey…is something…wrong? Rin and I noticed you’ve been kind of…there’s a word for it, I don’t think it’s ‘ _pissy’_ but-”

“The hell are you talking about?” Kakashi asked. He sounded honestly confused, which was weird because it was _Kakashi_.

“Well, like with Gai today. You went from pretty much teasing people about your mask to suddenly getting all…yeah, that,” Obito said, nodding as Kakashi glared at him. “Exactly that.”

“It’s none of your business,” Kakashi said.

“We’re just worried about you. I mean, Kakashi, soon none of the other jonin are going to want to work with you! You just keep going for the jugular if someone so much as cracks wise about it!”

“I have my reasons,” Kakashi said.

“Well, okay, but-”

“Just because we’re friends now doesn’t mean I have to tell you _everything_ you know.”

“I never said you did. But, you know getting so snippy only makes people more curious, right?” Obito asked. “I’m not saying you need to take off the mask or even tell me why you won’t, but come on, Kakashi, you of all people should be able to manage self-control.”

Kakashi’s shoulders slumped in that way they did whenever he was contemplating his status of containing the Sanbi. “I just…I get annoyed, and then _it_ gets loud and then I get mad. I just don’t want to take it off and it pisses me off that they want me to because they’ve let their imaginations run wild.”

“Tell me about it. ‘Oh my god, the legendary genius ninja kid Kakashi has a face!’ I mean, come _on_ , right?”

“Right,” Kakashi said.

Obito caught a slight hesitation on that answer and really, really wanted to ask what was wrong but, hey, it was Kakashi’s business. “So, yeah, anyway, want to talk about how much it annoys you so next time someone’s a nosy jerk you don’t try to eviscerate them.”

“Your imagination’s getting away with you, too.”

“Dude, have you seen the look on you…um…small exposed portion of face?” Obito asked. “You looked like you were ready to Chidori them!”

“You know, ‘Chidori’ is not a verb, Obito.”

“Ah, whatever, you know what I mean. So, anyway, next time it bugs you, you talk to me about it, okay?”

“Maybe.”

“No maybe. Yes you will. I mean, for crying out loud, Rin seems to know why-”

“Did she tell you?” Kakashi’s voice got very sharp all of the sudden.

“…No?” Obito said.

“Good,” Kakashi said. “I’m already ticked off she knows.”

“Jeez, Kakashi, we’re your friends, we’re not going to care beyond that it upsets you, stupid,” Obito said.

“Whatever,” Kakashi said. “…So, was that it?”

“Jerk. I’m trying to make you feel better?”

“No, I meant was that all you wanted to talk about!” Kakashi said, waving his hands quickly in a gesture of placation. “I was asking if there was anything else!”

“Oh! Um…no,” Obito said.

“Oh, okay,” Kakashi said. “…You know how the Sanbi thing wasn’t done right the first time?”

“What?” Obito asked.

“How the seal wasn’t originally a full host-containment seal,” Kakashi said.

“Yeah. I’m the one who had to stabilize it so you didn’t die,” Obito said. “So?”

“So Sensei had to tell me that when a Bijuu isn’t sealed properly, like in an emergency or something, it’s…obvious.”

“Huh?” Obito asked.

“It leaves marks. And I don’t mean the scars from them carving the seal into me,” Kakashi said. “Promise not to freak out?”

“swear,” Obito agreed.

Kakashi shifted before quickly lowering his mask.

It took all of Obito’s willpower not to have his eye widen or his mouth move. Along Kakashi’s jawline were five marks, five triangles. They didn’t look like they were skin, either.

“The Sanbi’s lower jaw looks like this,” Kakashi said, tracing them. “Five spikes, I mean, not like a person with…anyway, that’s why.”

“…Is this because I had to mess with the seal?” Obito asked.

“What? No!” Kakashi yelled, eyes wide. “How could you even-”

“You said it was because the seal had to be fixed, how am I supposed to know it’s not because I did something wrong-”

“Because it would have happened anyway! Improper or emergency seals leave marks, like I said,” Kakashi said. “It’s not your fault.”

“…Then why didn’t you tell me?” Obito asked. “You told Rin-”

“No, Rin found out because she’s the medic. She saw it when I was unconscious after a chakra overload,” Kakashi said. “And I don’t like that anyone knows. But…if she knows, then you definitely should get to.”

“Oh, thanks,” Obito said, grinning. “And I don’t care about it, except, you know, because it bugs you. And if you’re worried about your good looks, you shouldn’t be. I mean, the Inuzuka and some of the minor clans have face marks. Rin has face marks. No big deal.”

“..My good looks?” Kakashi asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, shut up, man. You had me worried, you know.”

“So, what, I owe you ramen?” Kakashi sighed.

“No. For this, I get pocky. Lots of pocky.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's my personal guess that hosts only have marks when exposed to excess demon chakra thru rushed or improper/experimental sealing. Hence why only Gaara and Naruto (and the Gold and Silver bros) seem to have them. Other hosts seem to have been chosen in more standard manners, like Bee after Bee's cousin failed. And yea, I know Gaara's dad gets the eye rings when he uses his powers, but Gaara's are permanent. So yeah, my theory stands.


	10. Uchiha

Obito didn’t give much thought to the clan demands that he take his eye back from Kakashi. For one, he didn’t give much of a damn about the clan and wouldn’t take back his gift to his friend for the world. Two, the clan head and his wife were being suspiciously silent on the subject, and of Obito hadn’t been Mikoto’s favorite cousin and Fugaku’s former go-to babysitter for Itachi he’d have wondered why.

But, still, it wasn’t like he was being physically put in danger. Getting told he couldn’t act as part of the clan or go in the compound wasn’t exactly a huge punishment for him. Hell, it was pretty much business as usual.

So when Kakashi tried, in his own socially-inept-to-the-point-of-being-idiotic way, to tell Obito that he wouldn’t mind losing the eye, Obito instead lost his temper.

“Fuck no!”

“Jeez, okay, calm down,” Kakashi muttered. “I was just letting you know it was okay, you know?”

“Well it’s not okay!” Obito snapped. “How could you even… _stupid_ …”

“I was just letting you know!” Kakashi huffed.

“Well I didn’t need to know that!”

“It’s your eye!”

“No, it’s _your_ eye now, I gave it to _you_ , it’s in _your_ skull!” Obito said.

Kakashi looked a bit uneasy and Obito felt something was wrong, “Kakashi…has anyone…you know, maybe told you something?”

“What?” Kakashi asked. “N-no!”

That was a yes if Obito had ever heard one. “Who?”

“…Couple cousins of yours.”

“Mikoto? Or Shisui?”

“No.”

“Well then why the hell did you listen? You know they’re like my only family members I give a damn about. Well, okay, Itachi, too, and Fugaku by virtue of being good enough for Mikoto…”

“I just wanted to give you the option.”

“If I _wanted_ to take that option I could have brought it up _myself_.”

“No you wouldn’t. You’re too nice to do that.”

Obito glared at him, “Or maybe I just want you to have it, like I said.”

“I don’t…I’m not sure I _should_ have it, though. You gave it to me when we all thought you were dying.”

“So? Doesn’t mean I regret it.” Obito smiled. “I could never regret giving something like that to someone I care so much about. It means whenever you use it, I’m helping keep you safe.”

“I’m the jonin, Obito. I’m supposed to keep _you_ safe, chunin.” Kakashi had that weird look in his eye again.

“Yes!” Obito cheered. “You are no longer denying you’re a worthy jonin! I win!”

“Wh-what?” Kakashi asked. “Jeez are you ever weird. Didn’t you used to hate that I was a jonin so early?”

“Who cares! You’re not moping about it anymore!” Obito laughed, slinging an arm around Kakashi. This was celebration worthy. “Let’s go get ramen!”

“Oh come on, Obito, we had some yesterday!”

“Which means we haven’t had any today which is a _travesty_ ,” Obito argued. “Come on, your backbone’s back, let’s celebrate!”

“I don’t think I ever lacked a spine, Obito.” Kakashi said as he let himself be steered anyway.

“Well fine, whatever the self-doubt issues were. I don’t care. Race you to the ramen stand!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obito thinks ramen is proper celebration for everything. Probably since he doesn't have parents and considers food he could microwave a good thing, and then found out there were restaurants for it and had a WOW attack.  
> Also it is my headcanon that Mikoto babysat Obito when he was little and he babysat Itachi for extra cash.


	11. Realization I: Soldiers

It had been a fairly normal mission. B-rank, protect a large area of farmland from some missing-nin from Suna that were menacing it, kill the missing-nin and mail their heads to the Kazekage if at all possible.

Normally such a mission would have been given to Suna, but they were low on funds and it was Fire Country land.

They’d spread out to keep watch. Sensei had given them some seals to alert each other with, but he a different mission, leaving them with Gai as their fourth teammate.

Obito liked Gai. The guy was straightforward, positive, and like Obito loved missions where he got to do good.

Kakashi, though, did not like Gai. Even discounting the mask thing—and frankly Obito thought Gai had learned better by now, since he never brought it up—he found the other ninja too loud. So he and Rin had taken one side leaving Obito and Gai on the other.

“I wonder why they deem these farms so important to plunder,” Gai mused. “They are not particularly large and wealthy, nor are they in some kind of tactically important location.”

“Well if they were too big and rich, they’d have hired guards sooner,” Obito noted. “But you might be onto something with the location…makes no sense.”

“They may simply be poor planners,” Gai admitted. “Or vengeful people out to cause pain for the sake of it.”

“Gah, I hate jerks like that,” Obito said.

They waited for hours. Gai did pushups and Obito played solitaire with a deck of cards he always brought on likely-to-be-waiting missions.  

“Did you hear that?” Gai asked.

“Yeah,” Obito said, quickly putting his distraction away. “I’ll check it out. I’m not back in one minute-”

“Get the others and come to your rescue,” Gai said.

“Got it in one,” Obito said, grinning. He pulled on his goggles and crept forward slowly through the trees surrounding the farm.

The opponent tried to get his blind side, but Obito had been training for weeks to counter that kind of attack. He grabbed the man’s wrist and tossed him over to his good side, into the opponent who was trying to get him over there since Obito had grabbed his pal.

Wait.

Those weren’t Suna nin. They were Grass…Obito wracked his brain to see if they were missing-ninja or not. “I think there’s been a misunderstanding.”

“No, Lord Orochimaru was quite clear,” one said.

Orochimaru? Oh shit. “What?!?”

“He said to get the Hokage’s Uchiha kid. Mokuton and Sharingan, all in one,” the other said.

Moku…oh, the branches thing. The cloned cells.

Wait, did that mean Orochimaru wanted him back? Why? He knew how to make the cells now...didn’t he? They were pretty sure he’d been the one to have Obito already…but then the guy was Sharingan-obsessed. Why hadn’t he taken Obito’s eye already?

Oh, right, combat, focus. Obito chucked some explosives at the men, using Kamui to get his hands free to do so and to start running.

Could he use Mokuton? He hadn’t really tried…this would be a good time, to, he guessed, but then any more distractions…

“Oh shit!” he went intangible again as one opponent appeared in front of his and went to stab him. “Great Fireball!”

Oh, wait, forest. That might have been a bad…nope, only hit the bad guy. Good. Running from a forest fire _and_ enemies was not a fun thought.

“How are you doing that?” one demanded as his kunai went through Obito.

Obito made sure to turn the technique off when not needed—this was not the time to discover a time limit. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

“dynamic Entry!”

“Though I think you’d have liked to know about that more. Great Fireball!” Obito said, roasting the guy as Gai jumped free and kicked the other’s skull in.

“Who are these men?” Gai asked.

“Said Orochimaru hired them,” Obito panted.

“Ah, snakes in the grass,” Gai said. “How…poetic?”

“I don’t know and I don’t care,” Obito said. “Come on, we should get back to our post-”

“Obito, Gai!” a talking pug puppy, suddenly Obito vaguely recalled Kakashi mentioning he trained ninja dogs, ran up to them. “Come on, the Suna nin attacked the other position!”

Gai scooped up the puppy and placed it on his head, “Lead on, brave canine!”

“Let’s go!” Obito said.

.o.o.o.

“Great Fireball!” was Obito’s entrance into this fray too. There was a reason the Uchiha, even one like him, considered it a classic jutsu. It was low chakra, high effect, and damn awesome to watch.

Rin kicked her opponent hard, sending him into the fireball’s trajectory as well. “What took you?”

“Crazy other rogue ninja. Tell you later,” Obito said. “Where’s Kakashi?”

“With the leader of the three,” Rin said, healing a bruise on her arm before swinging around and almost taking one of the missing-nin’s eyes out with a kunai.

“He doing okay?” Obito asked.

“Guy’s an earth user. Kakashi loves lightning. Should be fine,” she said. “But…as soon as we have these two under control, you can go check, okay?”

“Then let us reach victory!” Gai cheered, spinning quickly and bringing his foot into his opponent’s chin, rocketing the man skyward. “Primary lotus!”

“That’s going to hurt!” Obito laughed. He knew from experience—his was of practicing for the second chunin exams had been sparring with the guy.

“Obito, push him towards me!” Rin said.

“On it!” Obito said. “Dragon Fire Bullet!”

The dragon-head blasts panicked the opponent, who rushed away from where Obito was shooting even though he had probably heard Rin’s order.

“Got you now—take this!” Rin said, slamming a medical-chakra-infused hand into the man’s chest. “Obito, go!”

Obito followed her gesture, snatching up Kakashi’s puppy as he did. “This way?”

“Yeah…something smells funny, though…” the puppy said, wrinkling his nose.

“Airborn poison?” Obito asked. “Excessive smoke bombs? What’s up?”

“I don’t know,” the puppy said, rapping his head with a tiny paw. “Never smelled it before…smells actually…kinda like Kakashi after you came home…but more.”

“I have no idea what that means. After I came home?” Obito asked.

“Smell changed. Fishier,” the puppy said. “Yeah, I think that might be it…”

A fishy smell? And it was stronger?

Oh shit.

Obito pushed himself to run faster, and tripped into the wide ditch Kakashi and is opponent had been fighting in.

Oh, shit, shit, shit.

Something that woman had done had gotten Kakashi in the side _bad_ and there was creepy blue-green chakra spilling around his friend.

The Suna ninja had paused; she was giving Kakashi a wary look and seemed to be trying to appraise the situation better.

Obito wouldn’t give her that time. “Dragon Fire Bullet!”

He had to account for Kakashi being in the way, so most of the shots went wide, but the woman reacted and lunged back a bit. He quickly got between her and Kakashi.

“You okay?” he hissed.

“Physically, yeah, had worse,” Kakashi panted. “But I’m not used to something in my head going _fucking insane_ when I get this or worse!”

“That doesn’t sound okay, boss,” the puppy said.

Obito kept his eyes on their opponent, “Well, the lady’s staying back for now. What can she do?”

“Really fast. Wind blades,” Kakashi said.

“Shit, we thought she was earth.” Wind beat lightning, right?

“So did I,” Kakashi huffed.

“Chill, Bakashi. Fire beats wind if that’s what you’re worried about,” Obito said.

“Speed’s the problem. Use Kamui,” Kakashi said.

Wow, she was fast enough to necessitate Kamui even if she was in plain sight? Obito usually pulled it on people who surprised him… “Hey, wait, then she’ll hit you!”

“Then you move!” Kakashi said dryly.

“She’ll still hit you!” Obito argued. “AH!”

“Look out!” the puppy warned too late.

A chirpy noise filled the air as Obito tried to both avoid her wind sword—oh wow that was so cool, he had to copy that, yep, good—and keep Kakashi from getting hit.

Kakashi had gone under him with a Chidori. A very green-tinted Chidori. Which was now out the other side of the missing-nin’s abdomen.

“Nice,” Obito said.

Kakashi’s free hand shot up and seized his collar, “The hell was that?”

“Huh?” Obito asked. Was Kakashi’s eye—his biologically-his eye, anyway, the Sharingan looked normal, pissed, but normal—turning green? “What’d I do?”

“She was going to kill you!”

“Yeah, or you!” Obito snapped back. “Bakashi!” He swatted at Kakashi’s face, only for the green chakra to burn his hand. “Yow! Shit, that’s not hurting you, right?”

“Are you okay?’ Kakashi asked. “Damn it…”

Obito quietly kicked the dead ninja away as Kakahsi rubbed his temples and the discolored chakra receded. Kakashi was looking depressed again, so Obito quickly went for the positive, “So, cool defense mechanism!”

“What is wrong with you!” Kakashi snapped. “I said use Kamui! Why the hell didn’t you use Kamui?”

“Because I like you alive, idiot!”

“I already had to watch you die once!” Kakashi yelled.

Obito stared at him, open-mouthed. “Ka…Kakashi…”

“I watched you die once. Not again,” Kakashi said sternly. “And then I thought I killed you since you had to try and fix that seal and I didn’t know where you and Rin were when I woke up-”

“I thought you were dead too!” Obito yelled back. “So there!”

“You aren’t allowed to die! Not for me!”

“I’ll put my life in danger for whoever I damn well please,” Obito said.

“And here we go…” the puppy muttered.

“Stay out of this, Pakkun,” Kakashi said.

“Hey, leave the poor pup alone!” Obito said. “You’re the one acting like a jerk, telling me to let you die!” His hands shook. “I can’t let you die either!”

That was right, he couldn’t let Kakashi die! Kakashi mattered just as much to him as he did to Kakashi…wait…yeah, no, that was right.

“You…you just…you had me scared there,” Obito said. “I really thought you were seriously hurt.”

“Again. Had worse,” Kakashi said. “…I was worried about you too.”

It might have been both eyes being visible, but Obito suddenly placed that weird expression Kakashi’d been having now and then. He was…embarrassed?

“I just…you’re important,” Kakashi said. “And I…never mind.”

“What?”Obito asked. “Come on!”

“Oh, did Kakashi finally fess up? I was wondering which one of you would…figure…” Rin trailed off as Kakashi shot her a nasty look. “Oops.”

“Figure what?” Obito asked. “Fess…up..?”

Oh.

Wait… _oh_.

“Kakashi…is she saying what I think…”

It was just starting to click in his head when Kakashi gave him a _horribly_ panicked look. Obito barely even recognized his own technique before Kakashi vanished.

“Kakashi!”

“Kakashi likes me?” Obito asked no one and everyone.

“You…didn’t know?” Gai asked.

“I thought he might have finally told you,” Rin said, poking her fingers together.

“Boss _really_ likes you,” Pakkun said. “But he’s all weird about it.”

Obito Uchiha was not an idiot…

But right now, he really felt like one.

“I’ve got to talk to him,” he said, passing Pakkun to Rin. “I’ve got to…I don’t know.”

“We got this,” Rin said. “Anyone asks, you two were exhausted and rather than stay out in the open and risk endangering us by being caught, you hid out in your little whatever that place is until you were better.”

“Thanks,” Obito said, and stepped into the void.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mwahaha, cliffhanger, I'm so evil! Yes, most of these are self-contained, but this one's a two-parter.  
> Yeah, really neither of them was ever going to blurt it out normally. Kakashi's too emotionally messed up and Obito's still emotionally confused.


	12. Realization II: Monsters

“You can’t run away from me in here.”

“I know,” Kakashi said. He was drawn in on himself again, like they were back in the hospital that night when Obito snuck in to see him.

Obito hopped up the small stair-like cubes to the wide one Kakashi was on. “And frankly that was a _dumb_ thing to try. If you hadn’t had Bijuu chakra backing you up that technique might have _killed_ you. You know darn well most of the Sharingan techniques take more for you than me.”

“I just…had to get away.”

“From me?” Obito asked, wounded. “Okay, look, I’m sorry I sprung that question on you, but I thought you maybe-”

“I like you, Obito, a lot. Yes like that. And that’s no good,” Kakashi said.

“Make sense, Bakashi,” Obito said, sitting next to him. “I like you. Which…took me some time to figure out. As in I only managed about a minute ago. But I like you. And you like me. So the problem is?”

“Me.”

“You’re the problem? Well, I won’t totally dispute that, you had me confused as hell about what was going on in your head when you gave me those weird looks,” Obito said.

“Weird looks?” Kakashi asked, head lifting slightly out of curiosity.

“You know, the kind of happy, kind of admiring, but kind of embarrassed ones? Took me seeing both eyes at once to put it together, but I got there,” Obito said. “And that’s not what you’re talking about, is it?”

“Some of it is,” Kakashi said. “I’m not…good at emotional stuff, Obito. It took getting ungodly drunk just to ask you for help and even attempt flirting, which I-”

“Some of that was flirting?” Obito asked blankly.

“-obviously failed,” Kakashi finished. “I’m not good at nice or fun or…stuff you like. Even in my head I can’t articulate my feelings beyond ‘like’ since all I know is you make me happy and I want you around and sometimes want you all to myself. I’m pretty sure that’s not how people think about that stuff.”

“So you’re an emotional basket case. So?” Obito asked. “I kind of think the whole ninja by age five, chunin by six explains that all on its own. You’re still better than some of the rest in our age group…hell, I’m still not sure what’s up with Gai…”

“You’re an idiot.”

“And idiot you _like_ ,” Obito teased, grinning.

“In addition to my inadequacies as an emotional partner-”

“Wow, did you really just say that?”

“- I’m too _dangerous_.”

“O…kay then,” Obito said. “Kakashi, what am I?”

“…An idiot, as discussed? I don’t know, this is some kind of trick question, right?” the silver-haired teen asked.

“Ninja,” Obito said, tapping his headband. “I. Am. A. Nin-ja. I know dangerous when I see it, thank you Bakashi. You? You’re not that bad on the danger scale.”

“In case you didn’t notice, I just lost control of demonic chakra that _burned_ you,”Kakashi said darkly.

“Again, epic defense mechanism, you really should learn how to do that on command-”

“It’s not that damn easy!” Kakashi said. “It’s there. All the time. And it _wants out_.”

“So? Between me, sensei, and sensei’s sensei, I think we’ve got it pretty locked up,” Obito said. “And this isn’t even about that, is it?”

“Of course it is! I’m dangerous, I’m a…a a damn monster, okay?” Kakashi sighed. “A sacrifice so the Sanbi doesn’t run wild. I’ve talked with Kushina-san, she knows a lot about this stuff.”

“Well that doesn’t sound like the Kunshina-san I know, letting you be such a downer on yourself,” Obito said. “Kakashi, can you just answer one thing for me, and promise you’ll be honest?”

“…Fine.”

Obito swallowed, “Do you like yourself?”

“What kind of a question is that?” Kakashi asked.

“One where I get worried that you don’t know the point of it,” Obito said. “Do you like yourself as a person and a ninja?”

“I mean, I’m a good ninja-”

“No, no, I don’t care how good you are are it, _do you like yourself_ as a ninja and a person?” Obito reiterated.

Kakashi shrugged, “Does it matter? I’m good at what I do which is good for the village.”

Obito groaned. “How did sensei not fix this part of you? Kakashi, you’re more than your skillset. You’re more than just being a prodigy. You…you’re my friend, and the closest person I have and the guy I kind of like and I want you to be happy.”

Obito hugged himself, “I just…you’re really amazing, and you don’t seem to get that a lot of the time. You just seem to expect perfection from yourself and when you don’t get it, you freak out. Or when you do something you think you’re not supposed to, like liking me, you freak out.”

“I have to stay in control. Of everything. Or else…”

“What, you think we fudged that seal or something?” Obito asked. “Sanbi-kun’s locked up tighter the the forbidden scrolls in the Hokage tower.”

“The green chakra-”

“Am I the one who paid attention to the Bijuu lessons? Man this is weird. You get to use some of its chakra. Like I said, it’s why Kamui didn’t kill you,” Obito said. “If you didn’t sometimes use it the chakra would build up and start poisoning your system or something like that. And, yeah, sometimes it’ll be harder to control that chakra. But for a long time it was hard for you to control Chidori and now it’s fine.”

“Because you gave me an eye that can stay focused while using it.”

“Details.” Obito slung an arm over Kakashi’s shoulders. “Now, you want monsters, look to your left.”

Kakashi gave him a blank look.

“Yeah, me. Lab rat, got cloned Shodaime Hokage cells sewn up my right side, half a Mangekyo Sharingan—don’t you dare make a comment about giving the other eye back I swear—and possibly Mokuton which I have no clue how to use if I had and no memory of getting two of the three.” Obito smiled. “I should be dead, after all. Some days I’m not sure I’m not. Who’s the monster again?”

“You’re not a monster, Obi,” Kakashi sighed. “But you also don’t have one inside you that _wants out_.”

“I’m sure Mr. Turtle will learn to take a chill pill eventually,” Obito said. “So. Us?”

“As stated before I am emotionally inadequate as a potential boyfriend-”

“Oh, you said it, great, we’re boyfriends.”

“Will you listen?” Kakashi snapped. “I’m trying to protect you!”

Obito smiled sadly. “And I’m trying to protect you from you. Kakashi, believe it or not, you’re a good person. Sure, you’re uptight and a perfectionist and obsessed with questionable literature, but you’re a good person.”

“No, I'm not. And even if I was, you’d still be out of my league. You’re the kind of nice guy who helps little old ladies with their groceries and gets cats out of trees for kids for no reason other than it needs doing,” Kakashi said. "I’m the jackass who almost let the two of you die, and then let myself get captured-”

“ _Let_ yourself get captured? Really? You know, I saw the files. I saw what they had to do to keep you down long enough to carve that seal and make sure you didn’t commit suicide as soon as you knew what was going on. You _let_ nothing happen there.” Obito hugged himself tighter. “And frankly…I’m glad you didn’t manage to kill yourself, even with the threat. I can’t imagine a world without you in it.”

“What?” Kakashi asked.

“My cousin explained it to me once. Uchiha…when we form bonds, we mean them. And especially after the past few months, I’ve really formed a bond with you and I…I like it,” Obito said. “It feels right.”

“I don’t…I’m sorry, I don’t know if what I feel is like that,” Kakashi said.

“Do you want to kiss me?” Obito asked.

Kakashi was silent for a long time before saying, “Yes. Sorry.”

“You only say sorry of the person doesn’t want to be kissed,” Obito said, easing down Kakashi’s mask and gently pressing their lips together.

His fingertips could just feel the triangles along Kakashi’s jaw. He’d been right, they didn’t quite feel like skin, they were too rough, but they weren’t quite scaly either. More like incredibly fine sandpaper, maybe? Or slightly rough cloth? They moved with the surrounding skin, though, as Kakashi tried to deepen the kiss.

Obito pulled back and cupped Kakashi’s cheek, “See? Good looks totally intact. Wish I could say the same, really—urk!”

Kakashi pinned him down.

“ _No_ ,” the jonin said. “These are…these,” he traced the warped and stretched scars on the right side of Obito’s face. “There are mine,” he decided. “You got them over me. They’re mine, so you can’t say anything bad about them.”

“So, relationship rule number one, no saying anything really bad about yourself or the boyfriend gets tackle privileges?” Obito joked.

“…Relationships can have rules like that?”

“Seriously? Have you _not_ been paying attention to our lovesick sensei and his girlfriend? She swore if he ever took her ramen again she’d break his arm!” Obito said. “And he said if she messed up his files again he’d replace all her mission gear with kimonos. We’re totally normal compared to them!”

“I doubt either of us is in a position to judge normal…the mission. Rin and Gai. Did you just leave them?” Kakashi asked. “Are we going to be punished? Shit, you idiot, why’d you follow me in?”

“There’s the old Kakashi,” Obito chuckled. “Rin’s covering for us. You know, so we can talk things out and not maybe never look each other in the eye again.”

“Obito, double negatives cancel each other out. You just said ‘not never’ honestly, how did you pass the Academy?” Kakashi muttered. “It’s not _ever_.”

“Oh yeah. Old Kakashi’s back,” Obito said. “Still dating me though, right?”

“You do know I have no experience in that area, right?”

“Neither do I! It’ll be a blast!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we delve a bit into the boys' self-esteem issues (namely Kakashi's, the guy can carry around so much self-hate it's scary) and have them finally agree to give it a try.  
> And no, Kushina did not use any word relating to "monster" when talking to Kakashi. He totally got that part out of his own messed-up head. I see her explaining it as a burden but one that can be borne, but Kakashi being him focused more on the burden part.  
> Also we see have noted some of the effects the Sanbi has had on Kakashi: namely Sharingan and other chakra-heavy techniques don't drop him easily anymore. Since his main canon issues were stamina related and his canon control was perfect, you can see where this will start to change.
> 
> EDIT: I just realized the "scars are mine" lines were inspired when I read blackkat's "Down the rivers of windfall light." Credit where credit is due, and I'm sorry for not noticing sooner.


	13. Puppy Love

“Wait, you’re getting another dog? What wrong with lil’ Pakkun?” Obito asked.

“I plan to train multiple nin-dogs for multiple situations,” Kakashi said. “Pakkun is uncommonly intelligent and an amazing tracker, but he is small and not well-suited for combat.”

“Well, yeah, he’s a puppy now, Kakashi,” Obito said.

“Obito, he’s a pug. Pugs rarely even reach ten pounds,” Kakashi said. “Even he agrees I’ll need someone bigger.”

“Oh,” Obito said. “So…you want my help for this?”

“You’re my teammate and my…person…I…yeah,” Kakashi said.

“I like you too, Bakashi,” Obito chuckled. “So, any specifications other than ‘will grow up to be big’ or what?”

“I’ll know,” Kakashi said.

“So how do you even train a dog to be a ninja-animal?” Obito asked. “I mean, I know the Inuzuka breed theirs, but we’re going to a normal dog pound…”

“Some have latent chakra stores. Like I said, I’ll know,” Kakashi said.

“Think Pakkun will want a say?” Obito asked.

“Eh. I guess,” Kakashi rapped Obito on the head and the Uchiha felt a weight up there.

“Pakkun, did Bakashi just summon you in my hair?”

“Yes. Good thing it smells like you washed it recently,” the puppy huffed. “Huh…tea leaves…”

“It was the first shampoo on the shelf, geez!” Obito groaned.

“Anyway, we’re picking up some brothers for you today. Preferences?”

“Yeah, that they don’t think I’m food,” Pakkun said. “Otherwise I’m going to stay a head-pet.”

“Kakashi, don’t let them think he’s food,” Obito said firmly.

“You know, I _do_ know how to train ninja dogs. It’s a family talent.”

“Oh, cool,” Obito said. “That where the whole…you know, White Fang thing came from?”

“Some of it.”

Kakashi’s answer had been curt, so Obito hastily changed the subject. “So you said brothers? You’re getting more than one?”

“Was planning on two or three. Test my training abilities.”

“Huh. So we want bigger dogs, but anything else?”

“Speed.”

“…How do we test that? Make them run around?”

“Do you know anything about dogs?” Kakashi asked.

“Nope! Just wanted to spend time with you,” Obito admitted.

“Oh. Okay, fine just…check with me. There’s some physical traits that indicate general speed. Also I don’t care how their fur is, I’ll be keeping it short anyway.”

“It’s because he doesn’t even like brushing his own hair,” Pakkun said.

“Bad dog,” Kakashi muttered as they entered the pound. “We’re here to look at the puppies.”

“Oh, yes, you’re the ninja who made the appointment yesterday,” the old man at the counter said. “Same room you got your little friend from.”

“Sup, old man?” Pakkun asked. “Everyone else got adopted, right?”

“…You can talk?” the man asked. “So young?”

“Can’t all ninja animals talk?” Obito asked.

Pakkun smacked him, making his headband slip a bit. “I’m a prodigy. I was talking when I was three months old.”

“Usually takes at least a year of good training,” Kakashi said. “I was surprised when he started talking so early, too.”

“Ah well, that’s nice,” the old man said. “And yes, everyone in your room was adopted. Good year for puppies!”

“Sweet,” Pakkun said as Kakashi led them down the hall. “Kakashi, pick someone with a long tail. So I can bite it if they’re being rude.”

“No biting new partners,” Kakashi said. “Bad dog.”

“Aw, they’re so cute!” Obito said, looking over the puppy kennels. “How do we start?”

“Step one, look at the dog. Step two, see if you feel something. If you do, let me know. If not, move on,” Kakashi said, peering at a fluffy red dog.

“Smartass,” Obito complained.

“Who do you think taught me?” Pakkun asked.

“Hey, Pakkun, this guy looks like he could be your big bro!” Obito laughed, crouching in front of one kennel. “Hey there big guy!”

The big dark brown puppy looked up and wagged its tail, its long lolling out of a wrinkly mouth.

“Hey, hey, Kakashi, how about this one?” Obito asked. “He looks cool and seems nice.”

“Yo,” Pakkun said. The other dog woofed. “Hey, he’s pretty sharp, too!”

“Coming, coming,” Kakashi said. “…Yeah, okay, I can see the strong and smart, but he’s not going to be that fast.”

“Well once he can use chakra then he can be fast,” Obito said. “I mean, Pakkun shouldn’t be as fast as he is, right?”

“Got you there, Kakashi,” Pakkun said.

“Are you my dog or his?”

“I don’t know. His hair’s nicer to lie in…” Pakkun mused. “Nice and soft, not messy and spiky.”

“It’ll get spiky if I cut it again,” Obito said.

“Don’t. This is nice,” Pakkun said. “And Kakashi likes it like this, right?”

Obito could see a blush inching along the edge of Kakashi’s mask. The jonin huffed, “Bad dog. Obito can do what he likes. Yeah, okay, we’ll give this big guy a try. I also want the red and white dog on the left. He looks like he’ll be good and fast.”

“Okay, I’ll get him you get the other?” Obito said, reaching for the latch.

“Grab the paperwork too,” Kakashi advised.

“All right the…Bull,” Obito said, reading the name on the papers. “I like that. You look like a bull, big guy. Come here.”

Bull hopped right as him as the gate was opened, knocking Obito over.

“Kakashi, little help?”

“Nah, I’m taking Urushi here to the front. Figure it out,” Kakashi said cheerfully.

“Jerkashi!” Obito called after him. He managed to get his arms around the happy puppy and stagger to his feet. “You good, Pakkun?”

“Almost got motion sickness. Don’t worry, I held it for the sake of my new bed.”

“That's my hair. You have a bed. It’s on Kakashi’s desk.”

“This is my mobile bed.”

“Kakashi’s right, you are a bad dog when you’re off duty,” Obito muttered as he headed to the front. “So, Kakashi, Bull and Uruchi staying in your room too?”

“Yes. Kushina gave me plenty of carpet cleaner as a homecoming gift for them.”

“They’ll have to work hard to beat me. I was trained in two weeks,” Pakkun said.

“I’m not expecting perfection from them. They’re not all going to be prodigies like you, Pakkun,” Kakashi said. “They’re still good dogs.”

“Yeah, I’m no prodigy and I’m still a good ninja," Obito said.

“A very good ninja,” Kakashi agreed, paying for the dogs.

“Really?”

“What?”

“I’m a _very_ good ninja?”

“Did I say that?”

“Yes!”

“Huh. Must be true then,” Kakashi said. “Let’s get these two leashed before one of them pisses on us.”

“Yeah, that might ruin the date.”

“…This is a date?” Kakashi asked.

“I’m joking, Kakashi,” Obito sighed. “This was just us hanging out and getting your dogs. It’s not a date unless you buy me ramen.”

“…Will you accept sushi takeout?”

“You don’t _have_ to make it a date either.”

“Oh, okay.” Kakashi said, looking relieved.

“Besides, I’m still going to walk you home. I want to see which one of them tries to eat your stuff first!”

“Idiot.”

“Jerk.”

“I still like you.”

“Same.”

“Are we sure about not getting sushi?” Pakkun asked innocently. “I could go for sushi…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Breaking news: Kakashi is still clueless about relationships and Obito's the blind leading the the blinder.  
> I don;t think Kakashi wuld have gotten all his dogs at once. Too hard to train everyone. Pakkun seems like the most mature (and pugs can live a long time) so I made him the oldest. Bull is the big I-think-he's-a-mastiff, and Urushi is the red and white greyhound-like dog that wears bandages on his head. The other five will come later.  
> Obito's hair isn't quite as long as when he saved them with Guruguru, but it's near chin length (I've got a picture in the works). He uses it to cover his missing eye when he's out of eyepatches and doesn't have his headband. Kakashi does in fact like it.


	14. Art for Masks

Here's the scene from masks with Obito reassuring Kakashi after seeing Kakashi's new marks.


	15. Burn

Poor standing with the clan or not, Obito was an Uchiha. Fire jutsu were his bread and butter, his ramen and chopsticks, his other metaphors he couldn’t think of right now because there was an ambush happening.

Fire was hot. Fire tore down whatever was in its way if you did the job right. And as nice a guy as he was, Obito couldn’t help but feel a bit pushed when one of the clients they were escorting, a small child, was nearly decapitated. Only nearly, since he grabbed her and hopped through Kamui to the other side of the group, but still. Small child. Almost experiencing head removal.

Buttons pushed.

He glared at the attacker, a man with a broadsword.

Obito wanted him to burn.

He went to use a fire technique, probably Dragon Bullet, when something happened. The man’s arm was suddenly lit with black flames.

They didn’t look like anything Obito had ever seen. They were almost mesmerizing, even as the man screamed and dropped to roll on the ground. Kakashi had his neck slit in a second.

The ambush was quickly concluded. Rin went to check on the civilians and Obito was going to follow her, ask if the little girl hadn’t been too scared from the trip through the other dimension, when Kakashi grabbed him.

“He’s still burning,” Kakashi said.

Obito’s eye widened. The black flames were still burning, sliding over more of the corpse. “Shoot. Water Bullet!”

The water splashed over the flames only to hiss into steam as it made contact.

“It can’t be that hot. I don’t feel it from here,” Kakashi mused. “How’d you do that, anyway?”

“Me? I…I did that?” Obito asked.

“You just glared at the guy, your Mangekyo spun and his arm caught fire,” Kakashi said.

“Great. Just what the pair of us need, more unknown techniques.”

“I’ll try an earth jutsu, dump some rocks on it,” Kakashi said. “Because that does _not_ look like it’s going out any time soon.”

“I made unstoppable fire. Great,” Obito groaned. Kakashi patted him on the head with a small chuckle.

Kakashi dropped the rocks as planned and they rejoined the group. He quietly summoned Pakkun to give Obito something to clutch at.

.o.o.o.

“It’s called Amaterasu,” Jiraiya said, stroking his chin. “You’re lucky I was in town. I’ve done research on it before. It comes from one eye, usually the right, of the Makgekyo Sharingan and burns for seven days without stopping.”

“So, nothing can stop it? And how do I have it? I already have Kamui,” Obito said.

“All right, from my research and what I know from history and the Second’s notes, some Mangekyo Sharingan manifest unique techniques, which I think is what your Kamui is,” Jiraiya said. “Amaterasu and its sister technique Tsukyomi are more standard.”

“So if I have that from the right eye...does Kakashi have Tsukyomi with the left? Obito asked. "I mean he's never used it but could he?"

“Maybe. But the Sharingan is a very stress-based technique when you look at it. The Second Hokage and an Uchiha friend of his looked into it extensively. They felt many aspects are only unlocked it times of extreme stress or emotion,” Jiraiya said. “Hence the Mangekyo only usually coming when you think you’ve killed someone close to you. It’s the mental anguish and backlash at your actions that does it. You got upset and wanted to set a guy on fire and so you did. If Kakashi ever wants to super-genjutsu someone, well, we'll find out then. Comes down to the stressor.”

“Huh. My family has a kind of sucky bloodline when you look at it like that,” Obito mused. “So, Amaterasu?”

“Be careful with it,” Jiraiya said. “I have no idea if you can put it out earlier or not.”

“Great,” Obito told Kakashi. “Now we’re both burn hazards. Sensei will never let us live this down.”

“Both?” Jiraiya asked.

“The Sanbi’s chakra seems acidic when it manifests around me,” Kakashi said quietly. “It’s burnt a few people.”

“Yeah, it’s like an acid shield!” Obito said enthusiastically.

“Why do you like that idea so much? It burned you!”

“Yeah, but only a little! I was fine, and it’s _awesome_!” Obito argued. “I mean-”

“ _You’re so irresponsible_!”

“You’re too much of a worrier!”

“I’m allowed to worry about you, moron! I _like_ you being around so I’d _prefer_ you to stay in one unburned piece!”

“Which I will, without all the nagging! Geez, I’m allowed to worry about _you_ too! And you! Why are you writing?”

“Huh?” Jiraiya asked. “Oh, just inspired. Tsundere couples are all the rage right now. Might make it into the next book. Don’t worry, I’ll change names.”

“But we’re not…I mean we…we barely even _kiss_ damn it, keep us out of your smut!” Obito yelled, horrified. “You already melt Bakashi’s brain with it enough as-is!”

“My brain is not melted.” Kakashi folded his arms and sulked.

“It is when you have those damn books. I think you like them more than me some days.”

Kakashi glared at him, “Oh you do _not_ , you drama queen!”

“Oh yeah, good stuff,” Jiraiya muttered as the boys started shouting. “Might make a good beta-couple for that story…hm, that could work…”

.o.o.o.

“Sensei, Kushina says if you put Kakashi and Obito in your book she and Mikoto will put you in the eighth circle of hell.”

“What?” Jiraiya asked. “Damn it, Obito freaked and tattled, huh?”

“No, he was so rattled Mikoto demanded answers and then threatened Kakashi when her dear cousin didn’t answer,” Minato said.

“…There’s only seven circles of hell.”

“They said they’d light an eighth one just for you.”

“Yikes. Coming from an Uchiha lady and the Red-Hot-Blooded Habanero…”

“Yeah, you’re in for it, sensei,” Minato chuckled. “Good luck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mikoto is very protective of her little cousin. He's too good a potential future babysitter to lose.  
> So, yep, Obito and Amaterasu. That's going to go well...
> 
> EDIT: Fixed which eye Obito has and thus his convo with Jiraiya


	16. Dating for the Socially Inept

“What do I do. What do I _do_?”

“Mikoto, if your cousin wears a hole in the floor he’s paying for it,” Fugaku sighed. “Hell, how’d you get in here, Obito?”

“Kamui. What do I do?”

“ _Mikoto_ ,” Fugaku said insistently.

“Fugaku, go watch Itachi,” Mikoto said. “I’ll handle the crisis, dear.”

“Thanks. And you—stop pacing!” Fugaku told Obito.

“I don’t think I can,” Obito admitted as his cousin-in-law left the room. “Mikoto, what do I do?”

“Obito, Kakashi has been a gentleman and successfully asked you out after what has been, in my opinion, far too long after an initial confession,” Mikoto said. “What you _do_ is go on a date with him.”

“But how?” Obito asked. “How do you _date_?”

“Obito, you’re overthinking this,” Mikoto chuckled. “Listen to me. What do you feel when you think about Kakashi?”

“…Stuff I am not talking about with you,” Obito admitted weakly.

“Well, that’s a start,” Mikoto said, rubbing her temples.

.o.o.o.

“Are you sure he doesn’t blush that much about Obito-kun because of that trash he reads?” Kushina asked.

“I’m reasonably certain. Those books weren’t around when I was a kid and I did a hell of a lot of blushing about you,” Minato said sweetly. “Kakashi, breathe. You have finally made it to the first step. And it only took you four months.”

“Which for you is probably a good job,” Kushina mused. “I mean really, I thought you’d never manage…”

“Kushina, I love, you, but help or leave,” Minato said as Kakashi buried his face in his hands. “Kakashi, do you have a place picked out?”

“Barbeque place. Rin helped me pick.”

“I’ll have to thank her,” Minato sighed. “Because if you hadn’t done that we might have some issues. Now, casual?”

Kakashi blinked. “What?”

Kushina smacked her forehead. “He’s all yours, honey.”

.o.o.o.

“What do you mean casual?” Obito asked.

“Is the restaurant a…casual place? Somewhere you could just walk into? No dressing nice?” Mikoto asked.

“Well, I’d like to think I tried to dress nice for a date.”

“No, does the place itself have a dress code?” Mikoto asked. “Like, formalwear only?”

“Oh! No, I don’t think so,” Obito said.

“All right, so brush your hair, wear a clean eye patch or cover that side with your bangs, no ninja gear _at all-_ ”

“Why the emphasis? I know that.”

“I didn’t,” Mikoto muttered. “Wait staff freaked out over my ninjato.”

“….Fugaku proposed right there, huh?” Obito asked, smirking.

“He says he was close to it,” she admitted. “Just act like you would if you were eating dinner with your team, just that there’s only Kakashi.”

“…Which is totally different from eating with my team.” Obito observed.

“I’m saying act normal, Obito.”

.o.o.o.

“I know that’s an odd thing to tell you, Kakashi-” Minato began.

“Yeah, normal and I have never really got on, especially lately,” Kakashi admitted. “And _that’s_ why I’m nervous.”

“What? You think Obito won’t like that? Kakashi, he likes you,” Minato said. “Trust me, I know what it looks like when someone likes someone and he likes _you_. And you’re not that strange—stop giving me that look right now.”

Kakashi continued with the look, leaned back, and folded his arms. “Sensei. We both know he’s too good for me.”

“No, but I do know if you tell him that he might try and beat you up,” Minato said. “Nice try.”

“It’s true.”

“Where did this lack of self-esteem come from, Kakashi? Where’s that determined jonin, huh?”

“Being a jonin doesn’t help with dating.”

“No it doesn’t. But you know what? If you chicken out, you’ll hate yourself for it,” Minato said. “And just think how said poor Obito will be if he’s stood up…”

Going by the look on Kakashi’s face, that did it.

.o.o.o.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

“You, um, look nice,” Obito said.

“Thanks. Kushina made me brush my hair. New shirt?”

“Yeah.”

They sat down and tried to look at their menus.

“This is awkward—not _you’re_ awkward, I’m awkward, you’re fine,” Obito said. “I mean you’re _doing_ fine, not that you’re fine looking, not that you aren’t, and…dang it.”

“It’s nothing…not that _you_ are nothing or…now I’m doing it,” Kakashi sighed.

“Okay, cards on the table? You’re freaking amazing and I’m still stunned you even like me, much less like me like me,” Obito admitted. “I mean, I’m-”

“One of the most loyal people in existence as well as one of the nicest and surprisingly intelligent and creative.”

“Surprisingly?” Obito asked dryly.

“Well, you were almost dead last.”

“Just you wait, Jerkashi, one of these days I’ll…oh, hi, I’d like a water and some of the teriyaki mix, please,” Obito said to the stunned-looking waitress.

“Pork,” Kakashi said. “With noodles. And juice.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Obito admitted.

“What? Dinner?” Kakashi asked.

“No. Acting like idiots. I mean, okay, yes, normal for me, _sometimes_ , but you? Not so much.”

“Well I don’t know what I’m doing either,” Kakashi said.

“So…just go with it?” Obito offered.

“Yeah, okay,” Kakashi agreed. “…It’s okay to kiss after the first date, right?”

“We’ve already kissed, dummy.”

“That was months ago.”

“Then why are we waiting until _after_ the date?” Obito asked brightly. “Should take them a while to get the food…”

“Obito, I like your thinking,” Kakashi said, leaning over the table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Kakashi's Kakashi and Obito never really had parents, I can see this being a thing they'd have to go to their surrogate families (or in Obito's case, favorite cousin he's currently not supposed to call family but does anyway and Fugaku casually looks the other way) with. I can see them asking almost the exact same questions, hence cutting between the two. I can also see them both being nervous, then snarky, then realizing they're being idiots.  
> Next time we get to see Rin helping out in getting them to this point and what she thinks about all of it, since really I've neglected her.


	17. Rin is the Best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Rin has way too much patience and also the most sense

Wow. They finally noticed. Rin smiled as the boys came out of the Kamui dimension, Obito grinning widely at Kakashi and Kakashi… _wow_. Blushing. She could see it over the mask. Nice.

Rin was glad that was finally out of the way. She’d been ready to put chakra-draining seals inside a closet and then lock them in until they fessed up. Kushina and Mikoto were even ready to back her up there. It had been getting ridiculous.

But nope, they hadn’t needed her help at all.

.o.o.o.

It took Rin about two days to revise her idea of Obito and Kakashi being able to work this out themselves. Two days was also coincidentally how long it took them to get back to the village. It seemed that outside of a mission situation Kakashi suddenly didn’t know how to act around his teammate and Obito was barely faring better.

“Rin, how do I talk to Kakashi?”

“Do what you’re doing right now, but to him instead of me,” she sighed, shooting Obito an incredulous look.

“…I don’t want to mess up,” he admitted, rubbing his head in his usual “aw shucks” fashion. “I want to do it right, you know!”

Rin smiled. Obito could be really adorable when he was confused. “It’s really not as hard as you’re making it, I promise.”

“You sure about that?” he asked weakly.

“One hundred percent,” she promised.

“Um…Rin? You’re not…mad at me, right?” he asked.

“For what? Not knowing how to talk to someone after confessing? I mean, it’s your first time doing it, I guess I can’t be _that_ annoyed…”

“About it being Kakashi.”

“Oh,” Rin said. “Not really, no. Things changed when we thought you were dead. Besides, when you came back, I’d have need to be blind to not see how you two felt about each other.”

“What?” Obito said. “Wait…when you said we were good for each other?”

“Yep.”

“You meant…?”

“Yep.”

“Okay then,” Obito said. “Are you some kind of oracle or something?”

“Not that I know of,” Rin snickered. “Seriously, it was obvious to anyone with social skills. Sensei knew too!”

“Well, no _wonder_ Kakashi and I were confused! We don’t even have one full set of social skills between us!” Obito joked.

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Rin snickered. “Okay, well, _maybe,_ since Kakashi in particular is very socially behind but I can’t really hold it against either of you, given your lives.”

“So…what do you mean things changed when you thought I was dead?” Obito asked.

“Well…I guess my crush on Kakashi was really just a crush. I didn’t really know what made him tick, not that anyone else barring maybe Sensei did. I guess I liked how cool and mysterious he seemed but…I didn’t really know him. Turns out the guy’s kind of a dork about a _lot_ of things.”

“Especially things involving interacting with his friends,” Obito snickered. “Yeah he’s really not as cool as he acts but…I kind of like that.”

“But we both agree the orange books are a menace.”

“Oh, definitely. They’re really not that well-written either. I like my comedy manga better than most of them, I mean really, even that one about schoolkids fighting demons who wanted to infiltrate their academy had more characterization than the Icha-Icha I looked at.”

“Wait, you actually read one?” Rin snickered.

“Just to see why Kakashi liked them! I’m guessing it’s the sex stuff, since the rest is really just there to get to that stuff,” Obito mused.

“Oh my god, the great Kakashi Hatake, addicted to _porn_? You can _have_ him, Obito!” Rin laughed.

.o.o.o.

“They’re _adorable_!” Rin cooed as Kakashi introduced her to his newer dogs.

“You only say that because they’re not piddling on _your_ carpet,” Pakkun grunted from his nest in Obito’s hair. “Smells something awful when they do it when the guys are out. I scold them up and down, but pups just don’t have that kind of control.”

“Play nice, Pakkun,” Kakashi reprimanded calmly as he grabbed Urushi to stop the puppy from lunging after a squirrel.

“Whatever,” the pug grunted.

Obito reached up and gently rapped the little guy on the head, “That wasn’t very nice.”

“You’re supposed to be on my side. You’re my bed.”

“Real funny, buddy,” Obito huffed.

“Wait, wait, wait, I thought Pakkun was _your_ dog?” Rin asked Kakashi, grinning.

His visible eye narrowed slightly at Pakkun as he replied, “So did I.”

“Pakkun, you’re making Kakashi feel bad. Say you’re sorry,” Obito instructed.

“Kakashi, sorry that I like your boyfriend better than you.”

Instead of getting annoyed at the dog, Rin watched as Kakashi stiffened at the word “boyfriend” while Obito went tomato red. Maybe they weren’t quite used to it yet…

Pakkun gave her a longsuffering look that clearly read “see what I put up with?”

The bigger puppy put his paws on her legs, distracting her. “And who’s this strong guy?”

“Bull. I think he’s Obito’s too,” Kakashi said, clearly intent on entering a sulk by now.

“Oh come on, Kakashi!” Obito said.

“Yeah, no. Maybe you should split a room with them, too.”

“ _Kakashi_!”

Rin started laughing. They were more adorable than the puppies!

.o.o.o.

“Rin, help.”

“What is it this time?” she asked, not even looking up from the filing cabinet. How Kakashi broke into hospital records without an admin at least drawing blood was beyond her…his version of Kamui was different from Obito’s right?

“I want to ask Obito on a date.”

“It helps to be where Obito is if you want to do that.” This was getting ridiculous, and anyone could tell by how she was automatically going for the sarcasm.

“Look, there are a lot of variables to this-”

“Oh, gods, Kakashi, no,” she groaned. “How many times do I have to tell the two of you _to not overthink this stuff_?”

“Wait, you tell Obito this stuff too?” Kakashi asked.

“Yes,” she said. “I’m going to start charging you boys at this rate.”

“How much?” Kakashi asked.

“Wrong. Answer,” Rin sighed. Of course Kakashi would take it like that…

“I just want your advice on a good place to take him.”

Okay, she could do this.

.o.o.o.

Rin arrived at work the next day to find a bouquet “for the best friend in the world” and a coupon book “for helping me and Kakashi—apparently mostly Kakashi—with this stuff.”

She flipped through the coupon book. Free passes on them interrupting her future dates, teasing her crushes, and plotting her crush’s demise like the over-protective pseudo-brothers they were.

….Gods help her future boyfriend or girlfriend when she ran out of the coupons, though.


	18. Taller

“Hang on a second,” Obito said. “Kakashi, quit slouching.”

“Hmm?” Kakashi asked, glancing up from his book.

“Slouching. Stop,” Obito said, walking over and grabbing him by the shoulders. “Stand up straight.”

“Obito, what are you doing?” Rin asked, looking over from her card game with Asuma and Genma.

“He is obviously correcting Kakashi’s posture,” Gai said. “It does need work.”

“Nuh-uh. Checking,” Obito said as Kakashi finally cooperated. He went to look him in the eyes and…oh _hell no_. He had to _look up_ a bit. “You’re taller than me!”

“He is?” Genma asked.

“Obito, it’s the hair. It’s always the hair,” Rin said. “That stuff adds like six inches.”

“So happy to hear my hair declared ‘stuff,’” Kakashi said, leaning back down against the wall and trying to pull his book up again.

“No, no, hey, I want to be sure!” Obito said. “Do you have to look down to meet my eyes or not, jerk?”

“ _Jerk_?” Kakashi demanded, making Obito grin apologetically.

“No, no, Obito’s right, Kakashi’s like...maybe a finger-width taller, if we go by eye level,” Asuma said.

“What, really?” Rin asked.

Obito nodded, sighing. Kakashi had always been the short one, being the youngest of their team. He’d only been with them in the academy for a little bit before going to the graduating class and getting his headband all at age five, chunin at six. He’d only been on their team for the chunin exams to weed out foreign ninja, because no one expected someone that young and tiny to be a chunin already. So he’d always been smallest.

And now suddenly he was _tall_?

“Are we sure though?” Gai asked. “Kakashi may simply have a higher eye line due to facial structure…”

“Hmm…boys, go soak your heads. We need your hair flat,” Rin said.

“Just use something straight and press down!” Kakashi complained. “I’m not drenching myself for this…”

“Fine, fine, stand side by side,” Asuma sighed, pulling out one of his trench knives. “Gai, pass me a pencil.”

“Are we sure we should mark on the walls? This is a public space,” Gai cautioned.

“Hence using a pencil,” Asuma said. “Okay, Obito…and Kakashi.”

Obito was kind of surprised how much hair got pressed down on Kakashi’s head. He knew it was relatively loose, he liked playing with it, but seeing a section pressed flat to Kakashi’s skull looked weird.

“Okay, away from the wall, guys,” Rin said.

“Yep!” Genma declared, peering at the marks. “Kakashi’s almost a full centimeter taller right now!”

“Aw, our little runt’s growing up,” Asuma laughed.

“Careful, runts can be the meanest of the litter” Genma added as Kakashi’s eye narrowed.

“I suggest not pushing him too far…” Gai warned.

“Too late,” Kakashi said bluntly.

Genma blanched and backed away from the jonin, “Oh come on…”

“Leave him alone, Kakashi,” Rin cautioned. “Come on, just be glad you’re starting to get tall, finally.”

“Did _everyone_ think I was short or something?” Kakashi demanded.

“…And skinny. Really just on the small side in general,” Gai admitted. “Which always made how hard you hit very impressive!”

“Pretty much,” Rin agreed.

Kakashi groaned and walked out, knuckles white against his orange book, “Great. Thanks everyone. Always wanted to know that.”

Obito just sighed. Why did Kakashi have to be taller than him now? And upset about previously being short?

.o.o.o.

“So was it really that important to you?”

Obito jumped. “Gah! Kakashi! Hey, appearing randomly is _my_ thing now, not yours!”

“Me being taller. Is it…important or something?” Kakashi asked, shutting the window behind himself.

“Huh? I don’t know, I just liked it, was used to it,” Obito said. “It’s not like…threatening _us_ or anything, if that’s what you mean.”

“Why get used to it?” Kakashi said. “It’s height and we’re young. It changes.”

“I don’t know, I just did,” Obito said. “Seriously, it’s me, not you.”

Kakashi huffed and flopped on the couch next to him, “And why did you all make such a big deal out of it anyway?”

“Because you used to be short and now you’re not.”

“I wasn’t _short_.”

“You were, really. And skinny. You’re still pretty skinny. Seriously, is your muscle lean by nature or something?”

Kakashi rolled his eye, “And this is something you concern yourself with?”

“Dude. You read Icha-Icha. They have _pages and pages_ of physical descriptions.”

“Uh huh, and pages and pages of sex and plot, what’s your point?”

“There’s no plot in those books!” Obito argued. “The closest I found in the one I read was where Masamu was going to get any! And given the series, I knew the answer was _yes_!”

“That’s because you _skimmed it_ ,” Kakashi argued.

“Dude, you read _trash_ , that’s cool, just admit—ow!” Obito yelped as Kakashi slammed a pillow into his head. “Kashi!”

He sulked, “That’s another reason I don’t like you taller than me, getting glared up at was bad, but down to is way scarier.”

Kakashi didn’t stop glaring, but he did stop looking down at Obito and redirected his gaze at the wall. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“Yeah, probably.”

Kakashi twitched, “You’re being ridiculous…and you know it?”

“Yeah, I’ll get over it once I’m used to it, duh,” Obito said. “Seriously, Kakashi, it’s just one of those things, you know?”

“No.”

“Oh,” Obito said. “Well it is. No worries. Promise.” He leaned over into Kakashi’s space, “So, we good?”

“…You’re an idiot,” Kakashi declared, throwing an arm around his shoulders. “But my idiot.”

“Good to know,” Obito snickered. “Besides, you’re not always going to be taller than me.”

“Stop talking.”

“Stopping talking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea where this took place other than it was a ninja hangout. Also I generally see Kakashi as being taller than Obito as an adult, since he just seems tall in general in the series. 
> 
> As for Kakashi's age an the exam blathering, canon contradicted itself when we got to Obito's flashbacks, which indicated Kakashi took the chunin exams with Obito and Rin. This makes no sense since they are all about the same age and Kakashi canonically became a chunin at the age of six and graduated the academy at age five, meaning he probably was only with Obito in classes for a short time too--Obito graduated the academy at nine and got chunin at eleven. There is quite literally no way, given how they are within a year of each other, that Kakashi was not already a chunin before Obito even graduated the academy (my guess is Kishimoto forgot because he was trying to push the Naruto and Sasuke parallel too hard). Hence my new headcanon that he was actually already a chunin by then and hidden villages sometimes send younger chunin into the exams posing as genin to help their teams along.


	19. Slip I: Outburst

The mission was going all right until then. Kakashi had just speared the main enemy ninja through the chest with an excellent Chidori while Obito, Rin, and Hayate kept the others away from him so it didn’t get too dicey. No real trouble.

“Why do they want this little outpost, anyway?” Obito complained. “I thought the war was winding down!”

“There are plenty of reasons,” Kakashi replied, extracting his hand from the corpse and preparing to seal it. “Spying, sneak attacks, scouting.”

“Eh, I guess— _shit_!” Obito yelped as a second team of Cloud ninja showed up. “And reinforcements? They really want this place!”

“Well, this one’s sealed so they’re also going to aim for me to get his body back. We should use that,” Kakashi said, storing the scroll at his hip.

“So it’s six on four, that’s not so bad,” Hayate said as they regrouped.

“Either of you two need a fix-up?” Rin asked.

“Good,” Obito said and Kakashi echoed him.

They re-engaged and things were still going all right. Kakashi took a strike to the back but it wasn’t _that_ bad, just an annoyance, really…

Then the ground gave way underneath him and Obito and ever since Kanabi Bridge Kakashi had _hated_ big earth techniques-!

Obito used Kamui to let them touch down safely. “You okay?”

“Fine,” Kakashi said tersely. He could feel blood dribbling down his back from the wound and it only irritated him further.

“Kakashi, green.”

“What?” Kakashi asked.

“Green!” Obito snapped, waving in his general direction.

Kakashi realized he was starting to get wrapped in the acidic chakra. “Damn it…give me a minute here-”

“Can you keep yourself safe if I head back up to help?” Obito asked.

“Of course.” The one good thing about the monster sealed in him was that it trying to come out was an excellent defense mechanism.

“Great,” Obito said, jumping to head on up.

There was a flash and for a moment all Kakashi could hear was Obito’s started yelp.

His mind fit the pieces together before his vision cleared—lightning technique, unusually silent, powerful—and he saw Obito hit the ground, spasming.

The stress and pain and already slipping control started to conflate _now_ with _then_ and _no, no, **no**_ not again, not Obito, not again!

Kakashi saw red.

.o.o.o.

The ninja who had attacked Obito was a fairly powerful Kumo jonin, specializing in lighting techniques and genjutsu. Neither as of much help when faced with an utterly furious jinchuuriki bearing down on you.

Kakashi’s style was inelegant, any sort of refined reflexes forgotten in blind rage. It didn’t matter, while his initial strikes were sloppy and easily blocked, the corrosive chakra surrounding him punished his opponent for every one of those blocks.

A chirping noise filled the air and a sickly acid green Chidori was rammed through the jonin’s chest, killing him.

Another Kumo ninja, likely trying to step in and help, was pounced on next. This one was weaker, so Kakashi merely tore his head clean off before jumping out of the pit, tossing the skull aside as he landed.

“Shit,” Rin swore upon seeing her teammate. “Hayate, go look for Obito down there!”

“Right,” the special jonin agreed warily, heading down.

Kakashi didn’t hear the, more intent on killing the remaining opponents, barehanded if need be. A normal, thinking Kakashi would have used wind techniques to counter their lightning, maybe some fire for cover.

This Kakashi just lunged, tearing apart whatever he could get his hands on. It didn’t take long for the area to become painted in blood.

But Kakashi wasn’t used to putting this much strain on himself, and he was wearing thin.

Something asked him if he’d like more, just a little more…

He didn’t know. He wasn’t entirely capable of judging what he’d need…but more might be bad…maybe…maybe…

“Kakashi!” Rin shouted. “Snap out of it, we need to get back! Obito needs medical attention and so do you!”

Obito…wait, was he not dead yet?

Kakashi turned to see Hayate haul Obito out of the pit.

Wait. This wasn’t the bridge mission…this wasn’t…

Kakashi grabbed his head, slowly coming back to himself, “I…what…what just…”

“I think you need some rest,” Rin said firmly.

“I…I think so too,” Kakashi agreed before his world spun and he collapsed.

.o.o.o.

“What the hell was that?” Hayate asked. “The Sanbi trying to get out?”

“I…I think we didn’t quite get to that,” Rin said. “Just Kakashi being reckless with its power. Come on, let’s go.”

“Think we can heal one of them enough to walk?” Hayate asked, adjusting Obito in his arms.

“I’d rather not. Come on, we should run into Leaf scouts if we go this way,” Rin said, managing to pick up Kakashi’s lanky frame and start jogging.

 

  
[Drops in the Bucket: Losing Control](http://kereea.deviantart.com/art/Drops-in-the-Bucket-Losing-Control-551286461) by [Kereea](http://kereea.deviantart.com/) on [DeviantArt](http://www.deviantart.com)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I know, short chapter, have a picture to make up for it! Slip pt2 is a lot longer, but I felt they should be separate bits.


	20. Slip II: Nightmares

 

_He was drowning._

_Kakashi wasn’t stupid, he started swimming towards the surface, he could see it-_

_He was jerked short. Looking back, there were chains. Chains going down._

_He struggled against them but suddenly they yanked him back, back towards…no, no, not what was in the cage-!_

Kakashi bolted upright in a panic. Hospital, his mind supplied for the surroundings. Konoha, home territory, _safe_.

“Well look who’s awake.”

Kakashi turned to see Kushina smiling wearily at him. “What happened?”

“Burnt yourself out,” she said. “You had a bit of a slipup. Nothing too bad, didn’t even try to hurt Rin and Hayate even when they were right there. Though you did do quite a number on the Cloud ninja.”

Slipup?

His blood ran cold. “I lost control?”

“Not entirely, but you definitely let the Sanbi have a bit more leeway than is a good idea, from the reports,” Kushina said. “Strained your chakra system along with the rest of your body. You blacked out when the rush wore off.”

“Where’s Obito?” He remembered, remembered it making him see red, the lightning arcing through the Uchiha and him not getting up after-

“Fine, though the shocks did a bit of a doozy to his muscles, especially the prosthetics. Medics want him unconscious for a few more days so they’re sure everything’s in working order.”

Kakashi nodded. It was slowly coming back, crisp clear images all nicely recorded by his Sharingan of what happened when he was…not all there.

“Are you okay?” Kushina asked. “You’re spacing out a bit. Do you need more sleep?”

“Yeah, probably,” Kakashi agreed, trying to ignore the images. “Maybe I could eat something after I wake up again but…I’m tired.”

Kushina ruffled his hair, “All right. I’ll let Minato and the staff know you were up for a bit but wanted to sleep.”

“Thanks,” Kakashi said, rolling onto his side.

The images were getting stronger. The Cloud ninja’s head he’d torn off was particularly prevalent. He’d seen plenty of decapitations, hell, he’d committed plenty personally, but this was somehow much worse, and he had every detail neatly recorded. The way the spine had ripped was particularly unpleasant.

But it was like watching a movie, he had no idea what was going through his head when he’d been like that, it was like watching a movie about someone _else_. And it scared him.

.o.o.o.

Kakashi ended up not sleeping, only lightly dozing. He was too anxious to sleep.

He lied when his sensei came by with food, claiming to have napped. He didn’t need Minato to worry more than he probably already was.

He asked when he could go home, made up something about checking on the dogs. Minato probably saw through it, he knew Kakashi and Obito always left the dogs in perfectly self-sufficient states, but he agreed the hospital really couldn’t do anything for Kakashi and familiar surroundings might be better for his mental state.

Kakashi just hoped his own bed would be better for sleep.

.o.o.o.

He still couldn’t sleep.

He’d close his eyes and there’d be _blood and acid and destruction_. He’d let himself drift and _drowning_. He couldn’t go see anyone because it’d be obvious he was not well, not right. _Wrong_.

He missed Obito.

He didn’t feel wrong around Obito, didn’t feel like a monster anymore. But he didn’t usually feel _this_ much like a monster with Obito gone, either.

What had gone wrong? Was it just a combination of too much bad stuff going on at once? What made him misstep?

_Chidori through the chest, almost made unconsciously, he’d have tried to shove a bare hand through, and he knew it. It’d punch through, burn through, eventually._

Was it what happened to Obito? He couldn’t be trusted if an ally getting hurt led to a rampage.

 _Two of them had tried to jump him at once, he’d thrown one into the other and then pounced on both, bones shattering as he landed, corrosive chakra burning through their skin as they screamed_.

It was like he’d stopped being a ninja and started being some...some _other_. And it was horrifying. He never wanted it to happen again.

.o.o.o.

The worst moments were when he gave in to not sleeping and just _thought_.

Because then he could hear the Sanbi. Mocking him. Trying to convince him to let it out.

He didn’t listen, refused to listen. He knew what it wanted, to rampage and kill everyone and he wouldn’t let it but what if it stopped being up to him?

What if he wasn’t strong enough to stop it?

.o.o.o.

Obito was disappointed when Kakashi didn’t come see him before he was discharged. Minato-sensei said he hadn’t been feeling well and just wanted to go home, and Obito could totally understand that. Still disappointed, though.

Obito unlocked the door and slipped inside, “Kakashi?”

“Bedroom.”

Obito looked over to see Pakkun pulling himself out of a dogpile on the couch. “Surprised he didn’t hear me...”

“Give him a minute. He’s not…okay,” Bull suggested.

Obito swallowed and headed for Kakashi’s room, “Kakashi, I’m home!”

For a minute there was nothing and then Obito heard his boyfriend hurry and grab the door.

He smiled when Kakashi opened it, “Hey, Kashi, you miss me—urk!”

The silver haired ninja’s face was buried in Obito’s shoulder and he was practically clinging to him.

“So that’s a yes, huh?” he teased, trying to ease Kakashi off just a little so he could move. “Hey, come on, what’s wrong?”

Kakashi’s grip on his shoulders briefly tightened, but he didn’t say a word.

Obito remembered Rin telling him what happened after he got zapped and realized Kakashi probably hadn’t had a good time the last few days even if he’d been awake for them. He remembered how he felt when they first came back to Konoha when Kakashi got the dumb turtle in him, how worried he’d been. “Hey, it’s okay.”

He felt more than heard Kakashi take a very deep breath. “Hey, good job. Think you can get over to the bed? I kind of want to lie down.”

They’d never really shared a bed before, but they’d been sharing the apartment for a little while now so Kakashi was probably used enough to Obito being in his space to allow it.

Kakashi pulled back and Obito finally got a good look at him. There were deep shadows under his visible eye. The mask was off and the five triangles stood out even more than usual against gaunt cheeks.

“Baka. Forgot to eat, did you?” Obito asked, poking one of those cheeks, annoyed at how hollow it looked.

Kakashi looked slightly baffled before shrugging.

“Come on, we’re getting some food in you before we take a nap,” Obito said, dragging him back out to the living area. “Think we’ve got some of that instant ramen Kushina’s always bequeathing to people. I mean, it’s a good idea, you know, it’ll keep so when you get back from a mission and all your food’s spoilt you can eat that so you have energy to get groceries.”

He was rambling, but Kakashi didn’t seem to be annoyed by it.

“Wonder how they made it so it takes exactly three minutes to cook. What do you think?” Obito asked.

“They probably just got lucky,” Kakashi said.

“Ah, he speaks!” Obito laughed. “Had me worried there.”

Kakashi shrugged again, “I was worried too.”

“I’m fine. Just needed to sleep it off,” Obito said. “You’re the one who needs to sleep now, though. Seriously, is that a serious shadow under you eye or did Shisui break in and doodle on your face with a black marker?”

“…Shadow,” Kakashi said, accepting his noodles once they were done.

“Then you need to sleep,” Obito said.

“Can’t.”

“Why not? Surprised you haven’t collapsed yet.”

“I…I remember. What I did.”

“What?” Obito asked.

“I mean, I was out of it but my…your… _the_ Sharingan was still active,” Kakashi said. “So I know what happened and…”

“Oh,” Obito said. That was one of the downsides of the eyes, they had a bad habit of doing a great job recording stuff you’d rather not recall. “…Want to talk about it?”

“It…it was awful. I, when I was like that, all I remember is wanting them all dead,” Kakashi said. “I just wanted to kill them all. And…I did.”

Oh shit. He knew that look. That was the “ _I’m a monster and hate myself, and you should hate me too”_ look. “Well, good job. We were going to kill them anyway, after all.”

“Obito-”

“We’ll work on the control,” Obito said. “I mean, no offense, but you don’t actually practice using that power so…yeah, we should practice. In a controlled environment. And yeah, it wasn’t great that it happened but…do you remember what I did to the Mist ninja?”

“What?” Kakashi asked.

“The Mist ninja. When…” Obito gestured vaguely at Kakashi’s chest, “ _that_ happened?”

Because he did, roots springing from the ground haphazardly, impaling everything but Kakashi and Rin from all angles. No finesse, almost no control, with a veritable sea of blood as a result.

Kakashi frowned, seemed to think about it, and then nodded.

“See? And I haven’t been practicing Mokuton like, _at all_ ,” Obito said. “So yeah, we both need to practice.”

.o.o.o.

Kakashi sighed and ate some of his ramen to buy time for a response.

How did he put it all into words? _I don’t feel like a monster around you_. Yeah, because he really needed Obito worrying over him _more_.

“I…guess we do need to train the new stuff,” he agreed. Kushina had offered to help him learn to use the Sanbi, but he’d been more concerned with keeping it locked up…maybe it would be a good idea to go to her. Maybe.

“Yep,” Obito said, chuckling ruefully. “So, I vote a nice nap, then training. My room or yours?”

“Yours,” Kakashi decided, glad Obito didn’t make him ask if they could stay together for the moment. He might not sleep, but he’d know where Obito was at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a three-parter! Sorry if that's evil! But these issues don't go away all at once!  
> I love to hear what you think!


	21. Slip III: Recovery

  Obito felt like they’d lost all the progress they’d made. Kakashi was back to quietly beating himself up and Obito had no clue what to do about it.

 He hated it. Hated the self-loathing just _lingering_ in Kakashi’s eye.

 Despite their agreement, Kakashi hadn’t been to see Kushina yet. Obito wondered if he was scared.

 It was like living with a zombie. Kakashi wouldn’t eat if Obito didn’t make anything and generally just stayed lost in faraway thoughts. Kakashi only went out with him and only to the training grounds and back. If Obito tried to detour to a shop or restaurant the idiot would just use a body flicker to head on home.

 Kakashi wasn’t sleeping well either. Obito often woke up to Kakashi rummaging in the bathroom or pacing the hall or even waking up with a half-shout. He seemed to sleep better when they were together but he never asked Obito if they could. Obito just started going into his room to do it instead.

 It was really, really worrying him. Something was going on in his Hatake’s head and he had no idea what it was. He didn’t know if it was the Sanbi doing something or Kakashi was doing it to himself or what.

 “Come on, I want to train,” he said, tossing Kakashi his shoes.

 Today, though, he had a plan. A plan that hopefully would end with Kakashi still speaking to him…or at least not speaking even less than he currently was.

 “You’re doing better with Mokuton,” Kakashi said quietly as they headed out the door.

 “Yeah, but I’m still not doing well with it. Totally not risking it on a mission yet,” Obito said.

 “You’ll get better.”

 “So will you,” Obito said, looping an arm around his shoulders. It would prevent him from running. Not that Obito couldn’t give chase with Kamui.

 Kakashi made a noncommittal noise.

 “Come _on_ , Bakashi,” Obito said, pressing a quick kiss to Kakashi’s hair. “Let’s go!”

 “We’re going, we’re going…” Kakashi sighed.

 He didn’t even pull a book out to ignore Obito properly. Something was so very wrong here.

 “Look I just…you’re being a shut in. Not healthy,” Obito said. “Got to keep your skills sharp, jonin!”

 Kakashi made a low noise that sounded like a scoff.

 “If you think I’ll get bored with doing all the talking you are very wrong,” Obito said as they entered the training grounds. He sure hoped this worked. “So, my plan is I work on the basic ‘shoot roots at stuff’ stuff and you can, I don’t know, try to make the acid armor show up on purpose-”

 “ _Hey_ , that’s a great name for it!” Kakashi went rigid as Kushina dropped down from some trees. “All right boys, I’ve been stalking you for days and Kakashi, we are going to do some practice! No saying no, mister!”

 And she’d nicely made it look like Obito hadn’t planned this, sweet. “Um, okay. Sorry, Kakashi, wife of the Hokage and all…think she outranks me…wait she’s a jonin she already does…”

 “Um…” Kakashi said. “All…right…”

 “Great!” Kushina said, stealing Kakashi from his side. “Obito, go do whatever. I'll give Kakashi back later.”

 “Yes ma’am.” She was really playing this to the hilt. Awesome.

.o.o.o.

 Kakashi was relatively sure this was a setup. Kushina did not make a habit of hanging out in trees. Minato-sensei? Sure. Asuma or Gai? Entirely possible. But not Kushina.

 So she and Obito had to have planned this.

 “What do you want to do?” he asked.

 “I think we need to have a chat,” she said. “Then we’ll do something else if it needs doing. Come on, you know I know what it’s like.”

 Kakashi bit back the urge to ask her who _she’d_ torn apart in a tailed-beast-fueled frenzy, if she was so sure it was so similar. “There are some circumstantial differences.”

 The Kyuubi had been given to Kushina in a planned ritual at the death of the previous host. The Sanbi had been forced into Kakashi in a half-assed attempt at making soon-to-die transport that required two later attempts to stabilize it.

 “Some, yeah. But your final seal is based on mine,” she said, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “Beast gets loud sometimes, doesn’t it?”

 Kakashi shrugged, “Sometimes.”

 “And then you get upset that it’s getting loud and start to doubt yourself,” Kushina said knowingly.

 Kakashi scowled and looked away from her. “So let me guess, I’m supposed to just trust the seal?”

 “Not really, it’s not perfect. Mine’s not perfect either,” Kushina admitted. “A large part of holding it back _does_ rely on you. But when you close yourself off you’re not making things easier on yourself. Lady Mito told me that the thing that most helps hold back the beast is love, Kakashi. I’ve found that’s true. Love and other positive emotions fuel your strength to control it. Why do you think Obito is so good at helping you get back in control?”

 Kakashi blinked, “Really?”

 “Yep,” Kushina said. “Isolation, despair, depression,” she nudged him, “all feed the beast. And because we hosts don’t want to hurt anyone—usually—we try to pull away from others to keep them safe. But pulling away just makes it easier for the beast to influence you and drag you under until it controls you. We need our bonds, our love, to keep it at bay.”

 “I don’t _want_ to feel this way, you know,” Kakashi said, pulling away and wrapping his arms around himself. “I _want_ it to get better. But it doesn’t.”

 “Kakashi, you haven’t willingly seen anyone but Obito in weeks,” Kushina said. “I know it’s hard and I know it hurts but you need to try and interact with people again, if only to get back in the habit of it. Closing yourself off and feeling like a monster only feeds the Sanbi.”

 “It’s just…hard,” Kakashi said. “It feels like everyone’s judging me.”

 “Come here,” Kushina said, holding out an arm for a hug. Kakashi eyed it for a moment before giving in and stepping close. “I know, Kakashi. I know. But you’ve got people who care about you and we want to help you. We really do.”

 “I..I guess it’s kind of selfish…putting it all on Obito, huh?” Kakashi asked.

 “You’re not doing it on purpose kiddo,” Kushina said. “And he doesn’t mind if that’s how you need to do it. But if you ask me, you’ve had your little time in your safe place and need to remember what it’s like outside it again, before you start getting too scared to ever leave it.”

 Kakashi’s hand curled into her skirt, twisting the green fabric under his fingers, “Nowhere around _me_ is a safe place.”

 “Really? Looks to me like it was the safest place for Obito to be on that mission,” Kushina said. “And Rina and Hayate came out just fine as well.”

 Kakashi blinked. She…was right. He’d let Hayate get past him easily to go and help Obito and he hadn’t even tried to hurt Hayate or Rin…he’d gone into a bit of a frenzy but it had stayed entirely focused on the enemy.

 “Huh…” he said quietly.

 “See?” Kushina asked. “Now, how about you tell me what happened from your point of view?”

 Kakashi frowned, “I’d gotten hit. It wasn’t that bad, but then Obito and I were dropped in a huge pit by an earth technique. I…I think I have an issue with those, still. So I was already in some pain and then that happened and I guess I just started drawing on the Sanbi’s power.”

 “To what level?” Kushina asked.

 “Well, it hadn’t quite formed the Acid Armor yet,” Kakashi said. “Obito told me to take a moment and I agreed. He went to get out of the pit and got electrocuted by that lightning technique. It just dropped him entirely. And then everything started running together with what happened at the bridge and I…I just lost control…”

 “You didn’t entirely lose control,” Kushina said. “Again, you remembered who the opponents were and only took them out. You also calmed down when Rin yelled for you.”

 “But I still wasn’t thinking,” Kakashi said. “At all.”

 “So we come up for a way for you to use that power when you are thinking,” Kushina said.

  Kakashi reared back, “I don’t want to use it at all!”

 “Kakashi, it’s part of you now,” Kushina said. “You have the choice to control it or to not. I think we all know which one you’d prefer.”

 Kakashi frowned. “You…you think I could control it?”

 “I do indeed,” Kushina said. “But it’s going to be a lot of hard work on your part, buster! Think you can handle it?”

 Kakashi thought about it. At the very least that sounded more like what he was used to, being challenged to do more in training. “Let’s find out.”

.o.o.o.

 Obito didn’t train with Kakashi at all that week. Kushina ended up monopolizing Kakashi’s daylight hours and Obito didn’t mind because somehow, some way, this seemed like it was helping. Kakashi came home bone tired and would sleep deeply, so Obito had to call it success.

 Obito still kept his eye out, though. Kakashi seemed to be mostly eating with Kushina, but Obito still made sure he had breakfast in the morning and made sure he didn’t fall asleep in the shower in the evening.

 Once a week passed, he decided Kakashi’s mood had improved enough to ask, “So how’s it been going? With Kushina?”

 “It’s…frustrating,” Kakashi said, not looking up from brushing Bull’s fur. “My seal’s a lot more complicated than hers due to being reworked twice so they don’t function entirely the same. Pulling on the demon’s chakra without getting overemotional is…difficult.”

 “But Kushina can do it?” Obito asked, rearranging himself on the couch so that he could rest his head on one of the arms while still looking down on Kakashi without neck strain.

 “Yeah, when she focuses,” Kakashi said. He paused, the hand with the brush resting on his thigh. “She doesn’t need to do it much. Apparently the Uzumaki already have insanely deep chakra stores. It’s how she was able to hold the Kyuubi without getting her chakra network blown up because it’s got a lot more raw chakra than the Sanbi.”

 Obito made a face, “That sounds terrifying.”

 “Yeah, she did _not_ make it sound pleasant,” Kakashi said. “Did you know the first person in the village to have the Kyuubi was the First’s wife?”

 “No way!” Obito said. “That’s so cool!” He paused, scars stretching slightly as he pursed his lips in deep thought, “Wait, but the Sanbi doesn’t just give you chakra. You get that freaking cool Acid Armor too!”

 Kakashi nodded, “Yeah. Kushina said the only other things they know the Kyuubi gives are really accelerated healing and some extra ease shaking off genjutsu. I guess it varies from beast to beast.”

 “Huh. That’s…kind of wild, really,” Obito said. “Wonder what other powers there are…”

 “Hopefully none that give us trouble,” Kakashi muttered. For a moment Obito was worried, mistaking trepidation for the return of Kakashi’s unending stress and sadness. But after a few moments Kakashi’s shoulders relaxed and he returned to brushing Bull.

 “Hopefully,” Obito echoed. He slipped off the couch, landing on his knees behind Kakashi. He wrapped his arms around Kakashi resting his head on Kakashi’s shoulder. “You know you’ve got me, right?”

 “Please. Like anything would make you leave,” Kakashi said.

 Obito rolled his eyes, “Stop trying to be all cool and stuff. I mean it. You’re totally killing the mood.”

 “I’m a shinobi. We’re excellent killers,” Kakashi said dryly. Bull scoffed at the bad joke.

 “Oh for crying out loud; you’re not funny, you scrawny weirdo,” Obito groaned.

  “Scrawny?” Kakashi demanded, whipping around in his boyfriend’s grip and grabbing the front of Obito’s shirt.

 Obito seized Kakashi’s wrist in return, “Yeah, scrawny. Seriously, look at this, how does your muscle always stay so freaking compact? You’re pretty darn strong but you always look underfed…”

 “I’ve heard turtle meat is kind of lean,” Bull offered.

 Both humans stared at him blankly for a moment before Obito started laughing. “Oh, oh I get it, it’s the dumb turtle’s fault Kakashi’s a skinny little scarecrow—urk!”

 “You want to say that again, ‘bito?” Kakashi asked. His eye curved shut as his lips turned up in a dangerous grin. He’d managed to pin Obito flat.

 Obito smiled, “You’re a skinny little scarecrow.” He used Kamui to let Kakashi fall through him and rolled aside. “But you’re _my_ scarecrow so it’s all cool.”

 Kakashi sighed fondly, “And I suppose you’re my idiot, idiot.”

 “I’ll take it!” Obito said, basking in seeing Kakashi finally happy again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, finally got the Slip arc finished. Next time: someone finally says that which has not been said yet.


	22. Love

 They stumbled into their apartment, exhausted from the mission. Headbands were discarded, Kakashi’s sword landed on the table, Obito’s coat on a chair, their sandals tossed to the couch. Obito stayed on Kakashi’s heels to the point of falling onto Kakashi’s bed right behind the jonin.

 “What are you _doing?”_ Kakashi groaned.

 “Sleep. Tired,” Obito said. He grabbed at Kakashi to pull him closer. “Night.”

 Kakashi growled and elbowed him sharply in order to get enough space to settle how he’d like. “You’re impossible.”

 “Mm-hm, love you too.”

 Kakashi stiffened in his arms, “What?”

 “…Love you,” Obito repeated.

 “Oh.”

 “Oh?” Obito groaned. “What _oh_?”

 “…You’ve never said it, okay?” Kakashi muttered.

 “What, really?” Obito asked.

 “ _Yes_ ,” Kakashi said, turning to face him.

 “Oh,” Obito echoed. “Um…well…I do. A lot.”

 Kakashi stared at him silently before tugging his mask down and kissing him.

 Obito grinned into it, hauling Kakashi over by the hips, “You were going to sleep with your mask on?”

 “Says the ninja—still in bandages,” Kakashi murmured when he took breaks to come up for air.

 “Screw you, I look cool.”

 “Don’t tell me you’re actually thinking of screwing me right now,” Kakashi teased, grinding their hips together. “You never seemed concerned before…”

 Obito started turning red, “Sh- _shut_ _up_! We don’t _all_ consider porn daily reading, you know!”

 “But it’s given me some ideas…” Kakashi laughed, enjoying Obito’s new shades of crimson.

 “I’ll give _you_ ideas, you-”

 Kakashi froze as Obito seized his shirt. Wait-shit-no-the seal-!

 “…Kashi? You okay?” Obito asked.

 “Y-yeah,” Kakashi said. “Fine.”

 “…This about what’s under the shirt?”

 “…Yes.”

 “Can I show you something?”

 Kakashi nodded.

 Obito pulled back, sat up, and quietly started unwrapping the bandages he always kept around his right arm. Kakashi watched quietly as a whole, clear arm was revealed.

 “Why do you keep it wrapped?” he asked suddenly. It looked fine.

 “Because it’s not mine, or at least not entirely,” Obito said. “If I leave my hand free the bandages are so white I can trick myself into thinking it’s my skin but with it off…”

 It was harder to see in the dark, but with Obito’s own hand resting on the transplanted arm Kakashi could see that the other one was eerily pale, not just Obito’s own natural Uchiha-pale. It wasn’t as white as the discarded bandages, but that was the point, as Obito said, the bandages made the hand look darker by comparison.

 “And it scares me. Since we still don’t know who did it,” Obito said, bringing that hand up and flexing it in front of his face. “Thinking it was Orochimaru is scary enough, but if it _wasn’t_ him…who was it? And can they take control of it or something?”

 “I don’t think so. It’s so integrated into your system and Rin’s never found any control devices during her exams,” Kakashi said. “And you know how much fun she has hypothesizing about what happened to you and how that arm came to be.”

 Obito laughed, probably because it was true. Then he sobered and reached for his shirt.

 Kakashi’s eyes widened. If the contrast between the arms was there, it was nothing compared to the line down Obito’s torso, travelling all the way to his belt line and probably further.  There was a faint ridge there, and Kakashi had to suppress the urge to touch it.

 “Feels kind of funny, when I’m actually thinking about how it feels,” Obito said, running his own hand down that side. “Sense of touch is kind of low, pain’s almost nothing, and it doesn’t always bleed red, sometimes it bleeds white stuff.”

 “Huh,” Kakashi said.

 “Rin says it’s like a combination of human cells and plant matter.”

 “Wait, so you’re part plant or something?” Kakashi asked blankly.

 “I have no clue.”

 Kakashi looked at Obito silently. The white-matter was one thing, but there were also the other scars, the ones that twisted the right side of his face that Kakashi had claimed as his property all those months ago.  

 Unlike the prosthetics or Kakashi’s own seal, Obito couldn’t hide those easily.

 Feeling a little ashamed of his former reaction, Kakashi tugged Obito’s hands over to his own shirt’s hem. “Okay. But careful. It’s…a bit sensitive.”

 “Okay, Kakashi,” Obito said as if he was calming one of the puppies when they were spooked. “Okay.”

 Kakashi knew was the scars looked like, they formed a massive circular seal that took up almost his entire chest. The Mist ninja had done it that way, carved it in, to inflict more pain and tire him out from blood loss so he couldn’t kill himself or properly communicate to Rin to do so. Obito had done so as well to fix the seal on the fly and help hold the Sanbi. Only Jiraiya’s contribution had involved ink instead of tracks through his flesh, so only it was hidden.

 “God, Kashi,” Obito breathed.

 Kakashi shuddered as Obito laid his palms flat on his chest, slowly moving up over the seal to rest on his shoulders.

 “I…I’m just glad. You’re still here,” Obito said, pulling Kakashi closer and leaning their foreheads together. “And…and you’re still you. Not a monster, not just a container, you’re still an annoyingly impressive jonin with a stick up his butt _way_ too much-”

 The idiot was laughing.

 “What’s so funny?” Kakashi asked.

 “I love you,” Obito said. “I mean…can you imagine, with where we started out?”

 “You mean me showing you up at the academy or when the team started?” Kakashi asked smugly.

 “Both, jackass,” Obito laughed. He kissed him. “But you’re my jackass.”

 “And you’re my fool,” Kakashi said, kissing back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh, contrary to one guess, the thing which hadn't been said yet was "I love you."
> 
> And now it has been. 
> 
> For anyone wondering about the timeline: it's still within a year or so of Kakashi getting the Sanbi. He's fourteen and Obito is fifteen by now. So we're within a year of Naruto being born which we're going to speed up a bit to, there's only one chapter planned between those events and now.


	23. Itachi

 It was all just incredibly lucky coincidence. Obito teleported over to the compound to ask Mikoto if she’d like a break from her kid that day, give her pregnant self some rest. Recent skirmishes with Iwa had sent a lot of shinobi to the border and so she didn’t have Fugaku around to let Itachi hang out at the station or even just distract him for a while. So Obito would offer to be that distraction.

 He found his cousin frantic that she couldn’t find her son.

 “Well where’d you see him last?” Obito asked, summoning Pakkun to track the boys scent.

 “I don’t know,” Mikoto said. “…Outside. He was outside the front of the house a few hours ago. I must have dozed off…”

 “Come on Itachi’s a good kid. Probably doesn’t even know you’re looking for him and if he did he’d come running,” Obito said.

 “Hey, Bed,” Pakkun called. “There’s a scroll here. I think he read it and then went that way…”

 “This is a conscription scroll,” Mikoto said.

 “Wait, things are tense enough to conscript?” Obito asked. “The heck are Kakashi and I still here for?”

 “It’s just for a single mission and for one Uchiha…” Mikoto said. “Ah, Pakkun? How many more people do you smell around this area?”

 “Not counting you two and Itachi? Three. So most of a squad,” Pakkun said.

 “Things aren’t tense enough to just order a kid into things…” Obito said.

 “Who’s to say they told him they wanted him as first choice?” Mikoto asked darkly, Sharingan sparking in her eyes.

 It sunk in. Obito’s heart dropped.

 Mikoto was due in only a week or two. She’d still have gone if they’d asked, but they hadn’t, assuming she as too incapacitated or she couldn’t run fast enough. Or telling someone like Itachi they’d ask her at all was a bluff to make sure to get him.

 Why the hell would they want him?

 “I’ll catch up,” Obito said, re-reading the scroll and where they were headed. “I’ll handle whatever they thought they needed him for, for him. I’ll just chuck him into Kamui, it’s safe in there, Kakashi and I haven’t let anything lying around. Pakkun, go get Kakashi, bring him here. Shit, shit….I’ll catch up!”

 Mikoto gave him a firm nod and Obito used Kamui to get himself closer to the wall. Then past it. Then past that. Further.

 He’d never gone this far with the technique before. He had to pause now and then to re-orient himself, mentally check the landmarks. It was actually a pretty fast way to travel far now that he was trying it…

 They couldn’t have gotten far. It had only been a few hours. Even running at top speed, likely carrying Itachi if going that fast since he was _five damn years old whose idea was this, Obito would **burn**_ _them_.

 He knew some ninja did stupid things during wartime. Hell some did stupid things during peace time, like trying to train clan heirs too hard early or saying “hey this six year old is ready to be a chunin.” It happened.

 But there was no reason for this. Itachi did not have the Sharingan, and even if he did _Obito had been in the village and able to do missions_. Skipping over him for a pregnant lady and five year old made no damn sense if they needed an Uchiha so that excuse was probably worthless and they were just trying something stupid and some idiot gave them an official scroll because they weren’t paying attention…

 Someone in the admin building was getting their desk egged.

 He smelled the blood before he saw them and triangulated the position based on that. He appeared in a clearing and Kamui let a panicked Great Fireball from one of the chunin slide through him. 

 He ignored the adults for the moment. Itachi was what mattered. Itachi, small and shaking with a kunai in his hand and a bruise on his face and eyes red not just from crying but just red-

 Red. Sharingan. Whatever had happened, Itachi had been put through enough to awaken it.

  _He was barely five._

 Too late. He was too late. It was over.

 “What the hell?” he demanded of Chihiro. If this had been some fucking plan to get the clan head’s kid’s bloodline awake early he was going to stuff her Sharingan down her throat…

 “It was an emergency,” the jonin insisted.

 “Oh, fuck you,” Obito snapped. Like hell it was.

 “Stand down, chunin,” Chihrio said, folding her arms. Her Sharingan met his. Obito sneered at how she faltered ever so slightly when he let his form the Mangekyo. “I _said_ stand-”

 “And I said _fuck you_ ,” Obito said. He took a step forward. Chihiro and the two chunin stepped back. Itachi didn’t move. “What, were you hoping to get Fugaku to not kill you by hoping he’d be proud about his eyes or something? What the fuck? Grab _another_ fucking Uchiha, idiots!”

 “The recent escalation put everyone on the front lines, there were no other Uchiha!” Ranmaru insisted. At least he wasn’t stupid enough to try and intimidate Obito with the Sharingan after seeing Chihiro fail. “Mikoto-sama’s stamina-”

 “ _I’m a fucking Uchiha_!” Obito snapped. “ _I_ was in the fucking village, you idiots! I’d have done it!”

 “You are _not_ an Uchiha,” Chihiro said.

 “And you apparently put clan politics over _keeping a five year old out of this_ ,” Obito said. “Itachi, cool your heels in Kamui. You’ve been relieved.”

 “That’s…the other dimension, right?” Itachi asked quietly.

 “Yes,” Obito said. “It’s safe in there. Your mother’s going to get Kakashi. He’ll pull you out the other end.”

 “Okay,” Itachi said, voice still faint. Obito hoped he wasn’t going into shock, and that if he was Kakashi would have him soon enough.

 “Kamui,” Obito said aloud for the benefit of the people watching. Itachi was tugged off this plane and left a blank space, as if he was never there. “So, got anything else to do or was this just a ‘drag a child into war’ _day trip_?”

 Chihiro glared at him. Good. They may have additional mission objectives, but Obito’s new mission was to complete those objectives while driving his current team mad.

.o.o.o.

 Itachi tucked his knees to his chest, willing the Sharingan to turn off. It took a few tries.

 He was pretty sure he knew why Obito was angry. This had just been some kind of…trick. A way to get his Sharingan up early, for whatever reason. For the clan’s reputation, probably. He’d thought it’d be okay since, well Kakashi had been a ninja when he was five. If he could handle it then Itachi could too right?

 He wasn’t hurt. They hadn’t let him get hurt. But he was scared.

 He’d managed to fight when the skirmish started but he’d been overwhelmed and nearly killed.

 That had gotten his eyes working. That had been what they wanted, for his stupid Sharingan to activate.

 He remembered the smell of the dead bodies and threw up as he started to cry again.

 He could cry in here. There was no one else to see it. He didn’t have to be the composed clan heir.

 Everything swirled and for a moment he panicked before remembering that only Obito and Kakashi could come and go from this place. He landed in his den, in his home.

 “Oh, Itachi,” his mother said, pulling him close.

 “Are you injured? I can send a…no of course you aren’t, Obito wouldn’t have just dropped you in there if you were,” Kakashi said, running a hand through his hair. “Uh…”

 Itachi didn’t hear him if he kept going. All he could hear, all he wanted to hear, was his mother’s breathing.

 “You’re home, sweetie. Oh Itachi. Why did you go?”

 “Chihiro said if I didn’t you would have to,” Itachi said. He knew it was a lie now.

 “Chihiro is in trouble then,” Mikoto said firmly. “If she’d come to me and she said it needed another Uchiha I’d have made her take Obito. Oh, my little boy.”

 “I…I have the Sharingan,” Itachi offered. Maybe her being proud about that would make it better? Maybe it would be worth it?

 She tugging him closer, “Oh, sweetheart…”

 Something hit him. Itachi fell back in shock.

 “Oh!” his mother said, touching her stomach. “Looks like little Sasuke wants to make sure you’re all right, Itachi!”

 “Sasuke?” Itachi asked.

 “We found out in the last round of tests,” Mikoto said. “You’re going to have a little brother, Itachi. We named him Sasuke.”

 He looked at her stomach, “Sasuke…”

 “Oof,” his mother said, putting a hand on her back, “I guess he’s really worried about you. He’s getting a bit rowdy…”

 “Here,” Kakashi said, helping her up off the floor and into an armchair.

 “Thank you,” Mikoto said. Kakashi nodded before sinking down to the floor to sit beside Itachi in her place.

  Kakashi slowly reached over and ruffled his hair a bit, “I’m kind of bad at this but…would dogs help?”

 The idea of hugging and petting something fuzzy had some serious appeal right now.

 “Please,” Itachi said.

 Kakashi nodded and performed a summoning. Out popped three dogs—Itachi recognized Pakkun, who often hung around in Obito’s hair, but the big brown one and the small scruffy one with angry eyes were new to him.

 “These two are Bull and Urushi,” Pakkun said. He looked at Itachi speculatively before hopping into his lap, “You look very comfortable.”

 “Thank you,” Itachi said as Bull flopped onto his back with a thump to give Itachi access to his stomach. As he hunched over to rub it, Pakkun migrated to his head and Urushi curled into his side. After a moment’s hesitation Itachi leaned fulling to Bull’s warm, thick fur.

.o.o.o.

 “So, what are you planning to do?” Minato asked Fugaku. “I’m going to court martial her, of course, who brings a non-shinobi five year old into combat, but I don’t want to overlap with your clan’s punishments.”

 “Chihiro has lost status with the clan,” Fugaku said. “She is forbidden from ever taking custody of an Uchiha child, forbidden from supervising the training of children, and considered close to being banned. I assume you have lowered her rank?”

 “She’s down to chunin,” Minato agreed. “And will be spending most of her free time cleaning the Academy for the foreseeable future. She will not be leading squads any time soon and will have fines taken from her pay to compensate Itachi for emotional distress.” He looked at Itachi, “Is that all right?”

 Itachi nodded, “That’s all right.”

 Obito huffed. He’d managed to goad Chihiro into a fight before they mission had ended, so he was mostly satisfied. Only mostly, since upon getting home Mikoto and Bull had relayed that Itachi had nightmares every night now.

 “As your Hokage I offer my apologies,” Minato said. “Chirhiro was of your clan but she was also one of my shinobi.”

 “She did it in her eyes, for the clan,” Fugaku said. “You needn’t shoulder extra blame.”

 Minato added, “Very well. Itachi? How are you holding up?”

 “I’ll be fine,” Itachi said. “I…I just want to meet Sasuke. I’m focusing on that. That I’m going to meet him soon.”

 Mikoto looked touched. Fugaku nodded before adding, “Will Chihiro still be at the academy if Itachi starts attending? Or would she be assigned elsewhere?”

 Obito didn’t miss how Itachi stiffened. He was only a little more surprised at how _Kakashi_ snapped to alertness as soon as Fugaku mentioned Itachi’s enrollment.

 “You want to start him now?” Minato asked.   

 “If he has the Sharingan we should probably start him at the academy as soon as the next term starts,” Fugaku said.

 Itachi looked nervous. Obito tried to cut in, “Are we sure that’s the best idea?”

 “If you have an objection, say it” Fugaku said.

 “Fine. I think my little cousin is traumatized and needs time to recover,” Obito said. “Throwing him in the academy with a bunch of kids eager to be ninja right after he’d been through the hell of a small war skirmish might make things worse.”

 “He does have a point,” Mikoto said. “Fugaku, Itachi can barely sleep right now, school might put too much strain on him.”

 “I think five’s a little young anyway, generally speaking,” Kakashi said. “Six is better.”

 “You were five when you started,” Fugaku said. “Five when you graduated too.”

 “That’s why I said it’s a bad idea,” Kakashi said. “Itachi’s smart, he’ll graduate early anyway. Let him wait until six to start.”

 Obito half expected Fugaku to lose his temper, since Kakashi was pretty much butting into clan business. On the other hand, Kakashi was definitely the voice of experience in this sort of situation and Obito technically wasn’t clan anymore either so he was butting in too.

 “I can train him with the Sharingan at home,” Mikoto said. “He can learn to deal with this while he learns his eyes and gets to know his brother.”

 “Please, father?” Itachi asked, finally speaking up. “I don’t want to fight right now. I just want to be a big brother. Please?”

 “…One year,” Fugaku agreed with a sigh. “I’ll expect you to also study clan history and affairs during that time, since you won’t have schoolwork.”

 “Of course,” Itachi said. “I don’t want to be bored or anything. I just…don’t want to fight right now…”

 “All right. You won’t have to,” Fugaku said, putting a hand on his son’s head.

 “Thanks,” Itachi told Kakashi.

 “I’ll expect an exemplary big brother performance as payment,” Kakashi said.

 Itachi nodded firmly. Obito smiled. Sasuke wasn’t even here yet and it was clear Itachi loved him more than anything. It was adorable.

They went their separate ways after leaving Minato’s office. Mikoto took Itachi over to see Kushina so they could look into sleeping remedies, Fugaku went to head back to the border, and Kakashi and Obito headed home to rest up for whatever missions came tomorrow.

 “Five is a bad academy age, huh?” Obito asked as they locked the door behind them. “Regrets?”

 “Obito, if that cousin of yours tries to make chunin before he’s ten I’ll sabotage him myself,” Kakashi said. “It’s…I’m trying to help Sensei work on not putting prodigies in the field before they’re ready, no matter how strong they are at a young age. I’m not the only one it screwed up.”

 “Hey, he may be a genius but he doesn’t seem too into the idea of ranking up too fast,” Obito said. “…So how many years til he graduates the academy?”

 “Only one or two. Kid’s scarily smart,” Kakashi said.

“Hopefully Sensei won’t make you his sensei.”

 “I think I’ve got a lot more control work to do before throwing me around children who will be trying to break my sanity is a good idea,” Kakashi said.

 “Yeah, besides, you as a sensei? Think of the poor students!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly part of Itachi's backstory that I think it some of the most intriguing is how he was traumatized by the third world war as a young child. It took a little longer here (in canon he was four by the time he'd seen enough to attempt suicide, and it was Fugaku who took him to see the corpses which...wtf, man, but he wouldn't survive doing that in this AU so yeah, cause Mikoto and Obito would kill him and Minato would likely court marshal him for taking a child civilian to a battlefield for a "life lesson") but it still eventually happened.
> 
> So in this fic it was just someone dragging him into a small skirmish in an attempt to awaken his Sharingan (feather in in the clan's cap to have such a prodigy as an heir and all that), assuming that it fit with Fugaku's other (offscreen) attempts at toughing Itachi up. It's also a sign that some of the clan are already starting to do REALLY stupid shit, which will be continuing. Obito being home isn't enough to deal with generations of resentment, after all, especially since he's currently still kicked out.
> 
> I can see Kakashi as having it be a pet project to keep kids too young from being genin and chunin. He knows it screwed him up but good, and Minato agrees. 
> 
> For anyone keeping track of time we're in early July now. Itachi's birthday was about a month ago, Sasuke will be born in two weeks, and Naruto will be born in three months. Kushina is currently hiding her pregnancy.


	24. Sasuke

 Obito and Kakashi’s first look at Sasuke had been photos Mikoto had passed Kushina and Minato. They’d been out of the village on a mission with Rin and Gai when Sasuke was born. Rin had been promoted to jonin as a result of her rather impressive job of healing her entire squad and another squad in combat while not-dying to someone trying very hard to kill the medic. Obito felt she deserved it—it had been damn impressive.

 Her reward was getting to be the first of Team Minato to hold a week and a half old Sasuke Uchiha when Mikoto, Itachi, and Sasuke met them for breakfast.

 Obito only wasn’t jealous of Rin because he was too busy being charmed by how carefully Itachi handed his baby brother over and how bluntly he instructed Rin on holding Sasuke.

 “He’s very…firm about this,” Obito told Mikoto.

 “Oh he’s attached to Sasuke like nothing else,” Mikoto said. “It’s good. You’re usually worried a child might get jealous of the attention given to a new baby. I think Itachi’s more jealous of _me_ for getting to spend more time around Sasuke than him!”

 “That is precious,” Obito said.

 “He read some of the baby books _for_ her!” Kushina added, beaming.

 “That is so cute!” Obito said, trying to muffle his laughter in his hands.

 “Of course his sleep schedule’s even more shot to hell than with just the nightmares since he wants to wake up if Sasuke’s crying,” Mikoto said. “Kushina and I can only push so many sleep aids onto him, since he’s five. Letting Bull stay with us while you were on the mission helped. Fugaku says he's really good at helping Itachi fall back asleep.”

 “Are you trying to make the head family of the Uchiha Clan into dog people?” Minato asked, smirking.

 “Well, I’m already converted and I think we’ve got Itachi…” Obito said, grinning.

 “Bull’s cool,” Itachi admitted, finally seeming to feel that Rin could hold Sasuke without being watched like a hawk. “Hey, Kakashi, where’d your food go?”

 “I ate it,” Kakashi said. “It was very good, the eggs especially.”

 Itachi’s jaw dropped, “So fast?!?”

 “Aw, hoping to see the masked wonder’s face?” Minato asked. “Sorry kiddo. Kakashi has long since mastered the art on inhaling his food so people don’t see him mask-less.”

 “It’s a talent,” Kakashi admitted, eye curving in a dead giveaway that he was beaming.

 Itachi looked suitably impressed. Obito just punched his boyfriend in the arm.

 “No roughhousing around the baby,” Rin said. “Come on, Obito, your turn.”

 Itachi zipped over to Obito’s side to observe the Sasuke-transfer. Obito didn’t comment since he was pretty sure a lot of the clinginess came from the recent trauma Itachi’d been through and that he’d settle down sooner or later.

 Sasuke was so small and light. He’d been asleep the whole time and stayed that way. Obito smiled at him, “Heavy sleeper?”

 “He just ate before we came,” Mikoto said. “He’ll be out for a few more hours before he’s hungry or messy.”

  “Cool,” Obito said.

 “I can’t wait until he’s old enough for me to teach him things!” Itachi said.

 “That’s going to take a few years, Itachi,” Mikoto said. “Hopefully the novelty won’t wear off by then.”

 “It’s not novelty,” Itachi protested. “He’s my baby brother and I love him!”

  Itachi squirmed as all the older ninja grinned at him for being so adorable, “What?”

 “You’re adorable, dear,” Mikoto said.

 “You’re all weird,” Itachi sighed. “…Can I have Sasuke back now?”

 “Kakashi hasn’t had a turn yet,” Kushina said, grinning.

 “…What?” Kakashi asked.

 Obito grinned and handed him Sasuke, “This is a baby and you are going to hold it.”

  Kakashi went rigid as Sasuke fell into his arms. “Now what?”

 “…Eh. Keep doing that,” Kushina advised. “You’re fine.”

 Kakashi peered at Sasuke, “We’re sure?”

 “I think we finally found something Kakashi’s scared of: babies,” Rin said.

 “Here, let’s give him back to Itachi,” Obito snickered, helping Kakashi pass Sasuke over. Itachi took him with a wide grin and sat down on the floor to cuddle his sleeping brother. “See? You held a baby and nobody got hurt. Everything was fine.”

 “Maybe it’s a good thing you weren’t a genin long enough to get babysitting missions,” Minato chuckled before sharing a look with Kushina.

 “Probably,” Kakashi agreed. Obito guessed he missed the look. He wondered if Minato and Kushina were planning on having a kid any time soon…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short little blurb about an infant Sasuke before Team Minato learns there's a mini Namikaze on the way and has been for some time (Kushina's about six months along by now, but she's been hiding it really well). Itachi loves his baby bro so much! But yeah, a lot of the clinginess is him being recently traumatized and he'll settle down to normal loving brother status with a year or so. 
> 
> Also yes, Kakashi is nervous around babies. Some people just are and he's one of them.
> 
> As for Fugaku, he was the one up half the night with the kids so he's getting some much needed shut-eye before going in to the station.


	25. Preparations

 “You’re having a baby?” Obito asked Kushina as he jumped up from the couch in her den.

 “No I’m smuggling a ton of ramen packets under my dress! Of course I’m having a baby!” Kushina laughed. “We’ve just been keeping it a secret!”

 “Huh,” Kakashi said.

 “That really all you’ve got?” Rin asked. She looked almost as surprised as Obito.

 “I’m sure you’ll be a good mom,” Kakashi added to Kushina. He settled back, thinking. “I guess sensei already knows some parenting already, too…”

 “Yes, from watching over our favorite little masked brat,” Kushina said brightly, ruffling his hair. Kakashi scowled and swatted her hand away. “Hey! No smacking the pregnant lady!”

 “That was _barely_ a tap,” Kakashi said. “Ow! Obito!”

 Obito folded his arms now that he’d finished smacking Kakashi upside the head. “No hitting the pregnant lady.”

 “See? This one gets it,” Kushina said smugly. “Good job, Obito.”

 He grinned at Kakashi. Kakashi rolled his eyes and sprawled a bit so there was no room for Oito to sit down on the couch. Obito tried to outright sit on him instead. Kakashi kicked him in the backside, or tried to as Obito used Kamui to have it slide through him.

 Rin solved things by cheerfully shoving Kakashi off the couch too.

 Minato groaned and put his face in his hands, “Kushina, my love, my light, remind me why I thought my _darling_ students were mature enough for this?”

 “I don’t know dear,” she said, grinning at the boys on the floor. “Come on, both of you. Be serious.”

 Kakashi instantly regained his composure. Obito rolled his eye. Typical.

 “Now, the fact that I’m having a baby is very classified. So if you want to be Itachi and tell everyone you’re going to be big brothers and a big sister soon—don’t,” Kushina said.

 “Course it’s classified. You’re the Hokage’s wife,” Kakashi said.

 “There’s more than that,” Minato said. “There’s one big potential problem.”

 He and Kushina shared a look. Kushina took a deep breath before looking at Rin, Obito, and finally Kakashi to make sure she had their full attention.

 “A jinchuuriki’s seal is at greatest chance of breaking in two cases,” Kushina said. “Right before death…or when giving birth.”

 “But the First’s wife had kids!” Obito said. “So we can totally handle it, right? The First and his wife could!”

 “Right,” Kushina said. “Lady Mito had children and they managed to keep the Kyuubi contained at the time. So we’re going to do the same. But it requires careful planning.”

 “That’s why Kushina’s kept the pregnancy quiet until it was impossible to hide anymore. _Officially_ she’s four months along with twins,” Minato said. “Not nearly nine with one kid.”

 “Thank goodness. You two having twins? They’d level the village,” Kakashi said. Kushina viciously ruffled Kakashi’s hair in response and he groaned.

 “So what’s the plan?” Obito asked.

 “I’m helping Lady Biwako with delivery,” Rin said. “In a secluded location while Minato-sensei sees to the seal with some help of his own.”

 “Sounds good,” Obito said. “So where do we come in?”

 “Kamui is the best way to get to us quickly,” Minato said. “If something goes wrong, you two can show up fastest and help us subdue anyone trying to interfere.”

 “What do you think could go wrong?” Kakashi asked, resting his head on his fist to think. “If it’s occurred before then presumably you can contain the Kyuubi unless…”

 “Outside interference,” Minato said. “It’s a long and annoying habit of enemy villages to try to pull shit like this. Along with the traditional ‘let’s assassinate the village leader’s spouse’ problem.”

 “Which ranks slightly above the ‘let’s assassinate the clan head’s spouse’ problem we had a little while back when Sasuke was born,” Kushina said. “Everyone in a hidden village worth its salt knows by now that yes, an important ninja and their spouse will have their guards down during childbirth and thus many other people with sharp objects need to have their guards up to keep them safe.”

 “I’ll keep extra sharp objects at hand then,” Kakashi said wryly.

 “There is one big caveat,” Kushina said. “If the Kyuubi does get out…”

 “You’ll die,” Obito said, looking worried.

“Well…yes. Almost entirely likely,” Kushina said. “But I was going to say that if the Kyuubi gets out, Kakashi may have trouble with the Sanbi as well.”

 Kakashi stiffened, “Yeah?”

 “Yes,” Minato said. “On the other hand, you’re some of the only ninja strong and trusted enough to know about this. If you think you can handle it should the worst happen, I’ll leave getting involved up to your discretion.”

 Obito and Kakashi shared looks before replying in unison, “Got it, sensei.”

 “Okay,” Minato said. “So here are the basic plans: Kushina’s delivery date is the tenth. She will be escorted to the delivery location by Biwako, pretending they are going for a walk while discussing the challenges of twins since, well, Biwako’s had twins. There will be ANBU waiting for them. I will use Flying Thundergod to transport Rin and myself there directly from my office. Then we will begin.”

 “Where’s the location?” Obito asked.

 “A large, easily defended cave just outside the village,” Minato said. “The window in your apartment that looks at the wall? That way.”

 “Got it,” Kakashi said.

 “Sarutobi, Koharu, Homura, and Jiraiya are going to be on guard,” Minato said. “You’ll need to check in with one of the if you’re getting involved.”

 “What about Danzo?” Kakashi asked.

 Minato sighed. His students knew he didn’t much like the war hawk but also that this was a tense situation and a ninja like Danzo would be useful. Probably.

 “His job is to keep the hospital safe and a path free from the danger zone to the hospital,” Minato said. “How he does that is left to his own discretion.”

 “We're not sure how he could turn that bad,” Kushina said. “Outside of using it to boost his reputation. And that would mean he did it well which would itself be a good thing, so…”

 “Exactly,” Minato said. “If he does good, then hooray. Good was done. This is a tense thing, so we can’t be too picky.”

 “Yeah. And if he tries anything later he’ll answer to me!” Kushina declared, smacking her hand and fist together.

 The idea of Danzo vs. the Red Hot-Blooded Habanero sent Minato’s students into snicker-fits. They were all sure of Kushina coming out on top of that, especially if the war turned into a public relations one.

 “Good job lightening the mood,” Minato told Kushina.

 “I’m the best,” she said, shrugging.

 “You sure are,” he said, kissing her.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this universe, Konhamaru's dad and Asuma are twins. So sayeth me!
> 
> We're coming up on one of the big game-changers for the fic, something every Naruto-canon-divergent-AU has to count down to in some way (bar the very few that skip it somehow). 
> 
> Next time: Kyuubi  
> Also next time: a long author's note because I anticipate many questions.


	26. Kyuubi

 “It’s going to go well,” Obito repeated. “It’s going to go fine and we’re going to meet little Naruto tomorrow.”

 His back was ramrod straight even though he was stretched out on the couch. The couch that had been moved to face the window that looked towards the direction of the cave that the birth was going to be in so he could see the second things went wrong.

 Which they would not. It would be fine.

 “It’s going to go well,” Obito repeated.

  Kakashi sat on the floor, meditating. The dogs had huddled around him for moral support, sensing his stress. Even Pakkun had ignored Obito’s hair in favor of Kakashi’s lap.

 “Think…think he’ll look more like Sensei or Kushina?” Kakashi asked softly.

 “Well Kushina’s hair’s darker…but then red is usually recessive so I’m not sure,” Obito admitted. “Bet he’ll have her smile, though. It’s a good smile.”

 “Yeah,” Kakashi agreed. “Kid…kid’s going to be fine and give us hell, right?”

 “Hell right,” Obito agreed. “I bet before they’re six, they get us-”

 Kakashi suddenly went rigid. Obito’s eye snapped back to the window.

 He watched in horror as red chakra rose and became a fox taller than the wall around the village. The beast seemed to stagger before it stumbled through the wall, bringing huge chunks of stone down onto the village.

 “Shit,” Kakashi breathed.

 Obito held out a hand, “Feel up to it?”

 “Yeah,” Kakashi said. He looked at the dogs, “Stay here unless you think the building will come down on you.”

 “Got it, Boss,” Pakkun said as Bull kicked the window open for them.

 They raced to the tower, forgoing Kamui to save chakra in case they needed it later, since the tower would give them the best vantage point. The Third was already up there, in full armor. They landed behind him.

 “What do we know?” Obito asked.

 “Not much, yet,” Sarutobi said. “Koharu and Homura set out. They’re going to try and force it back outside the walls. Danzo is already at the hospital. Jiraiya will be along shortly.”

 “Any news from the sealing site?” Obito asked.

 “None, yet,” Sarutobi sighed. “We must assume the worst.”

 “All right, let’s go,” Kakashi said. The three of them ran to the edge of the roof only to be startled by a yellow flash and the appearance of Gamabunta. The great toad was maybe only the size of the fox’s torso, but he drew his sword anyway.

 “Sensei!” Obito said, overjoyed to know he was alive.

 “He’s bought us time! Move now!” Sarutobi ordered.

 “Yes sir!” Kakashi and Obito said.

 Gamabunta pressed on against the fox even as ninja on the ground hammered at it with every long range attack they had, all trying to force it back. Sarutobi joined the ground forces as Kakashi and Obito landed behind their sensei on the giant toad.

 “Plan?” Kakashi asked, firing off a rather powerful lightning jutsu at the fox’s eye. Obito followed it with Amaterasu and the Kyuubi screamed at the flames that did not extinguish catching it on the nose. The sound shook the village and caused a tower near the academy to collapse onto the school building.

 “Knock it back. Rin has Kushina and Naruto and one of my kunai so I can summon them with a reversed Flying Thunder God. We can try to re-seal it into Naruto,” Minato said. Kakashi fired off another lighting technique in time with earth techniques on the ground. The fox lost its footing and Gamabunta took the chance to ram it.

 The Kyuubi was sent sprawling into the woods beyond the wall. Kakashi heard Sarutobi on the ground calling for barrier jutsu to close the hole before the fox came back.

 “We have to be careful, we were attacked,” Minato said. “Kushina, Rin, Naruto, and I were the only survivors, Kushina only barely. It was a man in an orange mask, hair the same color.”

 “Understood,” Kakashi and Obito said as Gamabunta leaped and tried to pin the fox down.

  “He’s tough. I’ll need you to keep him off me so I can do the seal,” Minato added as they landed on the ground, leaving Gamabunta to his tussle.

 “All right, Sensei, we can handle—whoa!” Obito said, letting a long sword slide through him before flickering away.

Kakahi growled as they turned to face the masked man who’d summoned the sword. A yellow flash let them know Rin, Kushina, and Naruto were here now too.

 Kakashi drew his own sword, reflecting another weapon as the masked man grew extra arms. “I’ve got him for now. Speed up the seal with Sensei. The Kyuubi is the bigger trouble. I’ll call if I need you.”

 “Got it!” Obito said.

 The masked man had to be tough to take his sensei on in the cave, Obito had to admit. But Kakashi was a focused jonin who could fuel Kamui techniques over and over with the chakra of a Bijuu to stay in the game for a long, long time. It looked like Kakashi could hold off the jackass just fine while Obito helped their sensei and Rin throw together a rushed seal to contain the Kyuubi before more damage was done.

 Kushina seemed to be saving her strength, curling protectively around her wailing child and reflecting the fox’s paws with chakra chains when they came too close.

 But the fox only seemed to get more and more enraged by the fighting near its feet and going by the look in Kakashi’s eyes, the turtle wasn’t very happy either. Sensei’s warning about Bijuu too close to each other was very real, and it was weighing down on them like a ticking bomb. Gamabunta was finally pushed to his limit and forced to retreat, leaving the humans alone with the fox.

 Jiraiya appeared as Kushina managed to get her chakra chains fully around the Kyuubi’s right forleg to keep it from stepping on her and Naruto, the baby cradled in her lap as it took her both hands, and partially immobilize the fox besides. Rin rushed away from the sealwork, replaced by the sannin, to try and heal the gaping wound in Kushina’s chest but Obito could see from where he was that Kushina was fading fast.

 Obito knew the seal they’d been drawing, knew the cost, so he knew why Jiraiya and Minato started arguing as they began to complete it. Someone had to willingly die. He planned to just do it himself once the seal was finished, while they were still debating it since he was less important than the Toad Sage or Hokage, but a scream from Kakashi distracted him.

 He hadn’t been hit yet, but something was wrong. Obito’s eye widened as green-blue chakra started seeping around Kakashi’s body. The masked man took his chance and knocked Kakashi to the ground. Obito quickly used Kamui to get between them and set the man’s arm alight with Amaterasu while throwing shuriken to try and back him up.

 “The Sanbi—Obito, handle it!” Minato barked.

 “Handle… _what_?” Obito asked. He couldn’t try to calm Kakashi down in a situation like this! He was too worked up himself!

 “Get Kakashi back in control, _now_!” Jiraiya said, taking over Obito’s part of the preparations. “Kushina, get the kid over here!”

 Obito was stunned that Kushina had enough strength left in her to able to rush over to her husband as he ran to Kakashi and Rin intercepted the masked man. The bright green-blue—was teal the word for it? He’d never really figured that out. Why was he thinking about this right now? Was he panicking?—chakra burned at his hands as he tackled the struggling ninja out of the way of an attack by the masked man and then swerved to avoid a stomping fox claw. “Kakashi, stay the fuck with me here!”

 Probably not the right thing to yell to get someone in control of themselves, but it was all he could think of right then. Kakashi’s eyes were wild, the one that was his own flickering between deep gray and a wicked acid green while his Sharingan spun erratically.

 The teal chakra was forming tails now. Shit.

 Obito threw bombs at the masked man as a distraction for Rin, his other hand still pinning Kakashi, and thankfully Rin got behind their opponent and jammed her hand into his neck with what looked like an over-charged chakra scalpel to sever his spine.

 The masked man fell limp, but Kakashi kept thrashing.

 “Go into Kamui!” Kushina yelled. “Use it to get further away! The Sanbi will calm down once it’s away from the fox!”

 “That’s an order!” Minato added.

 “But…Sensei…” Obito said.

 “NOW!” Minato thundered. “We don’t need two running wild!”

 Obito did as he was told and pulled Kakashi into their dimension. As their feet landed on the cubes the foul chakra dissipated and Kakashi fell still.

 “Stay here. I’ll be back,” Obito said, a hand briefly brushing Kakashi’s jaw. He stepped back out again, back on the battlefield, in time to see Kushina’s chakra chains toss Minato and Jiraiya aside as she slammed her hand into the seal.

 Rin was at the corner of his vision, and she shut her eyes at the exact last second. But Obito didn’t and the Sharingan would never let him forget how Kushina stumbled and then fell beside her son, pulling him close as her last breath shakily left her and the fox was sucked into the marks on the boy’s stomach.

 Minato was up as soon as the chains were gone, and he shook his wife’s body, wide-eyed. Jiraiya looked over the masked man, going pale as he pulled odd black rods out of his nondescript face.

 “Chakra receivers,” the sannin said softly. “We were crushed by a _corpse_ someone miles away was controlling.”

 Rin walked over to their sensei and began checking him and little Naruto for injuries. It was clear to everyone there was no reason to check Kushina. She’d given her life to the death god to seal the fox.

 “Check on Kakashi,” Minato said, cradling his son. He looked at Obito, unshed tears in his eyes. “Don’t let him blame himself. Is that clear?”

 “Yes sir,” Obito said, unsure of what else to say. He stepped back into Kamui, letting himself run away for now, and looked at Kakashi.

 “What happened?” Kakashi asked. He wouldn’t even look at Obito.

 “Kushina gave her life to seal the Kyuubi into Naruto. The masked man was some reanimated corpse controlled with weird black jewelry,” Obito said. “Sensei, Rin, Jiraiya, and Naruto should be fine.”

 “I fucked up.”

 “Kakashi, that was why us coming was a last resort, we knew it would happen,” Obito argued.

 “It…it just…it took over,” Kakashi said dully. He put his head in his hands. “I lost control. _Again._ ”

 Obito sat and went to put a hand on his shoulder, but Kakashi flinched away. He sighed, “Not this again.”

 “Obito, this was a reminder. I’m dangerous.”

 “Yes, that’s really going to keep me away from you. I mean, it’s not like I can just teleport after you if you run away or anything. Oh wait, yes I can!”

 “You’d have to know where to find me,” Kakashi said, a hard edge entering his voice.

 “I’d find you.”

 “…I guess,” Kakashi agreed, shifting over to lean against Obito.

 “No guess. I would.”

 It was hours before Obito exited their silent dimension, before he could face the world again.

 Kakashi stayed behind. He needed more time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone confused: It is my fervent belief that even if Madara’s plan to have Obito go off the deep end by seeing Rin die failed, he would have had backups (especially since he had Zetsu around doing things out in the world, including possibly messing with the Uchiha clan in Konoha behind the scenes). Rain still went to shit regardless of Tobi being involved after all (thanks, Danzo, I’ll get to you more later), and Madara simply found another way to reach Nagato and Konan, probably thru Zetsu, to get them on his side and keep his plan going.
> 
> It is also my headcanon that if Nagato reduces the number of Paths of Pain active, he can control a single one at a greater distance and/or give it extra powers (given he can use all the powers himself if no paths are active). This one had the power of the Deva Path (attract and repel), Animal Path (controls animals, tho control of Kurama was poor at best) and the Asura Path (summoning weapons and armor and multiple limbs) through the Asura Path’s body as Nagato would not risk Yahiko’s body (the usual Deva) in this situation. Nagato had no other paths active at this time to increase his range and was somewhere around twenty or thirty miles off. The Konoha group know none of this as the corpse was dead before they got the mask off to see the eyes. Also Zetsu then bonked Nagato on the head (as I’m sure he did with canon!Obito) and informed him you need to seal the Kyuubi LAST so in fact that was a bad idea because now Konoha is going to be protective of its two hosts.
> 
> So. Kushina is dead, Naruto has the Kyuubi, everyone who survived the attack in canon did so in addition to Obito and Rin and Minato. Next chapter we deal with the mourning. Then we'll get back to the more usual tone of the fic.


	27. Mourn

 It rained the day after Kushina died. Or so Kakashi was told. It took three days for Obito to finally get fed up enough to drag him out of the pocket dimension and drop him in their apartment.

 “It wasn’t your fault. Sensei says it wasn’t your fault, damn it,” Obito sighed, running a hand through Kakashi’s hair. “Come on, Kashi, we need you…”

 Kakashi’s arms tightened around himself.

 He knew he was being selfish. He knew Minato and Naruto had lost more than he had. But he was so, so scared. The Sanbi had pushed harder against the seal than ever before, that night. He was worried something could go wrong, especially around Naruto.

 (It had been so confusing. The Sanbi had wanted out once the Kyuubi was free but…but it didn’t want to _fight_ the Kyuubi. It was _jealous_ and wanted to join it.)

 “Keep an eye on him,” Obito told the dogs before heading for the Sarutobi household.

.o.o.o.

 “How is he?” Rin asked.

 “I think he still thinks it was him,” Obito said, taking Naruto from her. “Kakashi’s…I mean…he’s really shut down right now. I think the turtle almost getting out takes a lot out of him, too.”

 “Yeah, between that and sensei having to do so much work in the aftermath and those _idiots_ wanting to go after poor Naruto,” Rin sighed. “…You want me to try?”

 “If you like. You have a key,” Obito said. “Who’s on guard shift with me, anyway?”

 “Asuma’s relieving me in a few,” Rin said. “There’s stored breast milk in the fridge if he gets hungry before Mikoto gets here at two. You’re off shift at six when sensei comes.”

 “Got it,” Obito said. “Anything to keep an eye on?”

 “Nothing outside the usual baby stuff so far,” Rin said. “Good luck.”

.o.o.o.

 The funeral was a week after it happened. Kakashi went since he didn’t want to make Obito feel guilty about not being able to drag him.

 They flanked Rin, who held Naruto. Even now, especially now, they couldn’t risk someone going for the poor kid. Grief made people do stupid things. Like attack babies who did nothing wrong.

 Kakashi looked at his sandals.

 Like hide in your pocket dimension and the apartment for a week and not talk to anyone else who was hurting.

 He felt like trash.

 Sensei finished speaking. Everyone walked up to lay their flowers on the memorial—full of pictures of those who’d died, not just Kushina but people whose buildings were trampled, people who tried to repel the fox…so many people—and Kakashi and his teammates regrouped near their sensei.

 Minato took Naruto gratefully and held him close. “Still sleeping?”

 “I guess he knew it was a solemn occasion,” Obito offered.

 Minato laughed softly, “Smart kid. Come on, let’s go home.”

 Sensei meant his home, of course, and go they did. Kakashi just made sure to keep pace with Obito and Rin, focuses on matching their footsteps.

 “Is there anything in the fridge?” Rin asked.

 “Mikoto sent Shisui on a little grocery run for us,” Minato said. “We’ve got enough for tonight and a little longer. After that I think…I think Naruto’s still safer at the Third’s place for now. With more than just you guys there all day. You can take him back in the morning.”

 Kakashi winced. Sensei looked so sad at having to not be around his son…

 “You’ll get to see him more eventually, sensei. Don’t worry, you’re only missing some diaper changes and feedings,” Obito said. “And you’ve already done those.”

 “Thanks, Obito,” Minato said, managing a smaile that was only slightly strained.

 Kakashi looked over to the mantle. There was a small shrine to Kushina there.

 His chest hurt. He panicked briefly before realizing it wasn’t the seal, just his lungs. That was fine. That was normal.

 Sensei left some incense at the shrine as they settled down for the night. There was a brief interruption as Naruto woke up shortly after the lights went out and shrilly shrieked until he was changed, but then everyone rolled out some sleeping mats. Sensei carefully placed Naruto on the mat next to his while Obito flopped down on the same mat as Kakashi.

 It felt almost like the old campouts they’d had as a team, with the addition of a sleeping baby and the softly spicy smell of incense.

 Kakashi stole a last glance at the dim outline shrine as his eyelid began to get heavy.

  _I’m sorry_.

.o.o.o.

 Naruto only woke them up one more time that night, needing another change and some food. The next time he wanted up was close enough to when they needed to get up anyway and so Minato tended to his son while Rin and the boys worked on breakfast. Kakashi was a half—useless zombie, but he managed to set the table despite it all so Obito called it a win.

 “Did you sleep?” he asked Kakashi.

 Kakashi shrugged, “A little.”

After breakfast Minato kissed Naruto goodbye and then headed for the tower to keep directing reconstruction. Rin carefully wrapped the little boy in a blanket and the three of them set off for the Sarutobi residence.

 “What…what happened in the cave?” Kakashi asked Rin.

 “The masked man showed up. Killed the ANBU and Biwako-sama and the other midwife,” Rin said. “I…I survived by substituting with her corpse. Biwako-sama’s.  Sensei tried to have me take over the seal while he engaged but…but the man somehow got a hold of Naruto and Sensei used Flying Thunder God to get Naruto back but the man threw a bomb at my feet so I tried to move and keep the seal since if I didn’t move and it blew me up the seal would break anyway and-”

 Her eyes were full of tears as she choked on her words.

 “It slipped. As I moved,” she said. “Sensei tried to move back in but it was too late. The…the fox stepped on Kushina, that’s why she was bleeding, she was shielding Naruto…she survived it though…she survived…”

 “That was our Kushina,” Obito chuckled. “Took a lot to put her out from anything.”

 Kakashi stiffened again.

 “And…and Sensei gave me the summoning kunai so he could summon us whole the fox formed. The masked man left, probably to try and get outside and control it…there’s reports of him killing a few people in the streets on his way to the wall,” Rin said. She held Naruto tighter. “Kushina told me to just treat Naruto, to make sure he’d be okay since…you know, bad birth conditions…and then Sensei summoned us and you know the rest…”

 “Shit…” Obito said. “And you think this guy was controlling the Kyuubi?”

 “Yeah,” Rin said. “It…didn’t seem to work so well.”

 “Well we know it wasn’t Madara reincarnate, because, well, redhead,” Obito said jokingly. “Maybe whatever he had wasn’t as effective as Madara’s Mangekyo.”

 “Maybe,” Rin said as they reached the Sarutobi house and knocked. A tired-looking Asuma beckoned them inside.

 “Hokage-sama get to see his kid for a bit?” Asuma asked.

 “Yeah,” Obito said.

 “Mikoto dropped off more milk,” Asuma added. “She’ll be by with Sasuke this afternoon.”

 Obito nodded. They passed a small alter to Biwako as they went to the public study and settled in for the day.

 Kakashi was still kind of a zombie. But it was less of one than he’d been in previous days so Obito had to take it.

.o.o.o.

  _A few days later_

 Minato paused as he reached the Memorial Stone. He’d been planning to make a quick stop on his way to Sarutobi’s to pick up Naruto for the evening. The sun had just gone down so he’d hoped to be alone.

 Kakashi was there, sitting on the ground in front of the stone.

 Minato sped over so he was right behind him, “Kakashi?”

 Kakashi startled, “Sensei!”

 “Hey there,” he said, helping the young man to his feet. “What are you doing out here?”

 “Just…stopping by,” Kakashi said.

 Minato frowned. Obito and Rin had both related how hard it was to get Kakashi to leave the apartment. “And how often have you been doing that?”

 Kakashi shrugged.

 Minato sighed, “And Obito and Rin don’t know?”

 Kakashi winced.

 “It’s not your fault, Kakashi,” Minato said firmly. They’d all told him that at least once. Maybe he needed to explain it better this time. Kakashi had always been hard-headed.

 “It feels like it is,” Kakashi said. “I mean, I think it’s mine.”

 “And I think it’s mine,” Minato said.

 Kakashi stared at him blankly so he continued, “Kushina and I wanted to have a child despite the risks and I was sure I could handle it, could maintain the seal, that we’d thought of everything…and _Obito’s_ mad because he thinks he should have used the seal instead-” he was rewarded by Kakashi choking slightly at that, “-or that if he could use Mokuton properly he could have done more, and Rin thinks if she had just managed to hold the seal a little more of if she’d taken on the masked man while I held the seal it wouldn’t have happened. Jiraiya-sensei thinks if he’d been faster, Hiruzen thinks if he’d been there from the start…”

 He ran his hand through Kakashi’s hair as he pulled the teen in for a hug, “We all think it was us and…and we maybe have a little part in it but we’re all thinking it was us when it was whoever controlled the man in the mask.  That is who the focus should be on. Not us and maybe not even the Kyuubi. This was the man in the mask, Kakashi. _None of us made him come_.”

 His eyes stung with tears and he kept Kakashi pinned against himself long enough to wipe them.

 “I’m still sorry,” Kakashi choked, starting to cry.

 Minato was reminded painfully how _young_ his students were. Kakashi was the youngest and he’d only turned fifteen last month.

 “We’re all sorry,” he said. “That’s why we all need each other. Now come on.”

 “Huh?” Kakashi asked, pulling back.

 “We’re going to go pick up Naruto. Won’t Rin and Obito be so happy to know you finally got out of the apartment to go on a walk with Sensei?” Minato asked.

 Kakashi blinked, “You…you’re not going to tell them?”

 “If you’re going to do this again, _you’re_ going to tell them,” Minato said. “But we’ll let the previous offenses slide. It’s been a hard few weeks for everyone. Come on.”

 He kept an arm around Kakashi’s shoulders as they walked to the Saurotbi household. Kakashi seemed to take some comfort from it.

 “I was scared,” Kakshi admitted as they got close to their destination. “About being around Naruto. But everything’s been fine with the seal.”

 “That’s good. He needs his big brother able to hang around,” Minato said.

 Kakashi shot him a grateful look before they knocked on the door. Rin, hair unusually askew, answered, “Sensei! Hi! Kakashi! …You’re…out and about!”

 “He went for a walk with me, be proud,” Minato said, pushing Kakashi at her.

 “Obito! Kakashi went for a walk! Willingly!” Rin called. She smirked at Minato, “He’s going to be so jealous you’re the one who got him out, you know.”

 “Please. I raised Kakashi since he was six,” Minato said. “I know how to get him out of his room by now.”

 “Sensei!” Kakashi squawked as Obito darted in and hugged Kakashi, cheering at him for “remembering there’s an outside!”

 “So where’s Naruto?” Minato asked.

 “He and Sasuke both woke up. Itachi’s been playing peek-a-boo unil they’re asleep again,” Rin said. “Mikoto’s pumping some more milk.”

 “Ah. And your hair?” Minato asked.

 Rin scowled, “The Third gave Itachi a lot of sweets. He’s glad to get his grandfather act started.”

 “Itachi did that to you?” Minato asked.

 “She chased him all over the house,” Obito said as they got to the study.

 “Itachi, you scoundrel!” Minato scolded as he swooped over to pick up Naruto, who giggled at seeing his dad. Or so Minato hoped. He didn’t quite know when infants began to manage definite facial recognition.

 Itachi rolled his eyes before returning his attention to Sasuke.

 Minato sat next to Mikoto, who was still pumping breast milk, “So, while we’re in the same place: do we think as they get bigger we might need to put Naruto on partial formula?”

 “It’s fine for now,” Mikoto said. “I’m sure heads will have cooled enough for you to find someone else you can trust if you don’t want formula, but by then it shouldn’t hurt too much to start giving the boys both.”

 “Thanks,” Minato said.

 “As f I’d let my best friend’s son starve when she’s not here to feed him,” Mikoto said, shooting him a reassuring grin that still held several strips of classic Uchiha pride.

 “How’s Itachi?” he asked quietly. Mikoto and Fugaku had been out for a nighttime stroll when the Kyuubi got loose. Mikoto had tried to get back to her boys while Fugaku had to go rally the Military Police, but Itachi had already fled for the shelters with Sasuke. The poor kid had ended up running through the streets with an infant for over an hour, well after the attack was over, until Tsume Inuzuka had found him and had one of her clansmen track down his parents.

 “He’s been sleeping with us, for now. Fugaku’s worried about him,” Mikoto said. “Bull helps when we can’t be with him during the day. He’s like a big, warm security blanket.”

 “I’m sure if Itachi wanted to keep him Kakashi and Obito wouldn’t say no,” Minato said.

 “I don’t know,” Mikoto said. “I rather like the Third’s method of giving Itachi a lot of sugar and siccing him on chunin and jonin. Entertaining and he naps for a long while afterwards.”

 “Hmm,” Minato said, setting Naruto in his lap and holding his hands out, “Dog-person Uchiha or Uchiha with a sweet tooth…” He pretended to weigh the options. “Neither’s very conventional.”

 “I think we’re learning that Itachi’s not very conventional,” Mikoto said as Minato picked Naruto back up again. “Should be interesting, seeing how he leads his generation of the clan.”

 “The next generation does look interesting,” Minato admitted, glancing at his students. “I’d better get those three and Naruto to proper beds. Good night.”

 “Here, for the night,” she said, passing him a bottle of breast milk. “You know he wakes up at midnight.”

 “Believe me, I do,” Minato said. “You’ve got an older kid, when does that part stop?”

 “When the baby feels like it,” Mikoto said sagely.

 Minato sighed. “All right then. Come on, Naruto. Let’s get the big kids home!”

 Naruto cooed in agreement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, it's like the universe wanted to traumatize Itachi in early childhood. Even Fugaku's worried now!
> 
> It really helped Kakashi to hear from Minato that everyone else is blaming themselves too. He's starting to come back to himself. Everything's going to be okay. As long as people don't give Itachi too much sugar. 
> 
> Next time we skip ahead around a year or so for Fugaku to serve up some prime comedy in: Clan


	28. Clan

 Time went on. Naruto and Sasuke went from helpless infants to slightly-less-helpless toddlers who clearly had facial recognition skills and favorites—Sasuke’s easily being Itachi by a wide margin. Itachi entered the Academy at age six, like his uncle Obito had. The village was repaired, Sensei learned to juggle politics and parenting with Naruto fully moved into his home, and the Third enjoyed his retirement, while plotting what to do when he had grandchildren.

 Kakashi and Obito increased their number of dogs, with Kakashi taking supreme joy in training a full pack of disciplined ninja hounds. Well, mostly disciplined. The puppies were working on it. And Pakkun would always be Pakkun.

 One day in late February, over a year after the Kyuubi disaster, there was a knock at the door of Kakashi and Obito’s apartment.

 “One second!” Obito yelled, untangling himself from the pile of dogs he’d been wrestling with and running to the door. He tucked his wild, carpet-mussed hair behind his ears before opening it. “Huh? Fugaku? Something wrong?”

 “Is Kakashi here too?” Fugaku asked bluntly.

 “He’s on a grocery run,” Obito said. “Why?”

 “This requires both of you,” Fugaku said. “May I come in?”

 “Oh, yeah sure. Mind Bisuke, he’s still a bit of a biter,” Obito said, pointing at the tan puppy.

 Fugaku raised an eyebrow, “Eight dogs. Planning on rivalling the Inuzuka?”

 “We’d need a kennel for that,” Obito said. “This lot all have to share a room.”

 “And Bull snores,” Pakkun complained.

 “Do not,” Bull huffed. “Ask Itachi. Or Fugaku, since he’s here.”

 “Guys, no fighting,” Obito reminded them. “So, is something bad going on? I know Mikoto made you promise to warn me about stuff like that.”

 “No. Frankly if it was something bad she’d bear the news herself,” Fugaku said.

 “Well, your bedside manner _is_ terrible.”

 Fugaku gave him a dirty look, but Obito didn’t take it back. After all, Fugaku’s reaction to him being alive and with prosthetic limbs made of what-is-this-stuff had been immediately asking “How aren’t you dead?” as a serious question he expected to be answered.

 Actually if he provided that kind of absurd, serious-face-comedy on the regular Obito could see why Mikoto was attracted to him…

 “Anyway, it’s good news. Mikoto would like to bear that too, but this is something that requires my position to deliver,” Fugaku said.

 “Well, I’d have already heard if Sasuke started walking or talking by now…Itachi would be running around telling the whole village…” Obito mused. “What is it?”

 “What part of ‘requires both of you’ did you not hear?”

 “Eh, fine. Guys, be nice to Fugaku while I make tea, okay?”

 “Okay,” Pakkun said. He hopped up onto the table in front of Fugaku. “Want to touch my paw?”

 “I’m fine, thank you,” the clan head said. Somehow the fact that he treated the offer entirely seriously made Obito nearly burst out laughing.

 “Bedhead was right about Bisuke. I think it’s because he can’t talk yet,” Bull added. The puppy gave him a betrayed look. “What? You can’t.”

.o.o.o.

 “You left him with the dogs?”

 “I had to make tea!”

 “ _Why_?” Kakashi asked.

 “Because that’s what you do when you have company!” Obito said, raking his fingers though his shaggy hair out of stress. “You make tea so when everyone talks they have a reason to all be quiet for stretches without it being awkward since they can just drink.”

 “…Huh. I always just saw it as arbitrary, but when you say it like that it makes sense,” Kakashi said as he finished putting away the groceries.

 “I know, right?” Obito said. “So, he says he has good news!”

 “That’d be a first,” Kakashi said. “Feels like a lot of the time we just meander from disaster to disaster. Or at least disaster to crazy babysitting incident.”

 “Pessimist.”

 “I prefer realist,” Kakashi said, taking the tea tray and heading for the den. “Yo.”

 “Kakashi. You didn’t use the front door,” Fugaku noted.

 “He saw you through the front window and came in from the little balcony,” Obito said.

 “With groceries? Five floors up? Maybe you are right for Obito…” Fugaku mused.

 “I don’t think that was a compliment,” Kakashi said.

 “I know it wasn’t,” Pakkun snickered.

 “Out. All of you,” Kakashi said. He sat next to Obito as the dogs went to their room. “So?”

 “Uchiha Obito, you are hereby re-allowed back in the clan compound and reinstated fully as an Uchiha,” Fugaku said.

 Obito choked on his tea. 

 “Nice going!” Kakashi said, patting his boyfriend’s back. “A little warning!”

 “But…he…my eye…his eye… _what_?” Obito demanded.

 “Under the Second Hokage’s tenure bureaucratic code 147 was instated and later amended to code 147-dash-B,” Fugaku said.

 “147…that…shinobi who cohabitate with no others for over two years, uninterrupted in any way, are considered in some form of familial relationship, whether romantic, adoptive, or otherwise?” Kakashi asked.

 “Huh?” Obito asked.

 “And the dash-B which allowed the act to apply to clan members with consent of the clan head,” Fugaku said. “That being me, I approve.”

 “Of?” Obito asked.

 “The fact that because of that code and your known relationship and cohabitation you have entered a common-law marriage unless one of you says otherwise,” Fugaku said. “Kakashi, welcome to the family. Obito, your eye is no longer in someone not considered an Uchiha, so _technically_ there is no longer anything wrong with it.”

 “We’re not even both seventeen,” Kakashi managed. Obito resisted the urge to be smug over the fact that he wasn’t the one who was still sixteen.

 “Yes. I’m shocked you moved in together so young myself, or so quickly, but then I don’t make the rules, I just allow them to work in my favor when possible,” Fugaku said.

 “You’re saying…Kakashi counts as a clan member…because we’ve lived together while in a relationship for two years,” Obito said. “Which makes us _married_.”

 “Common-law only. You’re not entitled to other benefits unless you officiate it somehow,” Fugaku said. “But it works for reinstating you so you can have that.”

 “Fugaku, you just walked in here and told us we got married without trying!” Obito yelled.

 “I know, I was sure someone would have told you sooner,” Fugaku said, sounding honestly amused. “Either they assumed you knew or thought it was funny that you didn’t.”

 “You being in the latter category?” Kakashi asked.

 “Of course not. That would be terrible,” Fugaku said, smirking.

 “Leave,” Kakashi said.

 “Kakashi, don’t be rude!” Obito said.

 “Please leave,” Kakashi amended.

 “ _Kakashi_!”

 “Obito, I got married to you without knowing. I am not dealing with that in front of other people!”

 “He’s not ‘other people’ he’s my cousin-in-law—oh, he’s leaving,” Obito said.

 “Stop by when you work things out. Mikoto wants you over for tea,” Fugaku said, shutting the door.

 “…His bedside manner is still terrible. Springing that on us like that,” Obito sulked. 

 Kakashi just slumped against the couch, “We got _married_. The hell?”

 “Okay, even I know common-law marriages are as much property arrangements as they are relationships in village-terms, he’s just taking advantage. Mikoto probably gave him the idea,” Obito began. “I mean, for one, thing, I sure didn’t get a chance to propose-”

 “Neither did I!”

 “You know, there should be warning labels about that statute.”

 “How?”

 “ _I don’t know_ , but they should be neon orange and very clear that people will consider you married after X amount of time living together!”

 “…Or adopted or some other familial relationship,” Kakashi added.

 “Well, yeah. If we weren’t dating they could use it to declare us brothers or something, I guess,” Obito said. “But...yeah, dating, so guessing that’s a no.”

 “Then that would be creepy.”

 “Yes,” Obito agreed. “So…what now?”

 “Well, other than going and yelling at Sensei for not telling us when he _had_ to have known?” Kakashi asked. He folded his arms and glanced at his sandals. “I have no idea.”

 “…I’d rather wait. On actually being married,” Obito said.

 “Me too,” Kakashi said.

 He looked up when he felt Obito’s hand on his face. Obito hooked his fingers around the mask ad pulled it down. He didn’t kiss him, instead he gently ran his hand along Kakashi’s jaw, tracing over the smooth pale skin and rougher gray marks. Obito leaned in and rested his forehead to Kakashi’s.

 “You know this means we get to be assholes and openly wander around the clan compound and piss off the people who think you shouldn’t have the eye right?” Obito asked, grinning excitedly.

 “…That’s not where I thought this was going,” Kakashi admitted, glancing at how they were pressed against each other.

 “Oh, I want to have sex too,” Obito admitted. “That’s just part of why I’m in such a great mood though. The looks on their faces! Ha!”

 “All right, look, righteous indignation may get you in the mood but you’re killing it for me,” Kakashi said. “Just shut your mouth and go to the bedroom. Okay?”

 Obito nodded silently, but the stupid grin stayed on his face as he pulled Kakashi into their room and shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Exploitation of legal loopholes ftw! So yeah, since ninja life is fraught with peril and unexpected situations and ninja tend to marry young anyway (and can be considered "adults" pretty young too), the time it takes for a common law marriage to occur are WAY shorter. To be fair, Obito or Kakashi could instantly void it if they wanted to, like, "no, bureaucracy, you have misread he relationship" but since it works in their favor they'll let it slide. 
> 
> And Fugaku totally didn't just do this so he has babysitters who can come to the compound lined up once Itachi's on missions and Sasuke is like, four or five. Totally. And Minato totally didn't avoid telling them in advance just so Fugaku can tell him what their faces looked like either. Absolutely not. XD


	29. Growing Up

 As they years passed, Minato’s students grew up. They found their places in the village and as ninja.

 Kakashi remained a jonin. While he never took on a team, he did sometimes offer assistance to jonin who did. His lack of any real affinity and large chakra pools thanks to the Sanbi meant he could reliably be called in to demonstrate just about any jutsu someone was trying to help their genin with, and demonstrate it multiple times as needed.

 As a kid he’d dreamed of ANBU, of surrendering his name of a call sign and being known for what he did, not who he was or who his family was. These days he was proud of his name, and of introducing himself with it to tweak his partner’s more stuck up relatives.

 (“I am never calling myself Kakashi Uchiha,” he’d told Obito one day.

“Oh thank goodness,” Obito had said. “You’d make a worse Uchiha than me!”)

 He couldn’t join ANBU anymore. ANBU needed to be as anonymous as possible, to disappear into the program. That wasn’t allowable when there was a bijuu sealed inside you. The village had to be able to keep track of you.

 He still hung around some ANBU though. For one thing, he’d been working on his swordsmanship and ANBU tended to be some of the better swordsmen around. The other reason was Yamato, an ANBU trainee and former test subject of Orochimaru’s who, like Obito, had the Mokuton. This was enough for Kakashi and Obito to hang around him and try to help him out when it came to non-ANBU things.

 Obito so far hadn’t had as much luck with the Mokuton as Yamato, mostly managing to use simple attacks and grow various kinds of plants and trees. He honestly seemed very fond of the latter activity and was constantly coaxing trees around the village to grow in ways that made them better for kids to climb.

 (Mikoto had never quite forgiven him for doing that with a tree near Sasuke’s window, as it led to her four year old cheerfully wandering around on the roof.)

 Any ability the Mokuton had at managing bijuu and their hosts didn’t seem to be a thing Obito could handle, or if it was it as utterly unconscious and just _happened_ when Obito shook Kakashi out of it when his control began to slip. Obito and Yamato had a few theories, but nothing they were willing to test as of yet. Yamato seemed to be able to use one of the First’s bijuu-control techniques, but had never been around Kakashi when Kakashi’s control was slipping to try it in action.

 Obito was promoted to jonin. Kamui made him a natural at getting in and out of situations quickly and cleanly, making him a major asset for missions like assassinations. For some reason his and Kakashi’s Mangekyo didn’t seem to be affected by encroaching blindness, at least not from Kamui or Obito’s Amaterasu. Kakashi didn’t know if he had Tsukuyomi or not, but he wasn’t inclined towards using it if he did.

Rin continued to study medical ninjutsu and taijutsu, while adding seals to her repertoire since Kakashi was such a frequent patient and Naruto probably would be as well. Obito kept giving her Relationhip IOU books for her birthday, which meant Kakashi and Obito not only weren’t allowed to threaten her dates yet, but weren’t even allowed to stalk them. Kakashi begged Obito to find other gifts—what ind of brothers were they if they couldn’t mess with Rin’s dates?

 Rin ended up being the one to teach Naruto to read. Minato turned out to be dreadful at teaching the very basics, Kakashi was bad at getting books on the right level, and Obito would usually stop the lesson whenever Naruto wanted to play.

Rin ended up taking on a team as their sensei when she was eighteen. Unlike her dates, she was perfectly fine with letting Obito and Kakashi mess with her genin.

(She drew the line at Minato joining in. Her genin didn’t know how to retaliate when trolled by the Hokage).

Gai remained a cheerful occasional fourth member of the team. His time as a special jonin was spent at the Academy, trying to find ways to improve the overall taijutsu abilities of the village’s future generations. After a jonin promotion he had no more time to do that and tried to get Obito and Kakashi to help him start a dojo. Obito pointed out that he could just become a jonin sensei and was hugged very tightly while Gai shouted his gratefulness for the idea loud enough for the whole village to hear. Obito lost hearing in one ear for a few hours, but was glad Gai could continue his love of teaching.

 Shisui Uchiha was forced to mercy-kill his father in the field and developed the Mangekyo. Obito and Kakashi ended up with custody of the poor genin for a month while he worked through it and learned to manage his eyes. He seemed to have some sort of strong suggestive genjutsu where they had Kamui, as a signature technique. Shisui didn’t seem that impressed with it, but considered it a decent backup for when his back was to the wall.

 (As a fellow Uchiha-not-that-into-genjustu, Obito privately agreed.)

  After staying with them, Shisui decided he loved life outside the compound and got an apartment in their building. Itachi didn’t talk to them for several weeks after his best friend moved out. Sasuke finally whined him out of it since avoiding Obito and Kakashi meant avoiding Naruto.

 Naruto and Sasuke turned out to be rambunctious four year olds who had a habit of running wild in whatever location they were currently contained. Even worse was when Kiba Inuzua joined the fray, as Itachi and Hana often had a bad habit of letting all three loose near the Inuzuka kennels.

 (Sentence Fugaku Uchiha never thought he’d say: “Son, a respectable Uchiha Clan Heir does _not_ let his four year old brother attempt to walk a hundred pound dog and get dragged into a river.”)

 Itachi graduated the Academy at age eight, after intentionally flunking the exam when he was seven because he didn’t feel ready. Obito bought him a present anyway, for knowing himself so well. He seemed to generally enjoy his genin team, even if his sensei had trouble handling their very different talents and making them into a unit.

 As for the Sanbi, it seemed to spend almost all of its time just casually bitching in the back of Kakashi’s mind. Kakashi tuned it out unless it felt like being helpful, which usually only happened if they were about to die. It still tried to escape in times of stress, of course, but years down the road that felt more like a routine than anything.

Life was good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a transition chapter. Next time we meet a five year old Naruto, Sasuke, and Kiba and Itachi's off for the chunin exams. Among other things going on. 
> 
> I've always seen Shisui as being a few years older than Itachi. 
> 
> Itachi's like of dogs led to a friendship with Hana. Which led to Sasuke and Naruto befriending Kiba. Which has caused all their parents headaches.


	30. Naruto

 At five years old, Obito’s sensei’s son was a ball of energy. An adorable, smiley ball of energy and destruction and hugs.

 “Naruto, careful!” Obito yelled, just barely yanking the little boy away from the bookshelf he’d crashed into before it could topple onto him. Obito caught the shelf in an even closer call. “Watch where you’re going, pipsqueak!”

 “But I‘m _bored_!” Naruto complained. “Sasuke doesn’t wanna play because he’s saying bye to Itachi and Kaka-nii’s on a mission today and Rin-neechan’s working and Dad’s working and even _Gai’s_ working and you’re hurt and-”

 “Naruto, I have minor chakra exhaustion, nothing big,” Obito laughed. “We can still play. Just…don’t make me chase you too much.” He felt a little winded just from sprinting across the room.

 That was what he got for going overboard on missions, though. And not controlling the Mokuton well and making like a hundred wood posts when he’d meant to make five. Yamato had about smacked him upside the head when he’d heard.

 “Look, how’s about you let big brother Obito tell you a story until big sis Rin gets off work and can let you try to fight her, okay?” Obito tried, sitting down on the couch. “And then Kakashi will probably be back from his day mission before dinner and you can mess with him.”

 Naruto practically catapulted himself into Obito’s lap. “Story time!”

.o.o.o.

 “He’s so much cuter when he’s asleep,” Kakashi sighed, shutting the door to Naruto’s room.

 “You think that about everyone younger than eight; you’ve thought it about _Itachi_ for crying out loud,” Obito pointed out. “And you didn’t get Naruto at full energy. He sparred with Rin for like an hour.”

 “Sparred?” Kakashi asked sarcastically.

 “Okay, ‘rushed at enthusiastically and lost to over and over’ same difference,” Obito admitted.

 “You feeling better?” Kakashi asked.

 “Give me a couple more days and we can go start kicking enemies in the balls again,” Obito said. “Sensei should be done with his diplomatic stuff by then, right?”

 “He’s going nuts, so I hope so,” Kakashi said. “He _hates_ it when he barely gets to see Naruto.”

 “Sensei’s so adorable when he’s in Dad Mode,” Obito snickered. “To be fair, you gave him a decent amount of practice.”

 “Maybe,” Kakashi said. “I was a quieter kid than this, though.”

 “Yeah…probably made Dad Mode worse when I think about it, hard to know what’s up with a quiet kid,” Obito mused.

 “I didn’t get the official Dad Mode. It must have been under development. Or I was testing phase,” Kakashi mused.

 Obito frowned, “…We’re thinking about this too much.”

.o.o.o.

 “Dad!” Naruto cheered as his father entered the house. “You’re home!”

 “And will be for the rest of tonight and tomorrow, barring emergencies,” Minato said, catching his son as Naruto jumped at him. “Obito, feeling better?”

 “Hospital says no missions for another four days but otherwise I’m fine,” Obito replied. “But someone’s little clone has been wearing me out!”

 Naruto leaned out of his dad’s arms and stuck his tongue out at Obito, who stuck his out right back.

 “Sensei, I need to be paid more as I’m clearly babysitting more than one child,” Kakashi said, looking up from organizing his weapons.

 “Or paid less for having so many sharp objects around my son,” Minato pointed out.

 “They’re on the counter, he can’t reach without jumping and I’d see him do it,” Kakashi reasoned.

 “Well, I’m the one who’s going to have multiple kids to deal with. Naruto, Sasuke’s coming over tomorrow morning. Maybe Kiba, too,” Minato said.

 “Yes!” Naruto cheered.

 “Maybe that’ll keep Sasuke entertained while Itachi’s at the chunin exams,” Obito mused.

.o.o.o.

 Minato chuckled. Sasuke was clearly not entertained. He was downright entertainment-less.

 Naruto and Kiba tried everything they could think of, but Sasuke clearly just wanted to sulk and miss his brother for the day. He probably should have stayed home, since Naruto and Kiba had endless energy to dedicate to trying to cheer him up.

 Which was probably only making Sasuke’s mood worse, nw that he thought about it, “Okay, guys. Let’s let Sasuke just have some time, okay?”

 “Okay, fine,” Naruto said, sighing hugely. Kiba didn’t look as convinced but went with it anyway.

 Minato kept Sasuke in his peripheral vision as he started playing cards with the boys. Roughhousing would have to wait—he couldn’t play-fight Naurto and Kiba while keeping an eye on Sasuke over on the porch.

 Naurto was already turning into quite the cardshark. Minato didn’t know where he got it. Sometimes it seemed almost like supernatural luck which, admittedly, Naruto could use sometimes. Exactly how one cardsharked at simple Rummy he did not know but Naruto managed just fine.

 “It’s not like Itachi’s gone forever,” Naruto muttered. “He’ll win chunin and come back. Easy.”

 “If he makes the finals he’ll be gone a little over a month, Naruto,” Minato scolded. “That’s a long time for Sasuke t not see his brother.”

 Plus having two Uchiha clan heirs in a foreign village was a bit big of a risk, so Sasuke couldn’t even go see Itachi compete if he was in the finals. Unless Fugaku freed up his schedule enough to be there for Sasuke, even Mikoto probably couldn’t go to Suna for the tournament without Sasuke feeling utterly abandoned even if Obito tried to fill the gaps.

 “So why couldn’t he wait for a chunin exam here?” Kiba asked.

 “His whole team was ready,” Minato said patiently. “So Itachi went to Suna. As he gets older he make take even longer missions. It’s part of shinobi life. Itachi’s probably going to take a week off once he’s home and play with Sasuke then. We give exam passers that option.”

 Naruto grinned widely and Minato wondered what what he’d said to excite his son, “We can get Itachi back for making Sasuke sad!”

 “No. No I did not say anything like that,” Minato said as Naruto ran over to Sasuke. “Naruto!”

 “Sasuke, Sasuke! You know how Itachi’s going to totally win at being a chunin?” Naruto asked.

 “What?” Sasuke asked. “Do you mean you think he’ll be okay?”

 “Yeah, he’s totally going to make chunin,” Naruto said. “I mean, it’s _Itachi_. And do you know what that means?”

 Sauske sighed, “No, Naruto. What does it mean?”

 Naruto grinned and folded his arms, “We get to steal his chunin vest and dye it _neon purple_.”

 Sasuke blinked, “Itachi looks really bad in neon.”

 “Yuh-huh,” Naruto agreed.

 “And…and he doesn’t like purple at _all_ ,” Sasuke said, grinning.

 “He’s going to know you mean business!” Naruto said.

 Minato cocked his head. What was Naruto talking about? Meant business? About _what_? Oh to understand the logic of five year olds.

 “Yeah!” Sasuke said, jumping to his feet. “And, and, if he won’t train me…I’ll dye it again!”

 “Yellow!” Kiba suggested.

 “Yeah! Neon yellow!” Sasuke said.

 “You got it!” Naruto said.

 Minato chuckled. That hadn’t been where he was going with that _at all_.

.o.o.o.

 “You okay, Sensei?” Obito asked.

 “Obito, we do not poke the Hokage with a stick,” Rin said as she set the table.

 “Okay yeah but he looks wiped out,” Obito said. “Hey, Kakashi, got any ideas?”

 “I’m dead. Paperwork could not do it but three five year olds could,” Minato grumbled.

 “Hey, Naruto you beat the Hokage. Guess you’re Hokage now,” Kakashi said brightly.

 Minato sprang to his feet, “Kakashi Hatake if you sic my five year old on this village I swear I will…will…”

 “You can’t think of anything you’d do that Naruto wouldn’t copy, only worse?” Obito asked.

 “I’m so proud and so terrified,” Minato joked. “Where’s Daddy’s Little Terror?”

 “Gai’s showing him how to make curry,” Rin said. “We, uh…think we got your yard mostly fixed.”

 “Thanks,” Minato said. “You know what? Bring on the politics. I can handle anything if I survived today!”

 “Yeah, they were pretty rambunctious,” Obito said. “Trying to cheer up Sasuke?”

 “It worked,” Minato said as Naruto careened out of the kitchen yelling that dinner was ready. “All right, kiddo, we hear you.”

 “Thanks for staying home today, Dad!” Naruto said.

 “You’re welcome, Naruto. Make sure you thank the Third for covering for me, okay?” Minato asked.

 “Yeah!” Naruto said. “Of course I’ll thank the Old Man!”

 Minato groaned. Naruto seemed incapable of calling the Third anything else. “You…you do that.”

 Gai brought out the curry and gladly served it before loudly telling them all about his day with his students. Then Rin told them about her team’s day, including Kakashi dropping them all in a pit trap for a “reflex test” before he'd left for his mission. Obito had spent most of his day resting though apparently he’d heard some of the vest-dying plans and heartily approved for…whatever reason that Obito understood but Minato still didn’t.

 “So, back to paperwork tomorrow?” Kakashi asked.

 “Yeah. Hey, Naruto, how about you brin your old man some ramen for lunch tomorrow?” Minato asked.

 “Sure, I can do that…Obito-nii, can you pay for the ramen?” Naruto asked.

 “Sure thing, kid,” Obito said. “We’ll take the dogs on a nice run tomorrow morning and then have ramen with your dad.”

 Minato gave him a grateful nod. It was hard balancing parenting and being the Hokage, but his students made it a lot easier.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not entirely sure as to the boys' logic WHY Itachi's going to have a frequently dyed chunin vest, only that he WILL have one. 
> 
> If you're wondering why Naruto was asleep and then awake when Minato got home, he's five. It was a nap. 
> 
> Team Minato plus sometimes Gai and Yamato help Minato juggle his dad duties with his Hokage ones. Sarutobi helps as well by taking a day or two a month to do the routine stuff so Minato can have a day off. 
> 
> So Itachi's at the chunin exams, we'll see him again in a chapter or two. Unlike cnaon where he apparently comehow got permission to compete without a team, he went with a team here. Idk why canon added that detail, maybe to make him more loner-y? It's a detail from "Itachi Siden: Book of Light". Anyway, he has a team. His sensei is Shibi Aburame. I just think someone that chill but tactical and with a good heart would be good for Itachi.
> 
> But that's for later: Next time! Obito and Kakashi take little Naruto on stakeout training!


	31. Brothers

 “You know, I think she might be out of coupons by now…” Obito mused as they got comfortable on the roof.

 “Would have been out by last year if you didn’t keep giving her more on her birthdays,” Kakashi scoffed. “I swear, you don’t even actually want to mess with her dates, do you?”

 “I want Rin to be happy… _but_ I think vetting her dates is part of that,” Obito said.

 “Why’re you sending her dates to the vet?” Naruto asked.

 “To make sure they’re nice and healthy for Rin of course!” Obito said, beaming.

 “You’re weird, Obito-nii,” Naruto muttered.

 “You’re cute, little brother,” Obito cooed back, ruffling Naruto’s hair. The blonde swatted at him.

 “So do we know who she’s dating?” Kakashi asked, pulling Naruto away from Obito and tossing the boy in the air. Naruto cheered as he dropped back into Kakashi’s hands.

 “Again! Kaka-nii, again!”

 Kakashi obliged him, still waiting on Obito’s answer.

 “Well, at first I thought she’d maybe gotten back together with the librarian,” Obito said.

 “The _librarian_? He only lasted one date!” Kakashi said, scoffing.

 “Yeah, which is why I was wrong,” Obito said. “So then I wondered if she was with Genma, but no dice, and that grean-haired chunin, well she’s seeing someone else by now. So I asked Kurenai since she hangs out with Rin, and Kurenai said—ack!”

 “Naruto!” Kakashi scolded. The kid had jumped out of his arms at an entirely unprepared Obito, sending them both flat against the roof tiles. “Tell Obito you’re sorry for not warning him.”

 “Sorry, Obito-nii,” Naruto said, sulking. 

 “Yeah, apology accepted,” Obito groaned, sitting up. “Anyway, she said she doesn’t know, but Rin might be meeting them for training near the Forest of Death. And so, we are here!”

 “Naruto, remember, we’re not actually in the forest, and that’s why it’s okay we brought you,” Kakashi said, eyeing the gates. “You do not ever, ever go in there until your dad gives the go-ahead.”

 “Right!” Naruto agreed. “And we’re here because Rin-neechan has a date and because we’re her brothers we take her date to the vet!”

 “Exactly!” Obito said. “Good job!”

 “…Where is the vet, Obito-nii?” Naruto asked. “Kiba knows, but I don’t.”

 “We’ll get to that when we come to it,” Obito said quickly.  

 “Now Naruto, we’re going to be practicing ninja observation skills, okay?” Kakashi asked, pulling the kid into his lap as he sat down. “Be quiet, but let us know if you see something.”

 Naruto nodded, grinning. He formed binoculars using his hands and started to peer out over the ground.

 It was so adorable Obito had to resist the urge to coo again. Then Naruto would just take another swing at him.

 “Smell anyone coming yet?” he asked because Kakashi’s nose was frankly going to be their first tip off.

 Kakashi shook his head. “Nah, but then we were only given a general time. Might be here a while.”

 “Yeah, that’s the thing, Naruto, stakeouts…they get boring right quick,” Obito admitted, still scanning the area. “Still got to do them.”

 “What’s the longest you ever waited on a stakeout?” Naruto asked.

 “Days,” Kakashi said. When Naurto’s eyes went wide and panicky he quickly added, “This won’t be days, of course. Think of it as training.”

 Naruto hunkered down at once. He loved training. The boy had more of Kushina’s talents than Minato’s and that meant his potential was great but also behind walls that could only be climbed with a lot of practice. Obito understood this better than anyone, and Kakashi understood it pretty well thanks to back when the Sanbi shot his chakra control to hell.

 Obito wrapped an arm around Naruto as they waited.

 Kakashi suddenly turned, “That way.”

 Naruto and Obito squinted. Obito glanced at Kakashi, “What do you smell? Rin and someone else?”

 “Yeah but the other person…I guess they’re here a lot or something but it’s harder to pick them out,” Kakashi mused. “They smell like this place…”

 “Weird,” Naruto said.

 “Yeah, weird,” Obito agreed. “I mean…holy shit.”

 “No cursing around Naruto, Sensei will hang us,” Kakashi said despite his tone being as stunned as Obito’s.

 “…That’s Anko,” Obito said.

 “Yep,” Kakashi said.

 “Who’s Anko?” Naruto asked.

 “Someone we’d have to work our butts off to properly scare as Rin’s brothers,” Obito sighed. “What does she fear? Dango shortages?”

 “We’ll work on it,” Kakashi said. “I’m sure if Rin ever introduces us to her we’ll eventually pick up on something…”

 Obito frowned, “Of course if we go too far Kurenai will murder us.”

 “Too true,” Kakashi said. “Come on, Naruto. We have our info, so mission complete.”

 They used Kamui to skip a few roofs over before heading towards their apartment.

 “Well,” Obito said at around the halfway mark. “I suppose if they get married the most appropriate wedding present would be Orochimaru’s carcass?”

 Kakashi’s expression informed him that he was an idiot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this one done before I finished the previous so enjoy another quick update! Next one's a bit longer (it deals with Itachi coming home and what happened in Suna)


	32. Kindred I: Sand

 “Mikoto, I thought the party was tonight,” Obito said as soon as he opened the door to his cousin’s frantic banging. His eyes widened at how harried she looked.

 “Itachi needs to talk to both of you now. Fugaku took him to see the Hokage,” she said tightly. “He’s…upset.”

 “He made chunin, why’s he upset? Didn’t he just get home?” Kakashi asked as they both pulled on their sandals.

 “Something about bijuu,” she said, dropping her voice. “I need to get back to Sasuke, he doesn’t know why his brother was so rattled. Shisui can only keep him calm for so long.”

 Obito nodded and grabbed an unsuspecting Kakashi, dragging them both through Kamui to get to Minato’s office.

 Itachi jumped when they appeared, and Fugaku put a steadying hand on his son’s shoulder. The kid must have been shaken up to react like that. Minato looked concerned, but his gaze was only for Itachi.

 “This about bijuu?” Kakashi asked warily after a few moments of no one speaking.

 “I…I met someone,” Itachi said, clearly trying to collect himself. “He was a little kid, we hung out a bit…in Suna, that is, for the chunin exams-”

 “Collect yourself, take your time,” Fugaku told his son. “Itachi played with a young boy in Suna. That boy was incredibly isolated and lonely and powerful, something about controlling sand. He is also the Kazekage’s youngest son.”

 “He’s like _you_ , uncle, I know it,” Itachi told Kakashi, now more controlled. “Like you and Naruto and everyone…they just…”

 A jinchuuriki, Kakashi realized. A human bijuu container.

 “I can’t stop thinking about it. How he was treated. If...if someone treated Naruto like that…or Sasuke…or you,” Itachi said, glancing at Kakashi.

 “That big heart’s going to get you in trouble one day,” Kakashi said, putting a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

 “So now we know the identity of Suna’s only host,” Minato sighed. “And that the poor kid is probably going through hell due to control issues.”

 “I’m not sure why you had us come,” Obito said. “Was it because Itachi might be…weird around Kakashi?”

 Itachi gave him a deeply offended look so Obito had to assume that guess was wrong.

 “No, it’s about the boy,” Minato said. “Kakashi, your status is generally known. Mist was not stingy on sharing what they did.”

 “And making themselves look like morons for giving up the Sanbi once people realized Kakashi was still alive,” Obito added, smirking.

 “I want to put out some feelers to try and gauge the Kazekage’s mood on this,” Minato said. “He’s a father, I’m sure he must care for his boy at least a little bit. If I think they would accept help, I want to offer for the two of you to go to Suna and see if you can help the boy with control.”

 “Would they really go for that?” Kakashi asked. “Most people don’t invite containers. You know, the whole ‘might release the bijuu once inside the village’ thing.”

 “This is true,” Minato said. “But I want to offer all the same. I just want your opinions on it first.”

 Kakashi suppressed a shudder when he thought about how it got in his head when the Sanbi was more active, how hard it was to stay in control. How happy he was that Naruto hadn’t seemed to hear a peep out of the Kyuubi so far. If a _child_ was having problems, having it worse than he was… “I’d be willing to give some advice if it’s applicable.”

 “And I’m no you or Jiraiya but I know a lot about seals for bijuu by now,” Obito said. “And since I’m not you and Jiraiya they may see me as a less threatening person to give it.” 

 “Exactly,” Minato said. “I’m glad you saw that coming.”

 “So what do you mean by control issues?” Kakashi asked Itachi.

 “There’s this sand and it…it lashes out a lot,” Itachi said. “I could dodge it just fine! I mean Sasuke’s been throwing shuriken at me for months now, so, yeah…”

 “They’re not sharp,” Fugaku assured everyone. “Sasuke just wants to train in shurikenjutsu like his brother, so we got him practice stars.”

 “But, anyway, we hung out a little on my days off from training. Looks like he’s left to his own devices a lot. Sort of like Kiba when his mom and Hana are busy, except not very good at getting other kids to play with him for…obvious reasons,” Itachi said. “And…well…I kind of missed playing with Sasuke so…I was fine with playing with him?”

 He rubbed the back of his head nervously. “He was…just a little kid. Think he’s a few months younger than Naruto.”

 “That fits the information we have on the Kazekage’s family,” Minato said. “All right. I’ll write the Kazekage. Dismissed.”

 “Sensei’s not going to get in trouble, right?” Itachi asked.

 “Shibi won’t get in trouble,” Minato said. “It’s normal to allow genin to roam around public areas of villages the visit for chunin exams. I assume yu just told him you were playing with a local kid?”

 “Yes,” Itachi said.

 “Then we’re fine,” Minato said.

.o.o.o.

 “So…how many tomatoes do I owe Sasuke?” Itachi asked his father guiltily as they all headed to the Uchiha compound to finally have a celebratory dinner.

 “You gave us all quite a scare…let’s go with a whole crate,” Fugaku said.

 Itachi blanched, “Father! He’d never be able to eat them all before they went rotten!”

 “Then he can use the rotten ones to prank you later,” Fugaku said. “Also we clearly need to work on your ability to communicate when emotional.”

 Obito frowned as something occurred to him.  

 “You didn’t…get overly upset while still in Suna, right?” Obito asked. Itachi being panicked and that far from home was…disconcerting. Chunin or not, he was ten. It also may have given something away to the Suna ninja…

 “No,” Itachi said. “I…I didn’t even really think that much on it while I was there. It was just something I did whenever I was taking a break. But when I was trying to figure it out on the way home…trying to figure out what to say about it…it sort of all came together and just overwhelmed me.”

 “Probably a good thing you didn’t realize it while you were there,” Kakashi said. “Could have gotten dicey.”

 “Uncle?” Itachi asked quietly. “Do…people treat _you_ badly for it?”

 “No too much, no,” Kakashi said. “Or at least not so I’ve noticed much. A few people seem scared, but that’s normal for a lot of powerful ninja. People are scared of your other uncle and your cousin Shisui too, sometimes. And Shisui’s only a few years older than you.”

 “And…Naruto?” Itachi asked.

 Kakashi bit his lip, “There’s a reason we don’t like to leave him alone. The Sanbi was virtually unknown to Konoha before being sealed in me. The Kyuubi…”

 Itachi sighed, “But…he’ll be all right?”

 “He has us,” Kakashi said. “And as people see us with him, see us treating him as a person, they ease up. Besides, he’s got one advantage over me: he’s cute.”

 Itachi snorted slightly. “He does have the second best puppy eyes in the Leaf.”

 “And given his tendency to compete with Sasuke he may be training to surpass you brother,” Kakashi said, adding a little dramatic flourish to his tone the end of the sentence. It made Itachi snicker.

 “I feel so sorry for whatever Academy sensei we sic them on,” Obito sighed, smiling.

 “Thanks for the goggles,” Itachi added, adjusting them around his neck. “They really helped with the sand.”

 “Yeah, I thought they might,” Obito said. “You know, Fugaku, our clan really needs to work on the eye protection standards.”

 “I am not making goggle rules,” Fugaku said, rolling his eyes.

 “Oh come on!” Obito said. “It makes so much sense!”

 “ _No_ , Obito,” Fugaku said.

.o.o.o.

 Minato tapped his pen against his chin. This was a very delicate letter. It had to be subtle, of course, lest it be intercepted and more people find out about the Kazekage’s son. Discretion would be appreciated. But it needed to be polite discretion, and not sound like he was trying to blackmail Rasa over this.

 Minato knew he’d be suspicious if someone just up and wrote him about Naruto…

 Well, suspiciousness couldn’t be helped.

 If the kid was a host, then his actions were probably monitored and Itachi playing with him had probably been noted. Especially if Itachi had dodged accidental lash-outs. That could look suspicious all on its own, with Madara’s rumored ability to control bijuu.

 He decided to go for casual. Father-to-father.

  _Rasa,_

_I have been informed one of my shinobi took time out of the chunin exams to play with your son, Gaara. He sounds like a very sweet boy. Reminds me of my son, Naruto, and my student Kakashi. Itachi mentioned he was having some chakra control issues. I know that can get a bit crazy when kids have unusually large chakra pools—my wife was the same way, as is my son._

_If perhaps you were looking for assistance, Kakashi is willing to share some suggestions. Believe me, I know how hard it is keeping track of children while being a kage—and you have three! I don’t know how you do it. Naruto alone runs me ragged. Maybe you have better stamina?_

_Please let me know if you’d like to see Kakashi to discuss this._

_Minato Namikaze, Fourth Hokage of Konoha_

 It was probably the best he could do. He’d have to have it hand-delivered, most likely. Gai could probably do it. No one would expect him to deliver a discreet message and he could make it to the desert very quickly.

 This could be good, not only for the poor kid but for the alliance between their villages. A real win-win situation. He didn’t get those as often as he’d like, so he hoped it went well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, got another multipart section! Despite my routinely stating the chunin exams were in Suna, no one seemed to think I had ULTERIOR MOTIVES....which I did. Tiny Not-Yet-Traumatized Gaara, meet Itachi! Itachi, meet the third host you'll meet in your life and have implications about the other two you know hit you like an angry Might Gai. 
> 
> Since Itachi's a prodigy, Shibi spent the least amount of time prepping him for the finals compared to his teammates. Itachi thus had a lot of free time and ended up running into a slipped-away-from-Yashamaru (as any four to five year odl can do in a moment) Gaara. They met up a few more times on purpose after that, you'll get more next time in Kidred II: Yashamaru.


	33. Kindred II: Yashamaru

They were still on Fire County land, but Kakashi was very on edge.

 There was every reason to be. Generally speaking ninja villages did not say “send your jonin to meet my jonin” except for _very_ special circumstances. And while that was what these were, it was unnerving. Especially because part of the reason for this meeting was for the Suna jonin to meet a Konoha jinchuurikki. It made his insides squirm.

 The Kazekage’s first reply to Minato had been cautious, but interested. If the bijuu had been sealed into Gaara at birth as it had been for Naruto, then he’d been dealing with this problem for nearly five years. Minato had kept his tone inviting and calm, and the Kazekage had suggested this meeting. Kakashi and an escort—Obito, naturally—to meet one Suna jonin and discuss the problem frankly in person, without fear of a message being intercepted.

 It could be very good for the alliance. It could get the Kazekage in their debt and might save Suna—and anyone that kid dealt with later in life—some grief on top of helping out a young child. 

 “How’s Mr. Turtle?” Obito asked as they entered the town.

 “Sulking.” The Sanbi had woken up at news of another of its kin, but the fact that there would be no fight and no contact with the other container had irked it into a fit of very heavy pique. Kakashi was so far successfully ignoring it.

**Keep telling yourself that, brat**

 So far.

 “Better than raging.”

 “Eh,” Kakashi said, shrugging. Raging was only hard if his own focus was compromised beforehand. Otherwise it was just mildly annoying.

  **Oh _really_ now? Are you sure about that?**

 Yes, he was. And if the Sanbi wasn’t going to contribute helpfully then he was going to stop responding to it at all.

  **…If something is wrong with Shukaku it is my business**.

Hmm. That was useful. Good to know. So if the seal is somehow wrong could it be hurting the beast as well as the host?

  **I don’t do seals, mutt.**

 “Sanbi’s worried about Shukaku but doesn’t do seals so he’ll probably be commenting the whole time but may or may not be able to directly help,” Kakashi said.

 “And you’ll let him?” Obito asked. “Wait, Shukaku? He means the Ichibi? Shukaku has a name? Does the Sanbi?”

 Kakashi sighed at the low growl reverberating in his mind. “I think he’s offended that never occurred to us.”

 “Sorry, Sanbi,” Obito offered, sincerely contrite. “He can hear me, right?”

  **You are both idiots**.

 “Yeah and he thinks we’re stupid,” Kakashi chuckled.

 “He’ll get over it,” Obito said.

 They found their way to the well that had been described to them as a good meeting location. Obito took the time to refill their canteens while Kakashi kept watch. A few traders came and left the well before they were approached by a man with a Suna headband. His face was overed by a veil.

 “This way,” he said.

 “Hold on,” Obito said. “What this about?”

 “Gaara,” the man said bluntly.

 Kakashi and Obito shared a look. Good enough. If it was a trap then they would escape with Kamui. They followed the man to a secluded little alley. Kakashi leaned against the wall as Obito casted a genjutsu to hide them from passerby. The Suna jonin remained at attention.

 “So you know who we are, but we don’t know you,” Kakashi said.

 The man nodded and pulled off his face wrap. He looked very feminine, with sandy blonde hair.

 “My name is Yashamaru. I am the Kazekage’s brother in law and Gaara’s primary caretaker,” he said. He let his shoulders relax slightly, but the rest of him stayed tensed.

 The Kazekage’s brother in law? Well, nice to know the Kazekage was taking this as seriously as Sensei was.

 “…So who’s watching Gaara now?” Obito asked.

 Yashamaru grimaced, and the reason for his tension became clear. “His father will prevent any incidents. But we should probably make this quick.”

 That bad? Kakashi wondered just how much the thing was affecting the poor kid in the equation. “Then let’s get down to business. What do you already know?”

 “You are the container of the Sanbi, and rumor has it your Hokage’s son holds the Kyuubi, rumor that has been somewhat confirmed by the wording of the Hokage’s letters,” Yashamaru said. “Naruto has had his from birth given his birthday, you had the Sanbi implanted at the age of…thirteen?”

 Kakashi nodded.

**So how long’s that been, anyway? Is it a decade yet?**

 No, only six years. Seven soon-ish.

  **Urrrrrgh.**

 “Also outside of the incident four years ago, Konoha has not had a tailed beast attack since the defection of Madara Uchiha while the others…have had less luck” Yashamaru said awkwardly.

 Kakashi nodded. There were rumors the Hachibi had a bad habit of rampaging in Cloud now and then, and the “natural disasters” that had a bad habit of befalling Iwa and Kiri sounded similar enough.

 “Sounds about right,” Obito said. “But there haven’t been any rampages from Suna to hear of...”

 “No there haven’t,” Yashamaru said politely.

 The implication was loud and clear. They’d had them. But they’d been hidden.

 “What’s Gaara’s seal like?” Obito asked. “I know you can’t give secrets, but basics?”

 “I don’t know so much about it,” Yashamaru sighed. “Not really one for seals.”

 “More of a guard?” Kakashi asked, trying to recall if this man was known to Konoha at all.

 Yashamaru let out a soft huff of laughter, “Assassin, actually. I’m stunned to find myself doing so well at childcare.”

 Kakashi could relate. His dogs had somehow made him a very sought after babysitter for the parents of Naruto and Sasuke’s generation once he’d been caught with the mutts and boys at the park. Much to his shock, small children seemed to like him along with the dogs.

 “Huh. Well, find out if it’s even point or not and see if you can have someone correct it if it’s not. Even point seals are better for this,” Obito said, apparently dredging up everything their sensei and Kushina had taught him about sealing the tailed beasts. “It also might help to try and train Gaara’s control, I’m sure you’re trying already but, um, our…source-”

 “The ten year old Uchiha. Itachi. I know who he is,” Yashamaru said.

 “Oh?” Obito asked.

 “He was a foreign ninja around Gaara,” Yashamaru shrugged. “I had all available information on him in my hand within an hour. Also I commend his sand-dodging abilities.”

 Kakashi recalled Itachi’s mention that Gaara couldn’t control his powers well and suddenly realized just how often they must have acted up before Itachi came to that conclusion.

  **Ha.**

 “Fine, well, anyway, he said Gaara is constantly nervous and feels alone,” Obito said. “That’s bad. Fix it. Both help the bijuu.”

 “You need to remind him he’s not alone, that you care about him,” Kakashi said. “The best way to get him to stop hurting others is to find ways to lessen his fear of it.”

 “Voice of experience?” Yashamaru asked.

 Kakashi held his gaze but said nothing. A ninja did not admit weakness.

  **Mutt. You’ve been terrified I’ll kill your friends since day one. Which you should be! I, the great-**

 Kakashi tuned him out. The bragging rants tended to go on forever and so far the Sanbi had yet to be useful regarding Shukaku.

 “So, check the seal and work on his self-esteem?” Yashamaru said.

 “And his bonds,” Obito said. “The former Kyuubi host, they always said bonds with others, that it helped with control. Replacing fear and hate with love.”

 Kakashi briefly brushed Obito’s hand, letting him know the message was received loud and clear. He was glad to be properly ignoring the Sanbi right now since the turtle usually had some snarky comments about his love life.

 “So what do we do when Gaara’s lack of control quite literally endangers those around him?” Yashamaru asked.

 “You’re still alive,” Obito noted. “So is Itachi.”

 “…Good point,” Yashamaru admitted. “But the two people I think could help the most are Gaara’s siblings, neither of whom is as skilled.”

 “So there’s absolutely nothing you can do about the sand? No contingencies?” Obito asked. “I get not telling them to us, totally, but you don’t have any?”

 “None that a six and seven year old can use,” Yashamaru said.

 “But can someone else use it for them?” Kakashi said. “Say, let’s pretend lightning techniques work against the sand, for the sake of argument. You could have a trusted ninja nearby to deal with the sand if it becomes a problem. Gaara would probably also have better control knowing there’s a contingency in place and he doesn’t need to be panicky about hurting his siblings while they wouldn’t be nervous if they knew about it too.”

 “That could work, actually,” Yashamaru mused. “Hmm…I might be able to do something there…”

 He glanced at Kakashi, “I…would understand if you considered this overstepping, but…has Naruto Namikaze had similar…issues?”

 “None that we’ve seen,” Kakashi said. “Which is why we think the seal may be faulty. Mine was a bit of an…irregular job, and I have had more control issues than Naruto.”

 “I could have guessed, from what reports we’ve heard,” Yashamaru said. “Well. We’ll have to see to the seal, then.”

 “I suppose you will,” Kakashi said.

 “Thank. For this. If it helps,” Yashamaru said. His face softened, “I really do love my nephew, you know. I’ll personally be quite grateful.”

 “You’re welcome,” Obito said.

 “…Ah, I trust you could give this to your clansman?” Yashamaru asked, holding out a card. “To Itachi?”

 Obito took it. “You…understand I’ll have to look at this before handing it to a ten year old clan heir.”

 “Oh, of course,” Yashamaru said. He frowned and wagged his finger, “But be careful. Gaara worked hard on it and I don’t want it damaged.”

 “Sure,” Obito said, slipping it out of the envelope and checking it over. Everything seemed fine. And cute. “All right. I’ll make sure he gets it.”

 “Good,” Yashamaru said. “That’s good. Farewell.”

.o.o.o.

 Obito gave the card to Itachi as soon as he was back in Konoha. It was fairly simply card, red crayon and decorative white sand glued on heavy gray paper. The sand made a smiling face and the crayon shakily spelled out _Itachi_ , _Thank You For Being My Friend, Gaara_.

 Itachi proudly displayed it on his dresser.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for this subplot for now, have to give Yashamaru and Rasa time to text some approaches. We'll hear more about Gaara in the future. 
> 
> Next time Konoha turns its gaze inward, to a certain orphan who REALLY needs some help. Might be a bit more time before that update as the next plotline's a mite complicated!


	34. Root I: Kabuto

“I think I’ve done all I can do,” Obito admitted, sighing. “I know that’s not like me, Sensei, but it feels like unless something else changes I’m not going to make any headway.”

 “It doesn’t sound like you,” Minato agreed. “That bad?”

 “The clan elders all think I’m just your pawn to keep the head family in check and that I’ve clearly thoroughly corrupted Itachi to keep the next generation of clan leadership firmly under your control. Don’t get me started on what they think of Kakashi, because then I’ll get worked up and want to just go chuck the assholes into Kamui,” Obito sighed. “I’m sorry, Sensei. But unless they think something being done to help them, to help the clan and its reputation, they’re not going to budge anymore on this issue.”

 “Damn,” Minato said. Fugaku had been working with him on opening the Uchiha up a bit as a clan with attempts to entice more non-Uchiha into the police force and Mikoto had been pushing a few more village charity works, but there was only so much they could do without appearing compromised. “There is of course, the elephant in the room.”

 “Yeah. We could try doing something about that, I guess,” Obito said. “Kakashi and I could see if we could just leave him in Kamui for long enough to starve, or something…”

 “Danzo probably carries a month’s worth of sealed rations in case you do,” Minato said. “And likely has several very bad contingencies in place if he just suddenly ‘disappears.’ No. We need to do this where everyone sees it.”

 “…You have a plan to take down Danzo publicly?” Obito asked, so stunned he actually sat upright out of his dejected slump. “How?”

 “Root,” Minato said. “I have received some intel that it has been restarted, secretly. As well as some intel that Danzo may have been involved in the experiments that got Orochimaru banished.”

 “Wouldn’t be a shocker,” Obito said. “Given some of what Yamato described. What the source?”

 “A former agent of his whose son he recruited,” Minato said. “Rather…forcibly, so she would not have to go instead. She runs the orphanage out by the northern wall. Her name is Nonou Yakushi, the boy’s name is Kabuto.”

 “This is Nonou’s file?” Obito asked as Minato handed him some papers. “Wow. Lot of infiltration missions…classified stuff…you know I’m only a pretty recent jonin, right, sensei? Like, my security clearance is pretty low, I don't normally do intelligence stuff...”

 “You have clearance for this mission,” Minato said. “Nonou has not seen her son in nearly five years and is suspicious of the fact that he has never been allowed to visit, not even for a day. Danzo has sent her photos, but for all we know they’re fake. I want you and Kakashi to take them to Hiashi Hyuuga—he was always good at vetting photographs during the war. If he thinks it’s been altered in any way, tell me. Then assemble a team of your choosing to find this boy. Nonou gave us a shirt of his she saved.”

 “Understood, sensei,” Obito said. “What happens when we find the boy?”

 “Keep him secure,” Minato said. “Once he’s safe, I will have the military police likewise secure the orphanage and then Nonou will tell us everything she knows about Danzo.”

 “Are we sure this isn’t a trap?” Obito asked. “That she’s not leading us on for Danzo?”

 “I know a worried parent when I see one,” Minato said. “She compromised herself in coming to me. I could have her jailed for some of those missions that Danzo gave her that were not properly authorized.”

 “All right. We’ll go to Hiashi,” Obito said, taking the alleged photos of Kabuto.

 “Good luck,” Minato said. “And find that boy.”

.o.o.o.

 “Doctored,” Hiashi said without even activating his Byakugan.

 “You know that easily?” Obito asked, wide-eyed.

 “I specialized in this in the latter years of the war,” Hiashi said, flipping between the photos again. “So yes. The alterations become more severe as the boy appears to age. Clearly this started by swapping his face for a similar child’s and then began moving farther and farther from what he really looks like.”

 “People’s faces can change a lot when they grow up, though…” Obito said.

 “True, but the alterations make me quite certain that the situation you describe is not what is happening here,” Hiashi said. “As you can see, in the early photos his hair is similar to Hatake’s. However it grows ever so slightly more blonde over time. Were this series to go on for another four years or so it would be pale yellow, almost. While hair color does sometimes subtly shift with age, it normally does not gain pigmentation. In addition, the eye shape also subtly shifts. At the beginning the boy clearly has rounder eyes similar to your teammate Nohara, but they have in the images become more angular like your own in an unnatural manner. Add in the shadows and light sources on certain body parts not quite lining up as they should and these photographs have been doctored as to deceive someone as to this boy’s true appearance.”

 “Wow. You really were an expert,” Kakashi said.

 “Indeed,” Hiashi said. “The question is, why did you think these photographs were doctored to begin with, and why did you invoke the Hokage in getting me to look at them?”

 “With any luck, you’ll know soon,” Kakashi said, taking the photos back. “For now, that’s pretty classified. Tell no one we were even here with photos, much less that you saw them. Officially this was a sealwork inquiry.”

 Hiashi frowned, “Very well. When this comes to light I expect a full explanation from either you or the Hokage.”

 “I think you’ll probably get one,” Obito said.

.o.o.o.

 “All right, we have our lead, now we need a team,” Kakashi said once they were back at their apartment. “I want at least one more tracker. Should probably include another Uchiha, to give them a hand in brining Danzo down. Someone we can trust not to fly off the handle on the subject.”

 “…We’ll take Itachi and Hana,” Obito decided.

 “What?” Kakashi asked, looking over sharply. “That’s a chunin and a genin, Obito.”

 “Yeah. So it looks like a normal squad on a mission, you as the jonin captain with another jonin, a chunin, and a genin working with you,” Obito said. “So we have a cover of it being a lower rank via their inclusion. Besides, we don’t expect much combat and Hana is a trained medic.”

 “Of all the times for Rin to be out of the village,” Kakashi complained. “Fine, but if Tsume tries to kill us I get to blame you.”

 “Deal,” Obito said, holding out a hand so they could shake on it. “So, where do we start?”

 “Probably the old labs, the ones that were found after Orochimaru was caught in the act,” Kakashi said. “We’ll take the shirt and see if we can track Kabuto from any of them. Go from there.”

 “…What happens if we find Root?” Obito asked.

 “If it gets dicey, I have a seal that instantly transports Pakkun to Sensei’s desk,” Kakashi said. “We’ll use that to relay our location and get reinforcements. If it gets really dicey, you secure Hana and Itachi’s escape while I use the Sanbi to keep Root busy. You can then back me up once they’re clear.”

 “Good of you to know I’d come back,” Obito said.

 “You’re not exactly easy to get rid of,” Kakashi said dryly.

.o.o.o.

 “How long do we expect this mission to be?” Hana asked as they entered the first lab and hers and Kakashi and Obito’s dogs fanned out.

 Obito scrunched his nose at the mildew and dust all around the place, “We’re not sure. That’s why we told you to pack as if leaving the village for a while. We really don’t know how long it will be and can’t risk people knowing we’re doing it so we can’t go home for breaks.”

 “This place is…disturbing,” Itachi said.

 “I’ll say,” Kakashi said, looking at the terminals the Third had smashed when he’d found his student’s twisted experiments. “Looks like after they swept it for evidence it was just left to rot.”

 “Well something’s been here to cause all this dust,” Hana said. At the guys’ looks she said, “Dust is mostly made up of dead skin cells and the excrement of dust mites, which feed on shed skin cells. While some do feed on mold, this dust seems more consistent with mammalian remains.”

 “Huh. Vet knowledge for the win,” Obito said. “Then again, who knows how many curious people snuck in here?”

 “I think I smell the kid,” Kakashi said, unsealing the shirt from a scroll to double check. “…Yeah. Smells like him.”

 “Not just him,” Pakkun said. “More people too. Recent.”

 “Mostly around the broken terminals,” Bull added.

 “Could someone have been trying to retrieve information off of them?” Itachi asked.

 “Entirely possible,” Obito said. “Awful as what Orochimaru did was, a lot of people wanted his results.”

 “Including Danzo,” Kakashi said. “As I remember it, he was perfectly supportive of Orochimaru’s experiments until it became public what lines were being crossed.”

 “Question is…is the kid still here?” Obito asked, folding his arms and tapping his foot. “How recent is recent, Bull?”

 “Within a month,” Bull admitted. “…Shirt-smell is a bit older than that.”

 “So he’s been in the village,” Itachi said.

 “Probably for a check-in,” Hana said. “Then he got sent out again?”

 “But to where?” Obito wondered.

 “We go farther in and see if that tells us,” Kakashi said. “Be on your guard. We don’t know who or what else is here.”

 Kakashi took point. The acid armor would hopefully let him handle any frontal assaults.

 “My dogs and I still smell a lot of different people…” Hana said. “How could this be going on beneath notice?”

 “The Third maybe trusted Danzo too much,” Obito said bitterly. “And Sensei’s had his mind on other things.”

 “Someone’s up ahead,” Kakashi said. “I’ll try and capture them silently. Itachi, prepare a genjutsu to make them talk.”

 “Yes sir,” Itachi said.

.o.o.o.

 They went through several operatives before finding one who knew anything at all about Kabuto. Itachi nearly exhausted his chakra stores casting and re-casting strong enough genjutsu to get their marks to cooperate.

 Hana meanwhile collected the masks Obito ripped off the ninja before sending them into Kamui to wait. All of them had a symbol for Root on them.

 “That’s very brazen of him,” she noted, putting the fifth and final mask in her bag. “If the organization was ordered to be disbanded years ago.”

 “Danzo’s gotten far too comfortable as the man in the shadows,” Obito agreed darkly as Kakashi and Itachi finished with the last ninja. “I’ll drop into the interrogation cells and drop off these five for Hokage-only clearance. Ibiki should honor that.”

 “Good, then catch up,” Kakashi said. “We’re heading to Iwa.”

 “Is that such a good idea?” Hana asked. “Itachi seems exhausted.”

 “We can’t stay here, these hidey-holes are enemy territory right now,” Obito said. “Kakashi, can you carry him?”

 “I don’t need to be carried,” Itachi protested. “I will be fine.”

 “Take a solider pill, at least,” Kakashi said. “Anyway. The plan is now to try and catch Kabuto before he gets too far into Stone territory. Seems he only left a few days ago—if we’re lucky, we’ll overtake him.”

 “How will we even know him?” Itachi asked. “The only image we have are faked.”

 “We have this real one,” Kakashi reminded him, holding up a picture of a five year old Kabuto that Nonou had given them. “And we have his scent. So even if we can’t trust our eyes, several of us can trust our noses.”

 “Got that right,” Pakkun said.

 “All right then, see you soon,” Obito said, teleporting away. He needed to clear those five Root agents out of Kamui, just in case he needed to send anyone else in there later. The Land of Stone was a risky bet, and didn’t exactly have the best memories. But it made sense why Danzo would think extra operatives were needed there, and why he’d send someone as under the radar as an orphan no one outside of a few people at an orphanage knew existed.

 Well, more people knew Kabuto existed now. Hopefully that would be what brought Danzo down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. Had to rewrite over half of this since my computer bricked a little over a week ago. Good news is didn't loose too much else from this story that wasn't already posted. Originally Shisui was involved too but he ended up being superfluous so I cut him in the rewrite. I also made Obito and Minato's discussion on the clan more concise. 
> 
> So we finally move onto the Danzo plot, through a fun angle--Nonou spilling everything if Minato's students get her Kabuto home safely (Kabuto's roughly 12 by this point).


	35. Root II: Retrieval

 There were only so many safe ways towards Iwa, and Kakashi used basic process of elimination to guess which on Kabuto would take. He kept them at a slower pace until it was time to choose in order to give Itachi time to recover and Obito time to show up. He’d sent Bisuke with the message to not wait up but he’d be a little late. Kakashi had rolled his eyes but they’d continued on.

 Rain was risky due to ongoing fallout from Hanzo’s assassination years ago. While the village itself was allegedly secure, the surrounding areas were much less safe for travel and a hotbed of missing ninja. Rain ninja rarely took missions out of their nation these past few years, tied up in domestic affairs. They’d instantly assume a trespasser was a new missing ninja and attack on sight. Kabuto being a spy for Root and therefore unlikely to carry anything officially tying him to Konoha would have no way of proving his alligence to anyone and would be killed. So any path through Rain was out.

 Grass was possible, it had always been a little on the weak side and its patrols tended to be shoddy. However it was growing season, so the typical cover for Grass, that of a wandering farmhand, would not work out as almost any farm would ask for labor and turning too many down would be suspicious. So it was likely that Grass was out. That left Waterfall.

 The quickest way through Waterfall to Stone Country was short and narrow. It was a moderately dense forest, continuing from those in the land of Fire, that tapered off into rocky grassland near the Waterfall-Stone border. There were numerous ways through the woods, and it would be hard to find Kabuto unless they overtook him and waited in the grasslands. They could catch him easily there. As long as they got to him before he hit the mountain ranges over a day’s travel into Stone they’d be fine, but even crossing the border was dangerous.

 “We’re not going to find him in these woods,” Hana said. “There’s too many ways through.”

 “Good observation but already accounted for,” Kakashi said. “We’re hurrying through the woods. The grasslands on the other side will be easier to catch him in.”

 “I’ve never journeyed this deep into Waterfall Country before,” Itachi said. “Shouldn’t there be more cliffs? For the falls?”

 “That’s north, a little more out of the forest,” Kakashi said. “The southern and western borders are flatter.”

 “Ah, I see,” Itachi said.

 Obito popped into existence on Kakashi’s right, “Ah, there we go. You all really got far for only two days.”

 “What took so long?” Kakashi asked.

 “Set some false trails. Making it look like we’re going through Grass,” Obito said. “Had to explain to Ibiki a few times who the guy I dropped off was. Think quite a few people are going to be very upset by the time we get back. Sensei had me report to Nonou too and she was not happy. Worked out what she thinks Danzo’s plan was.”

 “Oh really? What was it?” Kakashi asked.

 “He’d been pressuring her to get into Root to get Kabuto out,” Obito said. “She thinks he was going to release some other kid, the kid in the photos maybe. Then he’d have them both and she wouldn’t know her son. She might be used to kill him.”

 “What the hell?” Itachi asked. “Why would he even…why…what?”

 “Exactly!” Obito said. “Screwed up beyond belief, I know. The man is loose many screws, little chunin. Never cross him if you can help it. Oh, Itachi, Hana, here. For emergencies.”

 “What?” Hana asked as Obito tossed each of them a scroll.

 “I’ll let you know if it’s time to use them,” Obito said.

 “I don’t know much about seals,” Hana said.

 “Just touch it with some blood and it’ll activate. Nice and simple,” Obito promised.

.o.o.o.

 Resting was hard. They had to leave someone awake to keep watch, which meant adding time so that everyone got enough sleep.

 It took two more days to reach the grasslands. They let the dogs fan out as soon as they did, Kakashi racing off one way with Itachi and Obito the other with Hana to cover more ground.

 “What do we even say if we find him?” Hana asked. “He’ll think we’re enemy agents. Maybe a test from Danzo? Or that he should die rather than be questioned by those loyal to the Hokage…”

 “There’s not too much we can do. We have to hope he’ll trust us that his mother sent us, that we’re here for her sake and his, because Kakashi and I are who we are which makes it clear we work for the Hokage,” Obito said. “That’s why Itachi is with Kakashi. He does sincere a lot better than our dear masked friend ever could.”

 “You’re Kakashi’s boyfriend and you say that?” Hana asked.

 “Just because I love him doesn’t mean I’ll say he’s something he’s not,” Obito said. “And convincingly sincere? Very much a not. Wait until it's time to use brutal honestly before we let him have a go.”

 “You think between the two of us we have enough sincerity?” Hana asked.

 “The Inuzuka aren’t known for their falsehoods,” Obito said. “And well, I’m known as a crybaby bleeding-heart with no poker face to save my hide so we should be okay, right?”

 Hana chuckled, “Right, I…they found something.”

 Here triplet canines rushed up to her, Bull and Bisuke behind them.

 “That way!” Bisuke yapped loudly. “Move it, move it-”

 “Get Kakashi and Itachi,” Obito told Urushi as the scrappy dog came running to the commotion. “All right, everyone else, let’s go!”

 The ground turned muddy as they ran on, possibly from recent spring rains. Obito, Hana, and the dogs kept their footing, though, and Obito eventually spotted someone trying to hide in the distance.

 “Bull, anyone else around?” Obito asked.

 “Not that I can hear,” Bull said. Since he had the best hearing after Akino, Obito took that as a go ahead.

 He called, “Kabuto! Your mother wants a word with you!”

 The poor guy actually fell out of the bushes he was hiding in at that. Was Obito good or was he good?

 “Who just yells that?” Hana demanded.

 “Me!” Obito said cheerfully as he managed to close in and seize Kabtuo by the collar. “Konoha’s number one surprising ninja!”

 Hana rolled her eyes, “You surprised a _twelve-year-old_.”

 “A Root twelve-year-old!” Obito corrected. “Hi, there Kabuto! We’re here to drag you home!”

 Hana gaped at him. Kabuto managed to look equally shocked but kept his mouth shut.

 “How are you a jonin?” Hana asked, sounding horrified.

 “Um, pretty sure Kamui did most of the work,” Obito admitted. “Now then, Kabuto. Your mom is turning on Danzo and we’re here to rescue you so she can do so freely, okay? This is not a drill, a test, or Danzo tricking you in any way because I see the little wheels in your head turning to say it is. It is not.”

 Kabuto eyed him warily.

 “So what kind of agent are you anyway? Clearly not much of a sneaker yet…you one of those ‘easily blends into the crowd’ types?” Obito asked. “I think you are. Probably just act totally below suspicion, but you don’t know what to do when cornered. Of course you don’t. You’re twelve. It’s okay, I’m twenty and I don’t know it either some days.”

 Kabuto glanced at Hana, as if asking her for assistance. When she shrugged she looked back at Obito, “Are you trying to put me at ease or make me more nervous with the yammering?”

 “He speaks,” Obito said as Kakashi and Itachi and the rest of the dogs showed up. “Hey guys, found him. He’s only so good at the sneaky-sneaky, must have been some other kind of spy.”

 “Obito, stop weirding out the children,” Kakashi said. “Yakushi Kabuto. Your mother hired us to retrieve you, with the payment of informing us as to Danzo’s illicit activities if we did so. Any contributions you can make, intelligence wise, will likely be rewarded.”

 Kabuto stared, “She…she got the _Hokage’s students_ sent after me?”

 “Sensei thought sending us might make it obvious we weren’t double agents or something,” Kakashi said. “Or working for Danzo.”

 “I…I don’t understand,” Kabuto said. “Why did I need to be retrieved?”

 “Did you think working for Danzo was the end of it?” Obito asked. “That you’d take her place and that was it?”

 Kabuto’s shoulders tightened. Kakashi and Obito shared a glance. The answer was clear: he had. Itachi sighed and Hana’s eyes flicked away. Apparently they’d gotten the message too.

 “He’s been using you to blackmail your mother ever since,” Kakashi said. “Threatening to send you on suicide missions if she doesn’t cooperate. Instead of getting one agent he got two, Nonou just gets to stay part time until he’s done with her.”

 He gestured for Obito to pitch camp with the others. Obito frowned, but nodded. If Kakashi thought he could get through to Kabuto, well, he could have at it. Besides, setting up a good, defensible camp was important this close to the border, and there was no way they’d make it into safer territory before nightfall. 

.o.o.o.

 “You’re going to talk to me alone, then?” Kabuto asked Kakashi.

 Kakashi nodded. “Thought the privacy might help.”

 Also he wasn’t sure Hana and Itachi were ready to ehar the sorts of things he needed to say right now.

 “Say…say I go along with this,” Kabuto said. “Then I’m branded a traitor working for a man you say is working against the village.”

 “You’re not a traitor,” Kakashi said. “You’re a little boy who got in over his head.”

 “I’m not in over my head! I do well on my missions,” Kabuto said.

 “I understand,” Kakashi said.

 “Oh do you?” Kabuto asked.

 “I understand,” Kakashi repeated. “I was a chunin by the time I was six, you see. I’m considered the greatest prodigy of my generation, like Itachi is for his. But unlike Itachi, I spent a lot of my childhood in a war, fighting. Like you.”

 “I haven’t been fighting a war,” Kabuto said.

 “Haven’t you?” Kakashi asked. “What do you think Danzo’s had you doing? Errands? You’ve been fighting the kind of wars people don’t think about, and the worst part is they’re also wars that were unnecessary. You’ve spent more than half your life at this point, all for a woman whose face I’ll bet has gotten a bit fuzzy in your memories by now.”

 “It’s not just for her, it’s for the others,” Kabuto said. “It’s for everyone.”

 “Everyone at the orphanage? I think they’d rather have their brother around, instead of wondering where in the world he’s gotten to,” Kakashi said. “You don’t need to be a sacrifice for this.”

 “I’m not a sacrifice, I’m just…I’m just letting Root use me,” Kabuto said.

 “You’re not a tool to be used,” Kakashi said. “You’re a warrior, if a bit rusty in anything outside of your skillset. You’re too smart to be a tool. And so Danzo decided you would never go home.”

 “Explain,” Kabuto said.

 “Your mother demanded photographs,” Kakashi said. “To know you were still alive. They gave her these.”

 He pulled the doctored photos from his vest and passed them to the boy.

 Kabuto stared at the pictures in horror, at the face that wasn’t his, “What? No…no…why are they like this? What are you saying?”

 “…I’m saying your mother doesn’t even know what her little boy looks like anymore,” Kakashi said. “I’m saying she and we think Danzo intended to kill her all along and for whatever reason was going to have you do it by tricking her into thinking you were an enemy operative and her boy was safe somewhere else. You only bought her time, Kabuto, unless you come with us and let her buy her freedom.”

 Kabuto swallowed shakily. “I’ll go with you.”

 “Good,” Kakashi said, steering him over to the camp. Obito had used an earth technique to make some rocks for cover and concealment, and Itachi had a fire going. “He’s in.”

 “All right,” Obito said. “Tomorrow, we head home.”

 “Get some rest,” Kakashi said. “I’ll take first watch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally Root was going to be in three parts but the middle got so long I split it in half. So "Depths" has become "Retrieval" and "Danzo" before we get to the final part. 
> 
> Kabuto's still a year or two away from when he'd have killed his mother in Iwa. He's not-quite chunin level in everything other than intel and medicine and is twelve years old. But his skills at melting into a crowd and being unassuming make him a good agent in urban areas, like Hidden Villages. On the other hand...not so good at hiding in a wilderness.
> 
> As Obito and Kakashi noted, sending them is an easy way of getting Kabuto's trust from the get-go. Obviously the Hokage's students are working for the Hokage. Danzo has probably told Root agents to avoid them due to their loyalty to Minato. 
> 
> Hana is so confused by these crazy jonin she's working for.


	36. Root III: Danzo

 Itachi woke up to Kakashi barking a warning.

 He threw himself sideways on instinct, but Kabuto was sleeping on that side and they collided. Hana managed to get to her feet first, and her dogs were already circling the three of them protectively.

 Kakashi and Obito had already engaged and killed the three men who’d attacked them.

 “Root agents,” Kabuto said as he double-checked his weapons.

 “Danzo wants you dead, as I said,” Kakashi said.

 “…This was a setup,” Kabuto said suddenly. “Of course! He made my other worry so she’d go for the Hokage, the Hokage would send you to keep it quiet-”

 “What, he thinks he can take us with a few goons?” Obito scoffed.

 “Bed, there’s a lot more than just those three here,” Pakkun warned.

 “With the information you gave the Hokage, Danzo would be getting desperate,” Kakashi told Obito.

 “Desperate enough to throw what he’s got left at us?” Obito asked.

 Kakashi sniffed before snarling, “Desperate enough to come in person.”

 “What?” Hana asked, Obito’s expression indicating that he’d been about to do the same and has merely been beaten to it.

 “That’s possibly suicide,” Itachi noted.

 Kaburo snorted, “You said it yourselves. You’re trying to bring down Root entirely, which implicates Danzo for possibly treasonous acts. You backed him into this cor-”

 An assassin would have stabbed clean trhough Kabuto if he hadn’t suddenly popped out of existence. Hana, her dogs, and Kakashi’s dogs all jumped the assassin as Obito pulled Kabuto out of Kamui a little closer to Itachi.

 “Maybe just put all the kids in there?” Kakashi asked.

 “I think we need the backup for now,” Obito hedged.

 Kakashi whipped on his heel and aimed a lighting technique. What looked like empty air shimmered and Itachi realized it was a powerful genjutsu. He faintly smelled something burning, and if he could notice it, then Kakashi or Hana could easily zero in on it.

 “I’ve got him,” Kakashi said, moving.

 “Keep Kabuto safe,” Obito ordered as Kakashi engaged the shimmer in the air that Itachi supposed was Danzo. “Kabuto, you’re on medic duty.”

 “Right,” Kabuto said.

 They didn’t have time for more planning than that as they were pounced from all sides. Obito and Itachi quickly backed their opponents up with fire techniques while Hana and the dogs tried to isolate and take down any injured. Kabuto stayed close to Itachi’s back, occasionally yelling warnings as he saw something in someone’s blind spot.

 Itachi was knocked to the ground as two agents rushed him. Hana’s dogs quickly stalled one, letting Itachi get away with little more than a stabbed hand that Kabuto grabbed.

 “It’s barely bleeding, heal someone who needs it!” Itachi complained.

 “I’m neutralizing poison, idiot,” Kabuto snapped.

 “…Oh,” Itachi said, kicking himself. “Sorry. Heat of the-”

 “Down!” Kabuto yelped and they both ducked a water technique that Obito countered with fire quickly. “And it’s fine.”

 “There’s too many,” Hana huffed, falling back towards the group. “They’re onto me and the dogs now.”

 “Okay, new plan?” Itachi asked, trying to use a genjutsu to confuse their opponents about their exact positioning.

 The three of them turned at an odd hissing noise. Itachi was surpised to see odd chakra forming around Kakashi as Danzo knocked him down. Kakashi rolled to avoid another blow.

 “Itachi!” Obito called. “NOW!”

  Itachi spun in a tight turn to duck around another agent, who Hana kicked to the dogs to tear into. As his knee hit the ground he opened the scroll and slammed his bloodied hand into it.

 The was a bright yellow flash.

 The Root agents froze. Danzo was clearly better trained than his proteges and continued to fight Kakashi, but he obviously hadn’t missed the appearance of Minato Namikaze on the field.

 “…I summoned the Hokage,” Itachi said, shock almost overriding sense too much for him to dodge the next blow. He barely got around it, but Minato dispatched the opponent to make up for Itachi’s sluggishness.

 “Seal Master, remember?” Minato asked. “I made that scroll like a supercharged version of my kunai. Now then! Hana, Itachi, get Kabuto to safety! Kakashi, win your fight! Obito, back me up with the rest!”

 “The rest?” Hana asked before Itachi grabbed her and Kabuto to pull them towards the edges of the fray. “What does he mean the rest?”

 “He means he’s the freaking Yellow Flash,” Itachi said. “Flee on sight or be killed.”

 There were several more flashes behind them, peppered with Obito and Minato sometimes calling out brief warnings or suggestions. No one pursued the trio of humans and trio of dogs back into the trees, so Itachi assumed his uncle and the Hokage were winning. That just left his other uncle and Danzo…

 “Is that the…thing?” Hana asked when they finally had enough distance between them and the fray to turn around. “The thing that’s up with Kakashi?”

 Itachi nodded as the green-blue chakra formed a shroud around Kakashi, its erratic lashing about reminding him of little Gaara’s sand, “I think so.”

 “It’s incredible looking…what is it?” Hana asked as they began to form a defensive formation.

 “I know it’s acidic chakra,” Itachi said.

 “Acidic chakra? Fascinating,” Kabuto said. “…How does it not hurt him?”

 “I really don’t know,” Itachi admitted.

 “Wow, Obito and the Hokage went to work,” Hana murmured, looking at the pileup of dead Root agents.

 “That’s why he’s the Hokage,” Itachi said.

.o.o.o.

 Danzo was good, Kakashi would give him that. He was also one hell of a genjutsu user. Kakashi kept having to waste time breaking the illusions just to fight properly, and sometimes the acid armor was the only thing stopping him from taking a serious hit.

  **This is ridiculous**.

 Oh, not _now_. Kakashi tried to ignore the Sanbi as he continued to fight. His best bet was to win with stamina. The tailed beast gave him a monstrous supply compared to most, and Danzo was old. If he could just outlast enough attacks…

  **Again, ridiculous. If you’d just let me** -

 No!

 Kakashi had control. He would do this and do it his way.

  **Feh, humans. Try to help and see what you get**.

 “Shut up,” Kakashi hissed as he rolled with a blow and used the momentum to propel Danzo sideways into a stumble that left him a perfect target. “I can do this.”

  **Do it _slowly_. Finishing him quickly is more satisfying and takes less out of you**.

 Well if the Sanbi had any _suggestions_ outside of taking control, it could _feel_ _free_ to give them! Kakashi swore as Danzo used another illusion to throw off the lightning blade just enough to escape and pursued him further away from the group.

  **Brat. He’s obviously trying to isolate you and you’re falling for it. Kill him before he draws you too far away**.

 “And how do I do that?” Kakashi hissed.

  **You’ve got one of those fancy eyes, don’t you? It’s supposed to be genjutsu proof or something? Have a ‘super genjutsu’ as your Uchiha put it?**

 If Kakashi had Tsukuyomi he had no idea how to activate it or what to do once it was active.

  **Memory serves, your boyfriend used the black flames when he got pissy, right? Get mad. I’ll even just sit back and not take advantage**.

 “Why should I trust you?” Kakashi asked as he managed to tackle Danzo to the ground. They slid through the mud, and Kakashi lost his grip. Danzo slipped as he tried to stand and Kakashi grabbed his ankle to hold him there.

  **This guy’d be a threat to my sibling in the Hokage’s brat. So get the damn job done!**

 The Sanbi…the Sanbi was _worried_ about the Kyuubi. It was willing to help Kakashi out if it meant Danzo wouldn’t be around to make trouble for Naruto or the Kyuubi.

 “Deal,” Kakashi said and stopped bothering to stay calm. He lunged, bringing Danzo down fully into the mud with him. He wrestled his way on top of the old man and made sur etheir eyes locked and-

 That was a Sharingan.

 Fucker had been hiding a Sharingan.

 Kakashi felt the roar of anger in his ears before everything fell quiet.

 This was…this was new. What was this? Tsukuyomi?

 Yes, Tsukuyomi.

 The world had turned the colors of film negatives, but it felt like some of the stronger genjutsu Kakashi had learned in that…he was in control…this was his. All this. He could do something here. He chuckled at Danzo, who looked around in shock.

 Kakashi smirked. Something large loomed behind Danzo…something with three thrashing tails…

 “Shimura…you are _in trouble_.”

.o.o.o.

 “Where’s Kakashi?” Obito asked, looking around.

 “He and Danzo went that way,” Minato said. “Go back him up. We’re done with this lot. I’ll round up the kids.”

 “Right!” Obito said, taking off running. Pakkun and Bull joined him, not that he needed help finding Kakashi. The tracks through the mud were easy to follow.

 He stumbled on Kakashi just…sitting there with Danzo’s corpse and panting.

 “Kashi? You okay?”

 “Yeah I…yeah,” Kakashi said. “Think…think maybe the Sanbi and I need to have a longer chat later but…yeah…”

 “The Sanbi?” Obito asked. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

 “Well,” Kakashi leaned back far enough to look at Obito, who was still behind him. “He kind of gave me a tip that helped me figure out Tsukuyomi.”

 “No shit?” Obito asked.

 “No shit,” Kakashi agreed. “Might want to seal up that corpse or toss it in Kamui. Because I’m probably going to pass out from mental stress from the first time using that genjutsu and I don’t like your odds of carrying that and me.”

 “Duly noted,” Obito said, sending Danzo’s corpse into the other dimension. If sensei wanted it in a sealing scroll he’d just call it back. “What do you think the cover story’ll be?”

 “Um…Kabuto and Nonou heroically uncovered Danzo planning to start a war with Root attacking Iwa and we awesomely headed them off before they could hit any targets within Stone County? Or something?” Kakashi offered, waving a hand lackadaisically. “Should work great. Might even improve relations.”

 “Please, the Tsuchikage is paranoid as hell,” Obito scoffed. “…For good reason, since we had guys like Danzo on our side. Technically. Wonder what else he got up to…”

 “Hopefully Nonou and Kabuto know, because I’m not sure how much of Root’s even left alive at this point,” Kakashi said. “I-ah-ah…”

 Obito smiled as his boyfriend yawned. “Take it easy, Kakashi. I’ll take it from here.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Danzo really ended up in a corner here. His only hope was to try and take out Kabuto quietly before he was found and messily if he was not (probably planned to blame the Sanbi somehow). But Minato saw it coming and gave Obito the trump card that Obito passed out last chapter. 
> 
> We also get a little more of who Isobu is as a character and Kakashi figures out Tsukuyomi, which will be addressed more later on. But this is their first big time working together on something. 
> 
> Next time, we wrap up this arc!


	37. Root IV: Home

 Obito was never so happy to not really understand domestic village politics beyond a basic grasp as he was when the Danzo fallout occurred. It meant that beyond people trying to pry Sensei’s opinions out of him, no one really asked him about since it was well known he didn’t know and the same was true for Kakashi. Rin knew more about politics than either of them, but no one was dumb enough to piss off a strong medic, much less a strong medic with a girlfriend who loved knives and throwing snakes at people.

 Obito had to admit, Anko had her uses.

 Of course, that didn’t mean they were off the hook entirely. The clan heads were busy as hell with the fallout, and since Itachi and Hana were rattled by the mission Fugaku and Tsume had made the executive decision that their children’s wellbeing, mental and physical, was Obito and Kakashi’s problem.

 Which also meant Kabuto since Hana and Itachi had pretty much adopted him into their three-man team. Nonou had been rather…threatening about how they were to handle her kid (to say nothing of Kabuto’s older siblings in the orphanage trying to back her up, though some of those had been more cute than scary). He was still a little fragile and in therapy. Minato-sensei had taken pity on them and let them use his house and his yard and his son to keep Kiba and Sasuke occupied since somehow the little brothers came as a package deal with the older siblings.

 Kabuto was a quiet kid, but not in the serene-way Itachi had been a quiet kid. More the barely-contained-bundle-of-nerves way. Obito was careful not to make sudden moves or loud noises around him.

 Kabuto leaped to his feet at the return of loud barking and Obito sighed. Just because he and Kakashi were holding to that plan didn’t mean anyone else was.

 Naruto, Sasuke, and Kiba ran around the corner and across the porch, followed by the Haimaru triplets and Hana, who’d been after them for well over a minute now.

 “Kiba, you give me back my hair tie!” Hana yelled, hair flying. Obito could see why she kept it back. It wasn’t as thick as her mother’s and whipped all around, partly blinding her. He guessed that was why she couldn’t catch the kids—impaired vision.

 Itachi sighed and used Body Flicker to get over to the kids. He managed to grab Kiba and Sasuke, but Kiba had already handed the tie off to Naruto and Naruto raced inside with it.

 “He’ll try to hide in the shower first,” Kakashi told Hana, who growled and stomped inside. “…Kabuto, why don’t you help her head him off?”

“All right,” Kabuto said, following Hana inside.                                                                               

 “If he’s not in the shower check the washer and the dryer!”  Obito called after him. “Then the vents!”

 “Where hasn’t Naruto hid in this house?” Itachi grumbled as he wrestled Sasuke and Kiba down.

 “Um…I don’t think we’ve caught him in the fridge yet, but I don’t think he’d fit,” Obito mused. “Like, maybe if he was still three he could but not now…”

 “Or he’s been in there and we’ve just never caught him,” Kakashi offered lightly.

 “Oh wow, you’re right,” Obito said. They winced as the barking briefly intensified before Naruto shrieked in terror and Hana yelled, “Gotcha!”

 “Huh. Six minutes from them getting the hair tie. That’s a record for her,” Kakashi said approvingly. “…Now she needs to try it when he’s got the whole village to run through.”

 “Yeah, you and his dad are the only ones who’ve caught him in less than half an hour when that happens,” Obito muttered. He could maybe do better thanks to Kamui, but he wasn’t as good a tracker as Kakashi or Minato, so it took him longer. Though he was nearing the half hour mark these days…

 Hana marched out of the house, Kabuto on her heels carrying a squirming Naruto. Hana’s three dogs all rushed over to the water bowls for a well-earned drink before flopping down to rest. Kabuto set Naruto down next to Itachi, and Naruto instantly jumped on the poor prodigy to make him let go of Kiba and Sasuke.

 “Sorry!” Kabuto said, re-wrangling Kiba and Naruto as Itachi pounced to stop his hyper little brother from running off. “Whew.”

 “I think we gave them a little too big of a dessert,” Kakashi sighed, putting a hand to his forehead. “When does the sugar wear off?”

 “Not soon enough,” Hana huffed as she managed to force her hair back into a mostly-neat ponytail.

 “Well how much did you give them?”

 “Oh thank everything!” Obito said as Rin walked onto the property. “Rin, save us!”

 “I’m just here to let you know that since Nonou’s testifying well into the night, the police force are going to be staying at the orphanage longer and Mikoto said Sasuke and Itachi will have to spend the night here,” Rin said.

 “Oh. Just bad news then. Gee, thanks,” Obito groaned. “…Save us anyway?”

 “I can maybe talk Anko into helping you but I’ll need to get back to the hospital in an hour,” Rin said. “…Actually maybe I should bring Anko over. We’re trying to undo some of those seals and you might be necessary for that. We can’t leave Kakashi to guard Kabuto and babysit the rest alone.”

 “I would have to take revenge for that,” Kakashi agreed quickly. “Lots and lots of it. Please do not make me do that.”

 “Right, right, children scare you, we know,” Obito said.

 “Don’t tell them that,” Kakashi complained, folding his arms. Kabuto and Itachi both shared amused looks as Naruto, Kiba, and Sasuke burst out laughing.

 “Oops. Still love me?” Obito asked.

 “So far. Don’t push your luck,” Kakashi warned.

 Naruto grinned, “’Bito and ‘Kashi, sitting in a tree. K-i-s-s-i-n-g!”

 “Oh we’ve done a lot more than kiss in trees, let me assure you,” Kakashi said.

 “Kakashi! You can’t tell children that!” Rin yelped as Obito went beet red in the face.

 “What? We’ve tracked people in trees, tied people up in trees, killed people in trees…” Kakashi said innocently.

 “You…you…” Rin growled.

 “Let you walk right into that one?” Kakashi offered smugly.

 “Obito, we’re leaving Kakashi here alone with the brats,” Rin said.

 “Obito, your ass stays put if you don’t want to end up locked out of the apartment,” Kakashi countered.

 “Uh…” Obito said, looking worriedly between his teammates.

.o.o.o.

 “The Hokage’s students are very…unorthodox,” Kabuto noted quietly.

 “Yeah, they’re nuts,” Itachi agreed. “I think it’s normal for their generation of jonin. You should meet Might Gai sometime.”

 “Itachi!” Hana said. “We are not subjecting Kabuto to… _that_ while he’s still in therapy!”

 “Why, what’s wrong with Gai?” Kabuto asked.

 “He makes _them_ look total mundane,” Itachi said, nodding at the jonin trio.

 Kabuto watched as Rin tried to wrestle Kakashi to the ground only for them to end up in a body flicker/substitution chase around the yard while Obito sat with his head between his hands, acting like he couldn’t hear or see any of it. “…That doesn’t sound possible but, sure, I’ll go with it.”

 “Hey, looks like the little brother brigade knocked out at least,” Hana said, smiling as he pointed at the pile Kiba, Naruto, and Sasuke had formed under a tree. “Good things come to those who wait, I guess.”

 “Good,” Itachi sighed, pulling a book out of his bag. “We can finally relax, then.”

 Kabuto didn’t think he’d be able to relax. His whole world had gotten the rug yanked out from under it and instead of staying with the people he at least somewhat knew, with his mother and the orphanage, he had to stay with some lunatic jonin and children and…okay, Itachi and Hana were actually very nice and did a good job of giving him his space, so that was good.

 “So, know what you’ll be doing once they shift you over to normal shinobi corps?” Hana asked.

 “Not really. I’m not very used to working in teams and we have no idea where they’ll put me,” Kabuto said. “Or even what rank I am.”

 “I think you’re a chunin,” Itachi said. “You’re specialized enough if medicine, espionage, intelligence, and in my opinion taijutsu to qualify.”

 “Hana’s a genin and she can kick my ass,” Kabuto said.

 “I’m from a clan that specializes in taijutsu, though,” Hana said. “Plus, you heal yourself from my dogs piling on fast. That’s pretty advanced. I’m nowhere near healing things that quickly or easily.”

 “It’s a talent,” Kabuto said, shrugging.

 “A good one,” Hana said. “Oh, hey! You should tlak to Rin, she’s an amazing medic! Maybe she has ideas! Hey, Rin! Rin!”

 Rin and Kakashi paused their argument. Obito looked very relieved. Rin walked over, “Is something wrong?”

 “I was wondering if maybe you could evaluate Kabuto’s medical skills,” Hana said. “They’re pretty darn good and I think he could become a chunin, easy.”

 “Well he’d need a bit more team experience before _I’d_ give him chunin rank,” Rin said, eying him critically. “But medical talent is still a good thing. You have decent self-healing skills, I’ll assume?”

 “Yes, I didn’t really have much support on missions,” Kabuto said. “Had to do all of my own medical.”

 “Pretyt impressive, for your age,” Rin said. “Sprains?”

 “Pretty easy,” Kabuto said. “It’s a little trick when it’s one of my wrists since then I’m fixing it one-handed but other than that, easy.”

 “I see,” Rin said. “Broken bones?”

 “Stabilizing is easy, I can’t manage full repair yet but I can control the situation so I can keep using the limb if nessessary without ruining it,” Kabuto said. “Ribs, though, ribs are really easy. I’m good with ribs.”

 “I see,” Rin said. “How much were you self taught?”

 “I learned a lot from Nonou,” Kabuto admitted. “But that was before I left. So…mostly self-taught for the last…five years or so?”

 “I see,” Rin said. “Hmm. What are your research skills like?”

 “I’m self-taught, so probably pretty good if you think my skills are good as well,” Kabuto said.

 “Good answer,” Rin said. “Hmm…how do you feel about errands?”

 “What?” Kabuto asked.

 “Say yes,” Hana said.

 “To what?” Kabuto asked.

 “She’s trying to hire you,” Itachi said. “Assistant medics spend a lot of their time doing research and running errands for the senior medics.”

 “How do you know that?” Hana asked.

 “I considered medic as a career option,” Itachi said. “Mother and Obito dissuaded me since they felt I might be better at using my talents to prevent the injuries from occurring than healing them. Given my power, that was a very good point, and I do enjoy being a genjutsu expert a bit much to give it less focus in favor of medical skills. Father also rightly pointed out that my intense empathy might mean I am mentally unfit for it.”

 “Yeah, I could see you cracking in a few years,” Rin said. “Your mental compartmentalization needs work, even just in general.”

 “I’m working on it,” Itachi said.

 “So…was this a job offer?” Kabuto asked.

 “I’ll need to see you in action,” Rin said. “Let’s make a deal. You three come with Obito and me to the hospital, and we’ll let Kabuto have a crack at some lesser injuries where I can easily handle any complications he causes. That way Kakashi’s only got the tiny ones to watch.”

 “I can probably handle that,” Kakashi said, sounding relieved.

 “Sounds good?” Rin asked.

 Kabuto nodded, “Yes.” He needed to find his place in the fabric of Konoha now that he was home, and this seemed a sgood a chance as any.

.o.o.o.

 “You should be proud,” Rin said as she handed Nonou the file. “He’s very talented.”

 “I’ll be proud in person when he’s finally home,” Nonou sighed, opening it. “How much more testimony do they need?”

 “Sensei thinks another few days, and then just keep you on call if they find out more,” Rin said. “I’m sure Kabuto wants to go home too. The therapist thinks it will help him out.”

 “So you’ve given him a chunin rank?” Nonou asked.

 “Yes, we decided to make his unit with Hana and Itachi official,” Rin said. “We’ll have them work with Obito, Sensei thinks. Ease him into teaching while Kabuto learns teamwork and Kabuto and Hana adjust to the new ranks.”

 “That should be good for him. A stable team and a stable home life should help him re-adjust,” Nonou said. “The Hokage said I’ll be kept in the village indefinitely as the punishment for helping Danzou hide Root, but that he thinks my orphanage is one of the better ones and I’ll remain in charge.”

 “To be honest, so few places take older kids that you fill a much-needed niche,” Rin said. “It’s nice that a few of them stick around once they’ve gotten their own jobs so that the younger kids have supervision, too.”

 “It’s been a good model for me,” Nonou said. “And some who moved out have been willing to foster. It helps keep me from overcrowding.”

 “You could maybe approach one of the wealthier clans for renovation help,” Rin said. “I know the Uchiha have been trying to take a more active role in village philanthropy, and the Aburame and Amikichi have some programs as well.”

 “And the Uchiha may be well-disposed towards me for helping with Danzo’s downfall and death,” Nonou said knowingly.

 “Yes. That could get you some decent funding,” Rin said. “Plus, the order to stay in the village prevents you from being sent away from your kids, so I think that works out.”

 “It does,” Nonou said. “I’m surprised you let him deal with some of these cases.”

 “I supervised. Kabuto is a quick study and good at coming up with solutions to confusing situations,” Rin said. “Medically. Socially he needs work, but that can be blamed on being in Root from such a young age. I’m sure he will improve in time.”

.o.o.o.

 “So, this is my room,” Kabuto said. “Mother felt I might be better on my own for now, but it’s close to hers and several others so I’m not really isolated.”

 “I know how important that is,” Itachi said. His home was busy as the head family’s home, and having his own room was very important no matter how much he loved Sasuke’s company. “Sometimes you just need a shut door.”

 “I like the desk area,” Hana said. “It’s amazing you fit all this in such a small space.”

 “I’m not used to having too many belongings,” Kabuto admitted. “Even with Mother and my siblings giving me a lot, it’s still been manageable.”

 “That’s good,” Hana said. “I guess it’s hard learning to stay in one place for so long.”

 “It’s…different,” Kabuto admitted. “Mother’s helped. You two have too.”

 “Glad to hear it,” Itachi said. “What’s the file cabinet for?”

 “Research,” Kabuto said. “I like learning and testing medical techniques and keeping records is important for that. Medical ninjutsu has a lot of potential but in some ways only the masters manage exceptional things in the field. I want to become a master and share my discoveries so any medic can use the information. For that, you need a lot of documentation.”

 “That’s a good goal,” Itachi said.

 “Yes. There are so many interesting things being done in the areas of sharing research,” Kabuto said. “Rin thinks I’m very good at consolidating data into understandable forms, which is nice.”

 “If you can make medic articles easier to digest, then I think I love you,” Hana said firmly. “I swear some people overload them with unnecessary jargon on purpose…”

 “Some do,” Kabuto said. “I think it makes them feel smarter, or it’s their way of proving they know what they’re talking about.”

 “Interesting,” Itachi said. “…So how long until Obito looks here?”

 “Probably another half hour, at least,” Kabuto said. “I don’t know if he’s ever stopped by the orphanage before, much less know the location of my room to teleport in.”

 “This is such strange teamwork training,” Hana said.

 “Not if you realize the point was Obito wanted us to got o Kabuto’s house,” Itachi said calmly.

 “What?” Hana asked.

 “Why do you think he’s gotten us missions cleaning your family’s kennels and picking up litter in the Uchiha compound?” Itachi asked. “Uncle Obito is big on teams getting along and know each other, always has been. This was just a ploy to get us to visit Kabuto’s house.”

 “Well, since we’re here…does your mother keep any good board games around?” Hana asked Kabuto.

 “Sure. I’ll show you,” Kabuto said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus closes the Root Arc! Next time: Isobu. 
> 
> So Kabuto has joined the supporting cast! He'll be coming back, as Itachi and Hana's friend, and will play a role in an upcoming chapter. Let's just say I didn't name drop Gai for nothing...but that would be telling. XD
> 
> I hope to over time show the shifts in Kabuto's personality this causes compared to his canon self. He's still going to have some things in common, like being an amazing medic with some powerful abilities and being a good actor...when he's older, but right now he's twelve so it's a little hard to show off what he's got in common with his 19-20 year old self from part 1. That's still seven years away (for those wondering, Hana is 11 and Itachi is 10).


	38. Isobu

 They stood in Kamui. It was safest to try this here, in case Kakashi made a mistake and his control slipped up.

 Kakashi had wanted Obito to leave. Obito had shut the idea down immediately, but Kakashi had glimpsed the ferocity behind the curt argument. Obito might have seemed very different from his clan in most ways, but he was an Uchiha when it came to keeping those close to him safe, wanting to protect them.

 “You ready?” Obito asked.

 “I don’t know, but we need to try,” Kakashi said. The Sanbi’s behavior was starting to get to him. The old turtle hadn’t given him much lip since Danzo died, which was odd. He’d felt its presence when he was around Naruto, same as ever, but no comments, no pushing, nothing.

 “Maybe he’s decided he likes you,” Obito said.

 “Yes, because I have such a charming personality,” Kakashi said. He and Sanbi had a relationship based in bickering and struggling for control. That didn’t change overnight.

 “Charmed me, didn’t it?” Obito asked, gently tugging Kakashi’s mask down. He kissed Kakashi firmly, dragging it out longer than necessary. Kakashi finally placed a hand on Obito’s chest to make him step back.

 “Wish me luck,” he said.

 “Good luck,” Obito said. He remained standing as Kakashi sat down, and the last image of him before Kakashi closed his eyes was an encouraging, if worried, smile.

 Kakashi focused his mediation on the seal, and the space that left for the Sanbi in his mind.

 It was, as always, a great sea. He didn’t have the patience to swim around and hope he didn’t paddle through the bars by accident.

 As soon as the cage was in sight, Kakashi focused and pushed his hands out.

 The water parted, forming walls to either side of the cage with a bare area in the middle. Kakashi dropped to the dry ground that had once been a seafloor.

 “ **That’s how I know you’re young. So dramatic** ,” the Sanbi muttered.

  “We need to talk,” Kakashi said.

 “ **Odd. You usually want me to shut up** ,” the Sanbi said.

 “You helped me,” Kakashi said. “With Danzo.”

 “ **Maybe I just thought the fancy eye trick would let me in on the fun. You think of that, little prodigy?** ” the Sanbi rumbled.

 “No, there was something else,” Kakashi said. “You saw him as a threat. Not to me, or to you, but to Naruto and through Naruto, the Kyuubi.”

 The Sanbi bristled at that. Kakashi remembered their meeting with Yashamaru, remembered the name Shukaku. “If you’d rather me use the Kyuubi’s name, I’d need to know what it is. Or your name, for that matter.”

 “ **…Kurama. My brother the fox is Kurama** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **Can I not be concerned for him?** ”

 “You didn’t want to fight him on that night, did you?” Kakashi asked. “You just wanted to be out in the open like he was.”

 “ **Rather than caged in a scrawny brat** ,” the Sanbi spat. “You never did fill out much, did you?”

 Kakashi shrugged. “I guess not. What do you think of the masked man?”

 “ **What**?” the Sanbi asked.

 “The masked man that I fought before you managed to seize on the stress of the situation and tried to get out. Did anything seem…familiar about him?”

 “ **Humans are all a bit similar looking if you ask me, including the masked ones** ,” the Sanbi said.

 Kakashi pursed his lips, “We have reason to believe that the Kyu—that _Kurama_ was not rampaging indiscriminately of his own will. Especially given your own obvious wish to just get me killed and get out of here.”

 “ **…If he was under his own power, he would have left as fast as he could** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **You would need to ask him**.”

 “He is sealed inside a child who wouldn’t know how to ask that sort of thing,” Kakashi said. “Maybe once Naruto is older and we can be surer, we’ll ask your brother. Right now I am asking you.”

 “ **So we’re at an impasse. Go away** ,” the Sanbi said.

 “You haven’t told me your name yet,” Kakashi said.

 “ **I haven’t told you a lot of things** ,” the Sanbi said.

 “…And I suppose there’s not much I can do to try and get you to,” Kakashi sighed.

 It was odd, standing in front of the cage like this. He’d feared it when he was younger, feared behind dragged inside and devoured, and the Sanbi breaking free after destroying him.

 Now it looked…almost sad.

 Kakashi stepped forward. The Sanbi eyed him warily. “ **What now, brat?** ”

 “I wonder if I could make it bigger,” Kakashi said.

 It looked almost comically cramped for something the Sanbi’s size, at any rate. And this place was flooded most of the time. Could he maybe…

 The cage expanded and Kakashi found himself quickly backing up to avoid ending up inside. Just because he was trying to make a peace offering didn’t mean he trusted the turtle for a minute.

 The Sanbi looked around. “ **A nicer cage? How sweet**.”

 “You don’t trust me and I don’t trust you,” Kakashi said. “I can’t let you out, but leaving you without room to move is wrong.”

 “ **And locking me up is right, little fish**?”

 Kakashi sighed before sensing something wrong. He looked up to see the Sanbi open its mouth and a torrent of water poured out.

 Shit! He’d been too focused on his ability to manipulate the mindscape and inadventely let the Sanbi do the same! The shock made the walls of water give way, and the sea was a sea once more.

 Kakashi was caught off guard. He tried to swim, but the clashing currents from the walls crashing into each other prevented it.

 Something seized him, wrapping his entire body in a tight grip. He was dragged closer to the bars when suddenly the waters parted again.

 The Sanbi rumbled in laugher, “ **Oh the expression on your face, mutt! Drowned dog is a look that suits you well**.”

 Kakashi was still outside the bars, but he was bound tightly in one of the Sanbi’s tails. The thick armored plates along it didn’t seem to stop it from constricting him easily.

 “ **But it would be all too _human_ to repay kindness with treachery, wouldn’t it?** ” the Sanbi asked. “ **I should set an example, after all, so the children will treat Shukaku and Kurama well**.”

 “Just proving a point then?” Kakashi asked.

 “ **You might hold the keys, little fish, but I hold the power** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **Your chakra is miniscule compared to mine and you know it. I’ve saved you from exhaustion time and again and _this_ is the first time you do something nice for me?** ”

  “You’ve fought me for control every one of those times except the last,” Kakashi said. “Don’t act like you give your power freely!”

 “ **Should I be expected to**?” the Sanbi demanded. “ **Sealed inside a miserable little-** ”

 “ _I never wanted you_!” Kakashi yelled. “ _I never wanted this_!”

 For some reason that made the turtle loosen its hold. Kakashi pried himself free the rest of the way and stood on the tail.

 “Neither of us wanted this, but it’s what we’ve got,” Kakashi said. “Naruto didn’t want Kurama and Gaara didn’t want Shukaku, but it’s what they have. Should we have to die because other people forced us into this?”

 “ **Your precious Hokage is the one who sealed Kurama away**!” the Sanbi snapped.

 “And what were we _supposed_ to do?” Kakashi demanded. “Let the masked man do whatever he wanted with your brother? Let your brother destroy a swath of Fire Country? And what was _I_ supposed to do? Just die so you could get out and kill everyone I care about?”

 “ **How long…** ” the Sanbi sighed. “ **How long has my brother been sealed?** ”

 “Kurama?” Kakashi asked. He tried to do the math in his head—it wasn’t quite as long as the village was old, no, it was only since Madara had used it against the First…then the fox had been in Lady Mito until Kushina, and then free for all of a night before Naruto. “Over a hundred years. Maybe approaching one-fifty.”

 “ **One night in over a hundred years** ,” the Sanbi sighed. “ **I’ve had much more**.”

 “I think almost all the rest of you have,” Kakashi said.

 “ **You ask what else you could do…and perhaps you are right** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **If you did not, someone else would. I’d be in some other brat, going through the same motions as always…you humans will never let us be.** ”

 “And what do you want to be?” Kakashi asked.

 “ **One does wonder** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **We’ve been this for so long…much of my mind is consumed in simply ‘not this’ that I never thought what ‘not this’ was.** ”

 “The way I see it, we’re stuck,” Kakashi said. “Together, you and I. So maybe…maybe your ‘not this’ can be…not being in a constant fight with your host. Maybe it can be us trying to get along.”

 “ **You’re never going to let me out** ,” the Sanbi huffed.

 “It would kill me,” Kakashi said flatly. “So, no.”

 “ **…If we ever found a way that would not kill you,** ” the Sanbi said slowly.

 “You’d be sealed in someone else within a year,” Kakashi noted. “Like you said, someone else would and will.”

 “ **Ah, now you’re arguing I should stick with the mutt I know, very clever,** ” the Sanbi said. 

 “We don’t have many options,” Kakashi said. “Get along or keep fighting, which do you want?”

 “ **Get along, he says** ,” the Sanbi chuckled. “ **As if it is so simple**.”

 “Why not?” Kakashi asked. “Why can’t this be simple after all the complicated shit we’ve had to deal with? Why not let it be simple?”

 Something about the Sanbi’s gaze got Kakashi’s attention. It reminded him of Sensei, oddly enough. “ **Your Uchiha has rubbed off on you**.”

 “What does Obito have to do with any of this?” Kakashi asked warily.

 “ **As if I haven’t been watching your little romance** ,” the Sanbi said. “ **He’s smarter than you, you know. Actually realized I have a _name_.** ”

 “Which is?” Kakashi asked.

 “ **…Are you going to use it?** ” the Sanbi asked. “ **Stop calling me ‘three tails’ and ‘Sanbi’ as if those are names?** ”

 “Yes. I’ll still call you a turtle if you’re being an asshole, though,” Kakashi said.

 “ **Hmph. Isobu. It’s Isobu** ,” Isobu said.

 “Then…let’s see if we can work on this, Isobu,” Kakashi said.

 Isobu laughed at him, “ **You have no idea what you’re even doing, do you**?”

 “Do you?” Kakashi challenged.

 “ **Fair, mutt…fair** ,” Isobu mused.

 “So I’m stuck using your name and you’re still going to call me a mutt?” Kakashi asked.

 “ **You’ll earn your name** ,” Isobu said. “ **Eventually.** ”

 Something in the way Isobu said that felt very final and Kakashi exhaled quickly as he came out of the meditation.

 “Kakashi?” Obito asked, wariness not quite completely concealed.

 “It’s me, Obito,” Kakashi assured him.

 “So…” Obito sighed as he slowly sank to sit in front of Kakashi. “Are you two like, friends now or something?”

 “Or something,” Kakashi said. “We’re not friends. We may never be, and if we will be it will take a long time. But…Isobu sees the sense in us working together. In not blaming me for Mist sealing him inside of me.”

 “Isobu, huh?” Obito said. “Well, thank Isobu for me.”

 “He can hear you himself,” Kakashi said. Isobu seemed satisfied with Obito’s reaction and Kakashi felt the turtle settle down in the back of his mind, content to merely wait and watch Kakashi’s actions, to see if Kakashi proved himself worthy of trusting.

 Kakashi sent Isobu a mental reminder that the turtle had to prove himself trustworthy as well. This was just a first step, they had a long way to go.

 But it was a good first step, and it made him hopeful that there would be more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi and Isobu have begun to build some trust. Kakashi is right that he never sealed Isobu inside himself and can't stop being a jailer without dying, but Isobu has a point as well, that Kakashi has never done much to prove himself willing to see Isobu as anything other than a mindless beast trying to escape and wreak havoc. And they both have a point that even if Kakashi could release Isobu, someone else would seal him in due time. 
> 
> We've come upon what the plot for the three main hosts in the series will be: trying to reach an accord with the bijuu they hold. Gaara and Naruto, like Kakashi, didn't exactly have a choice in their lot, which they can use to their advantage. Maybe. Kurama and Shukaku are bitchier than Isobu.


	39. Lee

 Obito did not expect to see Rin and Gai having a row in the Hokage’s office.

 To be fair he didn’t expect to see them having a row anywhere. Rin wasn’t really one to make a scene and Gai tended to get along with everyone. So a row between the two of them really wasn’t on his list of expected things at all.

 It had been a few months since the downfall of Root and really, Sensei’s office was not the place for fights. Especially without Sensei here! Honestly, and people called Obito the ridiculous one…

 “Um, hey guys.”

 Rin and Gai whipped around to look at him. Rin scowled, “Obito, don’t just Kamui places, it’s rude!”

 “I came in the door, Rin,” Obito said, getting an embarrassed laugh from her which at least made him grin a bit more. “What’s this about?”

 “Gai’s got a protégé,” Rin said.

 “Good for Gai, how is that a fight?” Obito asked, looking between them.

 “He’s an academy student,” Gai said, rubbing the back of his head. “Rock Lee.”

 “So? Some people take shines to the students. It happens,” Obito said. Heck, even Orochimaru had that kind of generous streak once, back when he’d been Anko’s sensei instead of seeing her as an experiment. Sensei had Kiraiya’s eye before graduation as well.

 “Lee is also…an orphan,” Gai said uneasily.

 “Oh,” Obito said, grin falling. “When?”

 “I don’t know. He doesn’t remember his parents and has been bouncing between foster homes for years,” Gai said. “He…cannot use ninjutsu or genjutsu. There is something off with his chakra.”

 “Oh!” Obito said. “Rin, were you looking into that?”

 “No, it’s already been looked into several times; I was trying to help Gai with some legal issues,” Rin said. “Normally, he’d just take Lee in himself, but he’s probably Lee’s only hope for a sensei and that complicates things.”

 “Anti-nepotism regulations form early in the First’s tenure,” Gai said. “That apparently there are _no loopholes in_.”

 To Obito’s shock, Gai actually gave Rin a very brief dirty look. What weird parallel world had he fallen into when he’d come through the door? Gai could give dirty looks for someone not finding loopholes? What? He needed to figure this out.

 “Okay, so let me see if I got this,” Obito said. “Gai can’t adopt the kid because he wants to be the kid’s sensei and that would be seen as nepotism even with an adopted kid, and Gai pretty much _has_ to be his teacher because he’s the only taijutsu expert in the Leaf—in the world if we’re being honest—who can give the kid enough training to make up for the handicap? Am I following?”

 “You have it exactly,” Gai said.

 “And…you both agree on this?” Obito asked.

 “Also true,” Rin said.

 “…I’m really sorry, guys, what’s the fight about again?” Obito asked.

 “I couldn’t find another foster family either,” Rin said. “Gai got just frustrated with me.”

 “And while Lee insists he can be self-sufficient he is only seven years old,” Gai said. “I remember during our academy days you and other young children trying the same often needed much support, and I do not feel Lee is adequately receiving it.”

 Obito nodded. Academy had been pretty rough, and he’d had the clan looking after his basic needs. The Kyuubi Attack had put a ton of extra weight on the foster system and they still didn’t have anywhere near enough host families…but then there was the other option…

 “Well, there’s always Nonou,” Obito said. “She kind of owes us.”

 “The woman who used to work for Danzo?” Rin asked, wide-eyed. “Are you sure?”

 “She runs a pretty good orphanage; there’s some other ninjas in training there,” Obito said. “Kabuto’s there too, Rin, come on, you know he’s fine at home since he’s pals with Itachi and Hana now. And I know how hard the kind of training Gai does is, so could be good for Lee to be around a good medic at home in case he goes overboard when unsupervised.”

 “And we are certain we can trust Nonou?” Gai asked, looking worried. “I admit; I know little of her connection to Danzo…”

 “She was a spy who wanted to retire, he decided she was too knowledgeable to let her live and cooked up some harebrained scheme to have her and one of her kids, Kabuto, not recognize and then kill each other. Real weird, evil shit,” Obito said. “She had to send Kabuto to therapy for a while about it. Itachi and Hana went with him. I think they bonded a bit during our mission.”

 “But the Hokage considers her trustworthy with children?” Gai asked.

 “Yes,” Obito said. “Gai, she could be our best bet. This Lee kid gets somewhere better to stay and eat and such and you can still be his sensei when the time comes.”

 “I would be very grateful if this could be worked out,” Gai said. “While I understand Lee’s wish for self-sufficieny and the youthful energy with which he pursues it… _seven_ is a little too youthful to be on one’s own. Kakashi was a chunin and he wasn’t allowed to live alone at that age!”

 “For good reason,” Obito muttered. Kakashi may have been a genius, but he could be a real dunce when it came to basic self-care and some chores…

.o.o.o.

 Obito choked back a laugh when he saw Rock Lee for the first time. The boy looked like he could be Gai’s son. There was a tickling thought at the back of his head at that, a reminder that Gai’s father had the same limitations Lee supposedly did…maybe they were related and neither knew it? No, the kid was seven, and Might Dai had died over a decade ago.

 …Unless Gai had siblings he never talked about…nah. That wasn’t like Gai. Just one of life’s weird coincidences.

  Lee seemed to trust Gai, though, and was willing to follow them to the village outskirts, near the wall.

 “And you think this will be somewhere I can stay?” Lee asked.

 “Yes, my youthful friend,” Gai said. “I would take you in myself, would it not prevent my becoming your sensei once you graduate! But this place comes highly recommended by my comrade Obito!”

 Obito wouldn’t go that far. It seemed like a nice place, was all, and Nonou knew how to take care of kids. It was her whole ‘thing I want to do with my life’ and all. Seemed a good fit.

 They were met at the door by Watari, one of Kabuto’s civilian “older brothers” who trying to be protective of the young ninja while having no idea how to be protective of a young ninja and teasing Kabuto for being a “nerd.” Obito liked him. He was endearing.

 “Hey, Watari, need to see your mother,” Obito said. “Maybe have a new sibling for you.”

 “Okay,” Watari said before spotting Lee and then looking between him and Gai in confusion.

 Obito mouthed that they weren’t related. Watari looked incredulous. Obito nodded. Watari shrugged and told them to wait there before going inside. Lee started fiddling with his braid while Gai seemed interested in the carvings around the doorway.

 Obito was pretty sure Kabuto had mentioned one on Nonou’s kids was a carpenter and had practiced on the house. And once sawed apart part of Kabuto’s bed when he mixed up the colors and whites in her laundry.

 Nonou finally came to the door and smiled, “Hell, Obito. It’s been a little while. You said you may have a new charge for me?”

 “This is Lee,” Obito said. “Normally Gai would take him in but then he couldn’t be the kid’s sensei because of nepotism laws and he needs to be the kid’s sensei because reasons. So we’re trying to find a place to put Lee.”

 “Hello,” Lee said politely.

 “A pleasure to meet you,” Nonou said warmly before giving Obito and Gai a _look_. Crap. What did they do? “I’ll see if I can move people around enough to fit him in, we’re a little full ourselves right now. Can you maybe explain the situation to me more in my office?”

 Obito nodded. Lee’s condition deserved some privacy. “Sure.”

 “I am very sorry if this could crowd you. Obito thought you were the best choice,” Gai added.

 Nonou looked a little more accepting at that, “He only thinks that because Kabuto likes to talk about his home life now that he has one again.”

 In the office they handed her Lee’s file. Obito could tell when she got to the part about Lee’s condition because even the excellent actress couldn’t stop her eyebrows from rising a bit.

 “Hmm. Well, we’ll need to discuss specifics…Lee, dear, this will probably bore you,” Nonou said. She stood up and leaned out the door, “Kabuto!”

 There was the sound of someone scurrying down the stairs and Kabuto appear, book under his arm and slightly crooked glasses which he hurriedly straightened, “Yes, mother?”

 “Could you watch Lee here for a bit while I talk with Obito and Gai?” Nonou asked.

 “Oh. Um…sure,” Kabuto said, spotting Lee and waving him over. Lee followed him, and Kubuto briefly looked between Lee and Gai before shrugging and heading out.

 Obito tried not to laugh. He failed.

 “Ah, thank you,” Gai said. “Now, what did you want to talk about?”

 “Well, the file says something about being bullied?” Nonou asked.

 Gai nodded and began to explain everything. His job of facilitating the meting done, Obito sat back and listened.

.o.o.o.

 “So Might Guy is… _not_ your dad?” Kabuto checked.

 “No,” Lee admitted, swinging his legs a bit. Kabuto had picked a bench outside so he could keep reading at watch Lee at the same time. So far Lee made it easy by also sitting on the bench, though if we wanted to run or play there were good sight lines all around.

 Hana and Itachi freaking loved that Kabuto could come up with stuff like that. It made playing with Naruto, Kiba, and Sasuke much easier, allegedly. Kabuto just considered it an overall good skill.

 “And he clearly would want to take you in but…cannot?” Kabuto guessed. Maybe Gai took a ton of away missions or something? He was a very powerful jonin. Itachi respected him a great deal.

 “No, because he wants to be my sensei,” Lee said. “He… _needs_ to be my sensei, really. So he can’t.”

 “Why does Might Guy need to be your sensei?” Kabuto asked.

 “I…he’s the only one who can teach me stuff I can actually do,” Lee said, rubbing the back of his head. “I can’t mold chakra.”

 Kabuto frowned, “Lots of people have trouble-”

“No, I mean I _can’t_ ,” Lee emphasized, looking upset. “I actually, really _can’t_. Something is…wrong. It doesn’t work right.”

 “Do you know what’s going on, then?” Kabuto asked.

 Lee shook his head, “No. I just…I _wish_ I knew what was wrong with me, but I don’t.”

 “I’ll admit, I’m not sure either. It doesn’t sound like anything I’ve heard of….I could study it, if you like, since you’ll be staying here,” Kabuto offered. “Of course you should be prepared for the chance that it’s simply how you are and not something I can change.”

 “I would accept that if you could explain it!” Lee said, looking eager.

 “All right. Let’s make a deal,” Kabuto said. “I’ll try to figure out what’s going on with your chakra if you agree to let me supervise your training to make sure you don’t hurt yourself. Sound good?”

 “But…both of those things involve effort on your part!” Lee said. “That is not a fair trade.”

 “As a medic, I’ll consider you not harming yourself a bonus on my part, and I can practice medical techniques on you when you do,” Kabuto said, pushing his glasses up. “I am also a bit intrigued by your problem and wish to analyze it. So I _am_ actually getting what I want.”

 Lee frowned, “Are you certain?”

 “Sure,” Kabuto said.

.o.o.o.

 “Now we just need to figure out where to put him,” Nonou said, pulling out a file with room layouts on it. “I could put him in with a few other boys in his age range but since you said he was being bullied by his classmates he might not trust his peers so easily…”

 “I’m sure Lee could come to understand he is safe here, in time,” Gai said. “He really is a very kindhearted boy; things have just been hard for him recently.”

 “True, which may mean putting him with one of the older boys might be better. Give him someone a little more balanced out to deal with,” she said. “I know you were hoping Kabuto would perhaps be willing to monitor his training a bit but his room is on the small side, I’m not sure if-”

 “Mother, can Lee room with me?” Kabuto asked, leaning in the doorway.

 Nonou frowned, “Were you eavesdropping for the perfect moment to butt in?”

 “Maybe,” Kabuto hedged shamelessly. “Can he?”

 “You need to work on your tact, Kabuto,” Nonou sighed. “It’s going to get you killed on infiltration one day.”

 “Yes ma’am,” Kabuto sighed. “…I didn’t hear a no?”

 Nonou sighed, “Gai cares very deeply about Lee, Kabuto. This needs to be more than just a brief interest. Am I clear?”

 “Of course,” Kabuto said. “You know I know what it feels like to not fit in. I’m willing to help.”

 “In that case you have my thanks,” Gai said.

 Kabuto snorted, “Don’t thank me yet. I’ve heard how you train and if I’m to be Lee’s medic assistant in training the same way we’re going to butt heads.”

 Gai beamed, “Let us hope you prove yourself a worthy opponent!”

 Kabuto’s jaw dropped, “Hwah?”

 Nonou chuckled, “It seems you also still don’t know what to do when faced with the unexpected. We’ll need to work on that.”

 “Mother!” Kabuto whined, going red in the face.

 “Kabuto, you may be able to reach a special jonin certification in medical skill without any trouble but you still have work to go before the infiltration certification,” she warned. “I know, I used to give that rank out.”

 “Yes, Mother,” Kabuto sighed. “But I like Lee, truly. I think we’ll get along well.”

 “And you won’t be the only odd one out when Hana and Itachi start talking younger siblings?” Nonou asked.

 Kabuto looked genuinely surprised, “Actually that never occurred to me but it sounds good.”

 “All right, go show Lee your room,” Nonou said. Kabuto nodded and left and Nonou smiled proudly.

 “Oh wow,” Obito said as it dawned on him. “You…you set that up.”

“I thought Kabuto might get along with Lee form the file, and he was likely to be interested in Lee’s condition without being condescending about it,” Nonou said.

 Gai gave her a thumbs-up, “You truly understand you children well! I am sure Lee will be just fine under your care!”

 “Good, now we just need to do the paperwork,” Nonou said.

 “Oh, yay,” Obito sighed.

.o.o.o.

 Lee didn’t have too much stuff to add to Kabuto’s room once Sena finished helping convert Kabuto’s bed into a bunk bed and all the paperwork was handled. Still, Kabuto tried to help him make part of the space his own anyway.

 Lee took the top bunk since he was smaller and Kabuto had more odd hours due to his hospital internships.

 Late that night, Kabuto woke up from a nightmare involving Danzo and facelessness and _Mother_ to find Lee half-hanging off the top bunk, watching him, “Ah!”

 “I’m sorry! I just wanted to make sure you were all right!” Lee said, hopping down. “…That sounded bad.”

 “I…didn’t take that into account before rooming with someone, I’ll admit,” Kabuto said. He hadn’t known his nightmares were noisy. He hadn’t shared a room since coming back.

 Lee hesitated before leaning forward and hugging Kabuto. Kabuto smiled and patted him on the head.

  “Thank you,” Kabuto said.

 “I like to help people. That is part of why I want to be a ninja,” Lee said.

 “That’s one of the better reasons,” Kabuto said, smiling softly. This kid was so innocent.

 Kabuto decided then and there that he’d remove a kidney from the first asshole to shatter that innocence.

 “Come on, little ninjas to be need their rest,” he said, patting the cot.

 “Oh! Thank you,” Lee said, rubbing the back of his head. “You…don’t mind?”

 “No,” Kabuto said. Lee stretched out beside him and, after some momentary hesitation, curled into his side.

 Kabuto patted Lee on the head. He’d have to ask Hana and Itachi about how to properly handle little brothers. He was flying blind here and just going by what he assumed would help. He’d hate to make a mistake so early in the relationship.

 He really liked this kid.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arg, this chapter took FOREVER. Most of it was written but the connectors didn't want to connect for so long and GAH. 
> 
> Anyway this takes place a little under a year after the ROOT arc, as visible by Lee's noted age (seven, making Kabuto now thirteen instead of twelve since he's only six years older than Lee).
> 
> Lee's family situation has always fascinated me. We know pretty much NOTHING other than he's not Gai's son and he later has a kid with no seen wife. So in this universe he was orphaned at some point around or shortly after the Kyuubi attack and has been bouncing between places. Gai would love to take him in, really, but you cannot sensei your own children in their genin team. It's nepotism. So we went to Nonou! And Kabuto!
> 
> Kabuto and Lee are so much fun in the planned sequel I have to this, which takes place when Naruto's generation are genin. Lee is good for Kabuto since Lee's very empathetic and caring and Kabuto is good for Lee since he can make sure Lee doesn't overdo it (at least, when he recognized something as over doing it...) Lee is still Lee, but he's picked up some interesting things from his medic/spy older brother and looks up to Kabuto a lot. But more of that later. 
> 
> We're actually shifting a little bit of the focus onto the Itachi-Hana-Kabuto team next time, as they convince Obito to help them on a great quest a year or so after this chapter. Obito couldn't say no, they have a great reason. And Shisui seems to be trying to involve himself as well...idk, that one's only just getting started; we'll see how it goes!


	40. Hunt I: Diagnosis

 

“So where’s Itachi?” Hana asked when only Kabuto was there to meet her.

 “No idea,” Kabuto admitted, glancing up from his book. “You’re both late, really.”

 “Gee, thanks,” Hana said, gesturing for the Haimaru triplets. Hashi shot forward and grabbed Kabuto’s book while Rumi and Macha stopped Kabuto from stopping the theft.

 “Hana!” Kabuto barked, polite façade dropping to show annoyance.

 “Just looking at your reading material, “she teased, taking the book from Hashi. “Hmm. More on chakra systems. For Lee?”

 “My own curiosity,” Kabuto said curtly after finally throwing her dogs off to take his book back. He adjusted his glasses. “You could have _asked_.”

 “But then you could have lied,” Hana said, grinning. She knew he knew she had his number.

 Kabuto scowled, “We’re friends, you have to give me the _opportunity_ to tell the truth.”

 “I think you’re still working on how friendship works,” Hana said, her grin widening. “Oh, there he is!”

 Kabuto turned to look where she was, “Uchiha! You’re late!”

 “Sorry. Izumi fainted and I had to help her home,” Itachi said as he jogged over.

 “Which one of your relatives is Izumi again?” Hana asked as they headed for the mission office.

 “She’s not a close relative, but she’s in the clan,” Itachi said. “We’re friends, and she’s good with Sasuke.”

 “Ah, she passed the gold standard,” Kabuto said knowingly. “So, is she sick?”

 Itachi sighed, “There’s something…off, with her Sharingan. It drains chakra far too quickly and causes her bad headaches. She was helping me warm up and…well.”

 “Ooh. Sorry to hear that,” Hana said. “Do you know what’s wrong?”

 “No,” Itachi sighed.

 “I could take a look at it,” Kabuto offered.

 Itachi gave him an unimpressed look, “Kabuto, the problem is with her Sharingan.”

 “Yes, and given you mentioned headaches I think it may be with how her optic nerve connects to her brain-”

 “Kabuto, if you try to study the Sharingan some of my clan will try to kill you,” Itachi spelled out.

 “Oh, well. Couldn’t you cover for me?” Kabuto asked. “Clan heir and all?”

 “ _Or_ you could not make trouble,” Itachi offered.

 “Well, maybe Kabuto has a point and it’s not the Sharingan, per say. So, if he studied everything but that…” Hana said. Besides. Kabuto was built to make trouble. He was a trained spy, after all. They just needed to try and manage the trouble.

 “…That could work,” Itachi said, grinning at Hana.

 “So, what you’re saying is you need me to study her eyes… _without_ studying her Sharingan,” Kabuto said slowly.

 “Are you up to it or not?” Itachi asked.

 “Please, am I the most talented medic you know or what?” Kabuto bragged.

 “No,” Itachi said.

 “Excuse me?” Kabuto asked.

 “He knows Rin Nohara, Kabuto. He introduced you to her,” Hana muttered, putting her face in her hands.

 “Well am I not the most _innovative_ medic you know?” Kabuto tried.

 “Rin transplanted a Sharingan into a non-Uchiha with total success in the middle of a warzone,” Itachi said.

 “That’s not innovative. Incredible, certainly, but it’s just a transplant,” Kabuto said. “Where’s the _innovation_?”

 “You’re only digging yourself a hole, please stop,” Hana said.

 “Fine. Yes, I’ll do it,” Kabuto said. “After the mission.”

.o.o.o.

 “Are we sure about this?” Izumi asked.

 “I know what I’m doing, this is a basic eye exam,” Kabuto huffed.

 “Do not impugn his medical skills. Even by accident. He gets snippy,” Hana said.

 Kabuto glared at her. Itachi elbowed him since it was true.  

 So far, the plan was simple. Kabuto would conduct examinations of Hana and Izumi’s eyes and then compare the data. Outside of Hana seeing spots when she channeled chakra to her eyes as a test, it seemed to be going well. At the very least Kabuto was producing an impressive amount of notes that Itachi was having a little bit of trouble reading since Kabuto’s handwriting became nigh-illegible when he rushed.

 “All right, so, good news by this point is I don’t _think_ I need to do Sharingan research for this because just comparing stuff to Hana you seem off,” Kabuto said as he continued taking notes. “The optic nerves are slightly different and while I’m sure there’s differences with people whose bloodlines have special eyes they’re also really off from what I remember from Sasuke’s that time he ran into a tree and got dirt in his eyes and I had to fix it so he’d finally stop crying.”

“How different?” Itachi asked, repressing the urge to hit Kabuto upside the head.

 “The eyes connect to the brain, there seem to be some issues there, some bits that should be connecting but aren’t and also some trauma around the bits of the brain they should be connected to,” Kabuto said. “I’m only so experienced with head trauma since all my cases before this are kids hurting themselves training. What is your history of head trauma?”

 “Um…not much,” Izumi said. “Just from taijutsu training.”

 “That’s wonderful!” Kabuto said, grinning as he wrote more.

 Itachi scowled and punched him.

 Kabuto swiped at him with his pen, “You messed up my notes!”

 “You said it was wonderful my friend has had head trauma form taijutsu training!” Itachi hissed.

 “…Oh. Oh, not that. That’s wonderful because I know about that and what to do with it,” Kabuto said politely.

 Hana buried her face in her hands and started snickering.

 “Um, good,” Izumi said, smiling to try to diffuse the tension. “So, what do you think?”

 “I’d have to do a more in-depth exam, honestly,” Kabuto said. “I could probably talk the hospital into letting me use a scanner, just say you were sparring and getting headaches and we wanted to check or something.”

 “Do you often lie to hospital staff?” Hana asked.

 “No,” Kabuto said. “Usually they give me what I need without it. And we’re not really lying here because something is wrong with her head, we’re just tweaking the cause for easier scanner access.”

 “I’m not sure you have proper medic ethics,” Hana said.

 “Why?” Kabuto asked. Hana stared at him with a frown and he stared back innocently. At least Itachi assumed it was innocent. Innocent was Kabuto’s default expression, whether or not he was actually _being_ innocent, and it made him a bit of a nightmare to read sometimes.

 And, if Itachi was to be perfectly honest with himself, it also made Kabuto more than a little scary, too.

 “Well come on then,” Hana said, standing up and dusting herself off. “Let’s go lie to the hospital.”

.o.o.o.

 “I am getting concerned,” Izumi admitted. Kabuto continued making interested-sounding noises while looking at the scanner results and X-rays. “Very concerned.”

 “He gets very absorbed in his work,” Hana said, looking at one of the X-rays Kabuto wasn’t pouring over. “Though I’m not sure what’s so interesting. Your optic nerve does seem to have some degradation compared to Itachi’s, but-”

 “No, no, it’s what happened when she channels chakra!” Kabuto said. “See! It’s exactly as I hypothesized! The damage to the optic nerve prevents enough chakra from getting through the bottleneck, so the rest built up and begins to create a backlash which causes the headaches while she becomes exhausted from trying to force enough chakra through the bottleneck to sustain her Sharingan!”

 “And again, can you _not_ sound so excited about something that is _bad_?” Itachi asked.

 “Apologies,” Kabuto said, either contrite or faking it well enough to pass. “This is…very interesting.”

 “Can you fix it?” Izumi asked.

 “I’m…not sure. I know how to repair nerves in theory but in practice I’m much better with muscle, bone, and tissue,” Kabuto said. “Nerves are usually for messing up, not fixing, in my toolkit…I suppose I could look through Rin-sensei’s old notes on Obito and Kakashi, that involved optic nerve repair and fusing as well as other nerve repair from Obito’s recover in his early teen years…”

 “That would be hard to get out of her unless we came clean,” Itachi noted. “Those documents are highly classified. I’m honestly surprised you know what’s in them.”

 “I’m me,” Kabuto said flippantly.

 “You are a walking security breach. The rest of the Intel community must hate you,” Hana said.

 Kabuto looked honestly proud, “Some of them really do.”

 “Back to business,” Izumi said, waving one of the X-rays.

 “Okay so…this is a little…weird,” Kabuto said. “But if I had to differentiate between you channeling chakra to your eyes vs. Hana channeling chakra to hers it is clearly the bottleneck that is the issue!”

 “What?” Izumi asked.

 “The chakra flow to your eyes…something is wrong with it,” Kabuto said. “I mean, I could borrow Rin’s notes about Obito and Kakashi to _try_ and be certain but it could theoretically be because your mother married outside the clan, as Kakashi claims the Sharingan takes a lot more chakra for him to use than Obito and it is merely his unique circumstances that allow him to use it, however you are half Uchiha by blood and came by the Sharingan honestly so frankly I think examining the bottleneck is more of a priority than simply falling back on—you’re not listening.”

 “You talked about stealing Rin Nohara’s notes, again,” Itachi said, exasperated. “The notes many clan elders want to _kill her_ for having and only won’t since Kakashi is technically clan now and examining his and Obito’s condition has since been deemed beneficial.”

 “So?” Kabuto asked.

 “If you memorize those notes, which you will do on instinct, the Uchiha clan will be _out for your blood_ ,” Hana said.

 “Oh,” Kabuto said. Yet again with the look like he didn’t understand why that might be a problem which could be entirely fabricated for all Itachi knew. Itachi was very quickly reaching the point where punching him again looked like a good idea.

 “Let’s _focus_ on the bottleneck,” Izumi said firmly. “Can you examine that further?”

 “I can examine _anything_ further,” Kabuto said.

 “Like why can Lee activate seals but not make them?” Hana asked.

 “Wrong idea, Lee can make seals, he simply cannot infuse them with chakra,” Kabuto said snidely. “And he can activate them with blood, it’s a fairly common trigger after chakra.”

 “…Putting chakra in seals is kind of a big part of making them,” Hana teased.

 “Shut up…” Kabuto muttered. “I’ll work on it.”

.o.o.o.

 Itachi was not too surprised to find Kabuto standing outside the compound the next morning, “You had a breakthrough.”

 “Yes and no,” the medic sighed. “I have a something.”

 Itachi was not impressed, “A…something.”

 “Look at this,” Kabuto said flipping through his notebook and presenting a page to Itachi.

 “I am not a medic and this means nothing to me,” Itachi said after a few moments of trying to decipher the data tables, charts, and medical terms all crammed onto the page in neat tiny writing.

 “It is clearly an isolation of chakra fluctuation in specific area of the optic nerve during activation of her eyes, keep up!” Kabuto said.

 “…You’ve had no one to rant about this to yet,” Itachi said.

 “I thought you’d rather I keep it classified now would it kill you to help me with the rest?” Kabuto asked.

 “All right, all right, let me go get Izumi,” Itachi said.

 “No, wait, I still need some help with this!” Kabuto said, catching his arm and hauling him bodily outside the compound. Itachi really hoped no one saw that. He didn’t want to answer why a former agent of Danzo’s was dragging him around.

 “The _problem_ is I don’t understand chakra-based nerve regeneration to be able to find any solution from these notes due to the chakra backlash as I’m not sure how to eliminate that while also fixing what I want to fix,” Kabuto said. “I could not find any material on the subject. And I tried. I almost missed curfew.”

 “You have a curfew?” Itachi asked.

 Kabuto ignored him, “So since I cannot find anything at all to help me on the subject we’re at a bit of a brick wall here. While I wouldn’t mind testing some things I’d effectively need to reverse-engineer the chakra backlash issue in my subjects and that would take forever since I’d have to find enough small animals with active-enough chakra systems and then try to replicate Izumi’s various head injuries on them while essentially _praying_ it resulted in similar issues-”

 “I can see the problem with that, yes,” Itachi said. “Other ideas?”

 “We could ask for help, but would need someone much more advanced than anything I can find in Konoha and _yes_ I’m counting Rin, I already asked Rin, Rin is concerned about what I’m getting myself into but wasn’t able to help, so Rin is out,” Kabuto said. “We need to go higher.”

 “I’m not sure how much higher we can go…unless…” Itachi mused when suddenly something occurred to him. “Hm. I wonder if we can hire ourselves…”

 “Hire ourselves for what?” Kabuto asked.

.o.o.o.

 “So according to our deeply amused Hokage, this is a combination escort mission and person of interest hunt?” Kakashi asked.

 “Yes, we need to speak with Lady Tsunade about Izumi’s eyes,” Itachi said.

 Kakashi only didn’t groan aloud because these were children and he had a reputation as a calm, collected jonin to maintain. “Tsunade.”

 “Yes, we are going to find her and ask her help in the matter,” Kabuto said.

 “Kabuto doesn’t understand how to do what we think his notes say to do,” Hana supplied.  Kabuto gave her a dirty look while Itachi and Izumi snickered.

 Kakashi silently evaluated his life choices and tried to figure out how his ninja career had come to chaperoning a bunch of teens and preteens chasing down one of the Legendary Sannin for medical advice because Sensei thought he could help with the tracking.

 It was probably all Obito’s fault. That meant he probably had to roll with it.

 “All right then squad, escort,” he sighed. “Let’s get this mess on the road.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, when no local medics know--find the ultimate medic!
> 
> This isn't Tsunade Retrieval, they're just going to ask her a question and pay for services. I was going to have Obito go instead of Kakashi, but Obito fit the other thing I'm going better and Kakashi's a better tracker so I siwtched 'em. Shisui's staying home for a good reason--his spotlight chapter, which should come after the next one. 
> 
> I really liked Izumi Uchiha when I looked her up. She was a surprisingly rounded character for one essentially invented just out of an offhand comment that Itachi once had a girlfriend. Tho I changed the reason she has Sharingan issues to something a little more fun, and let Kabuto's mad scientist side show off how it can be used for good.
> 
> I had to give the Haimaru Triplets individual names because I can't see Hana never referring to them individually. They're her dogs, she has to have named them something.


End file.
